Ely's Progress Log

[Ely]

Forgive me for making such a blant title, I promise that if I ever, for some reason, make another thread, I'll try to make it more appealing. I assumed that this was a progress report, and my tulpa's name is, who is just a blue egg as I type this, is just, you know, Blue. And no, this is not me being uncreative, I just gave him a very basic name so he can choose his own name as he develops more and more.

 

So let's talk a bit about me and this progress log.

 

I'm Ely, I'm 18 years old male, english is not my native language and I've been interested in tulpas since my late 16s. I planned to make one immediately, but I guessed that I shoul keep off and learn more about it, question myself to see if I can do it, because some guides said that I should. So for the past years, I occasionally dropped in, chekced things out, read some discussions and guides but most of all, progress reports. I don't like "reports" for some reason so I'm going with log instead.

 

I'm a very freedom-loving person and I want to give my tulpa that as much as I possibly can. I guess it just feels right to me. As I said, his name is just going to be Blue until he can decide for himself. I planned to make my tulpa a human male first but I realized that there was a high chance of me falling in love with him, since he is going to be really close to me and you know the relationship between a tulpa and his host more than I do by this point. So Blue will be given a bird like form, with some fantasy aspects, and I'll probably make him create ice from his wings or mouth because why not, he is a tulpa with no physical rules, I guess we should have fun with that. Besides, touching the ice he makes, would be a nice way to raise my wonderland-connections sense-wise.

 

I've decided to give him a blue egg form for easier visualisation until I finish the personality step. However, our personality step is going to be pretty light, because I just want to give him a template, so he can be his own self, you know? I'm mostly going to work on essence and energy, I guess you can call it that. Like the way he feels as a being, I'm sure the essence and feel topics can tell you what I mean here. It's going to be as vague as possible and our forcing sessions wil consist mostly of me narrating and walking around wonderland.

 

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Today, I tried to narrate to him as much as possible. I imagine his egg form with me in real life to get a kick start in open eyed visualisation and impostion. I talked about myself and things I plan to do forcing wise, explained him his existence and why he is an egg as a start and how much I want him to be free to be whatever and look like whatever he wants.

 

I mostly imagine him hovering over my right shoulder, I guess it is just me, but I like to feel a slight weight, (obviously in my mind,) there and it makes me feel good. I started feeling head pressures immediately, they mostly appear when I'm narrating to him, and not as much during normal hours, even while I'm typing this, thre pressure I feel is very strong. I'm pretty sure it is not me, I guess I have a really open mind, that's why.

 

I'm a pagan, not the one that is from tvs but the kind that knows magic is mostly sitting in a room with at least 3 candles and meditating, hoping you will not burn to death thanks to the candles, boring in a degree, but I like my rituals. I've chosen this religion because of the naturality aspect and not the magic, and I guess twin deity idea feels warmer to me.

 

I'm not sure if I'll add my tulpa to my practices. But I'm sure that Blue will atleast help me focus and do better with energy manipulation, (trust me, energy manipulation is not what you think. It is about using oils, incenses, candles, papers anything you can use to do symbolism to get an effect. I can't throw kamehamehas, sorry.)

 

I guess that will be it for now. I hope it all goes well.

 

I'll drink some orange juice now.

[Ely]

Alright, Ely signing in.

10/14/2014, Tuesday.

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Last night, after reading this guide, I've decided to start doing a very vague personality outline for Blue. So I made a nice place in my room, cushions and incense, candle, it was all cozy. After drinking some herbal tea with cinnamon, black tea, blackberry leaves, blueberry leaves, ginger, vanilla, chicory root, clove, liquorice, cardamom fruit and black pepper, I was in a very nice state of mind.

 

In fact, that tea was so delicious I'll drink one after typing this.

 

First, I meditated, no forcing, for 5 to 8 minutes. As days go on, I'll make it longer and longer, hopefully. After that, I've created the following traits as a basic outline.

 

-Calm.

-Intelligent.

-Good.

 

As you can tell, the traits are very basic and not detailed. I've told Blue that he can be whoever he wants to be, that I created these traits for him, only as an outline, while I do prefer him to keep these, I said that it is alright if he doesn't choose to. But I guess I'll only force the first trait a bit more.

 

The forcing part consisted of me explaining the trait, telling Blue that he has the the trait, then explaining why he has it and how having that trait affects him. After repeating this 2-3 times, I started the visualization part. One blue sphere of water for the trait and two little other spheres of water around this big one for why he has it and how it affects him. Then his egg would be covered with the big sphere, the water would be sucked in, and the little spheres, after spinning around the egg for a bit, would clash into it, getting inside it. This way, I felt as I explained Blue the trait and rooted it, then gave it to him as visualization, which in my opinion, is less set-in-stone than using the talking forcing style for traits. After each trait, I (we I guess?) meditated for a short bit without talking, then I would narrate a bit, then we would do the other trait. After all of the traits were done, I just narrated, and fed him some natural energy. I guess I do lean to the metaphysical side of things. But I don't think I'll hit those topics ever, since they were mostly... Naaaah.

 

I don't expect my tulpa to touch stuff and destroy stuff and be the 1337 h4x0r or something. I just preferred him to be an energy-being instead of all in my head-being, if that can even explain it. Also, he having magical energy inside would allow him to be my familiar, which is amazingly awesome.