Raxael's Tulpa Journal

[Raxael]

Hello. My name is Jackson, aka Raxael. My tulpa's name is Jillian.

 

Anyway, this journal will be updated anywhere from daily to weekly, depending on what is going on; but, I'll try to get in somewhat frequent updates. For the most part, this journal is intended for myself so that I don't give up on tulpamancy and go through with it, since I'll feel like I ran away if I drop the journal. Comments are still appreciated, though.

 

Now, a little bit about Jillian. Currently, I have only given her a few traits. These are: determined, honest, outgoing, athletic (can this count as a trait?), and social. I designed her to be everything I aspire to be, pretty much. I have a serious issue with determination, and being able to have that determination would pretty much cover everything I want to be. On to appearance. Currently, all Jillian is is a ball of light, as I intend to let her decide what she wants to look like. Same goes for the wonderland.

 

So far, I have not gotten any obvious responses from Jillian, but I have only been at it for a few days.

 

I can't really think of anything else to say in the main post. Enjoy the journal, hopefully it won't be too boring.

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Day 1-4

 

This post will cover everything that I have done up to today, as this journal is being made a few days after I started.

 

For the past 4 or 5 days, I've been trying to 'force' for at least half an hour each day. From what I can tell, that is pretty productive; I do intend to ramp it up a bit, though. For the first couple days, I went over the traits I gave her. I didn't give her too many, as I intend for her to develop her own personality. Past that, all I have been doing is narrating to her in bed. I just discuss things like current events, my day, my hopes and dreams, etc etc. I've also read her some forum posts, but does that count as forcing? I would assume so, because I'm still talking to her, but I'd like confirmation. It can be difficult to think of things to talk about with her since she isn't able to respond yet, so reading things from the internet seems like a good choice.

 

Also, some extra details about Jillian. She will (hopefully) be human. She will be atleast 16 years old. It seems kind of weird having my tulpa be 19 or whatever she'll end up being despite being less than a year old in reality, but then again, I don't want to have to deal with a talking infant. Maybe tulpas are actually the same age as you no matter what, even if they think otherwise, and they are just dormant inside us our entire life, waiting to be awakened? Who knows. Hopefully some sort of sciency experiment will solve it.

 

Also, I think I've come to the decision that her birthday will be when she first responds, however it may be.