The Birth of Maa

[Suilichious]

I first read about the tulpa-phenomenon in a image board, where someone had just created a forum about tulpae. As a fan of all things occult, I grew interested. Funnily enough, as I learned it was more of a psychology-thing, I found the tulpae even more fascinating. After spending a day wondering if I should take this thing seriously, I decided to start creating a tulpa of my own.

 

Now, I've never even meditated before, so the idea of imposing seemed funny, foreign and difficult for me. After actually closing my laptop for a moment, closing my eyes and lying down, putting on some relaxation music, I found it was cool as hell!

 

I began imposing a few days ago, only spent 3 or so hours just picturing the tulpa in my head, and talking to it (even if I feel like just talking to myself). The first thing that popped in my head was a mass of elements, and two colors. I also felt a presence of something very soothing, calm, strong, wise, motherly. The idea in my mind started taking a form of a female feline, a snow leopard of sorts. It took the characteristics from a hunter-pet from World of Warcraft, Loque'nahak and his mate, Har'Koa... It might sound silly, but that's the shape she took. Snow leopard with silvery swirls as its spots, sharp, pointed ears, a thick tail, and a bright blue inner fire shining through the fur.

 

I can't say I've heard her voice yet, but I know what she sounds like. More of WoW here, she sounds like Ysera the Dreamer. I find her voice beautiful and soothing. The second session I had, birthed me something of a name. "Maa", "Mahveena", "Maya". I decided to go with Maa (Earth in my native tongue!) for the time being. Maybe she'll tell me her name more clearly some other time.

 

So far I've spent my sessions thinking about how exactly she looks, and "reading aloud" her personality. So far I've gathered she's pretty much catlike. She's somewhat feral and often acts of instinct. She's confident in herself, and hopefully me, too. When she's relaxing, she sleeps or just lies down. She's a tad lazy! Despite the laziness and the basic cat-attitude (I don't give a fudge!), she's willing to help and protect her host and maybe other tulpas. She also has some sense of humor, and she might like to annoy me at times... Maa is also curious, as felines tend to be. Also, her favorite color is pink.

 

Curiously waiting forward my next evening-walk in the dark with the relaxation music, to further impose her. :>

[Suilichious]

Been busy with school recently, but instead of forcing by meditation, I've tried to take Maa a part of my daily life. I try to imagine what her face looks like, play around with Gimp and pictures of snow leopards. I draw pictures of her possible humanoid form, and often chat to her as I sit in the school bus. It's kinda what I'm creating Maa for, to have company, someone to soothe my social anxiety and relax me when I'm alone in the big city... I'd have good time for just sitting and entering my wonderland in the bus, but the sound of the bus tends to make me sleepy. ^^'

 

Attached one of the Gimp-experiments here.