Seeing with my mind's eye

[A Sack of Cats]

Hello all, I posted a while ago asking for help on a tulpa, but I've put everything on hold till exams are done. Anyhow, I need help with seeing with my mind's eye, because my brain seems to be dead-set against any type of imagination/Visualization/hallucinations.

 

I tried being relaxed, clearing my head (Well, I couldn't completely clear it, but I got it down to only thinking "In" and "Out" whenever I breathed, with only a few random thoughts doing. Nothing happened.

 

I tried sitting in a dark room, closing my eyes, and trying to see SOMETHING, but again, nothing at all.

 

Next I tried listening to white noise (through over ear headphones so no other sound could reach me) and even after half an hour, the most of an auditory hallucination I got was what sounded like a band (I couldn't tell, very faint) playing some rock music every now and then, but certainly not loud/clear enough to be able to tell what song it was, or even some words.

 

So after this I went all out; I sealed off my room so no one would interrupt me, I played white noise over my head phones, and I cut a ping-pong ball in half, taped them over my eyes. I read about it on /b/, and it's supposed to, within minutes, case either auditory or visual hallucinations because of the total lack of stimuli. But after half an hour, HALF A GODDAMN HOUR, the most I saw was a few purple flashes and no foreign sounds whatsoever.

 

Most of above is just trying to be able to imagine something; I simply can't do it, and I've put literally hours at a time trying to imagine simple colors with no avail. I heard something about not imagining things on the backs of your eyelids, but I guess that's what I need help with.

 

TL;DR What can I do to see with my mind's eye, as my body it dead-set against not allowing my to visualize/hear things that aren't there, and I feel this will pretty much not allow me to make a tulpa.

[waffles]

You'd be lucky to start hallucinating without a lot more effort than you put in. What you should probably be aiming for is visualisation.

 

Assuming that you've read the many, many visualisation guides floating around here, the best advice I can give you is that your 'mind's eye' is just you imagining something. So, if I told you to imagine your room or house, then you might 'see' it. Visualisation doesn't mean vividly see, at least, not at first.

[A Sack of Cats]

I'll read some more visualization guides, try for another week or so, and if I don't see any results, I guess I'll come ask again.

 

Thanks for the help!

[Raff88]

I've just passed the stage your in! It takes a while to achieve any real result. I was going to start taking drugs to help with it it was that bad! (still might but I really don't think I need it now). Anyways, the trick is to stop trying! Keep your eyes opened but do not focus them! Repeat affirmations to yourself like "my tulpa is becoming more real visually" so your subconscious knows what your doing. Remind yourself how real your tulpa will seem. Set yourself deadlines. Talk to your tulpa. Put on some nice slow meditation music, relax and enjoy the trance. Your subconsious does all the hard work, just enjoy the experience! It can also help being in dim lighting looking (without focusing) at some pattern like curtains. They will start to move and shape your tulpa eventually :)

 

You should do this for an hour a day or as much as you can. It's a long process just try to enjoy the anticipation. It will get easier :)

 

That's the basics you can play around with it a bit, everyone's different and all. Make sure your personality and alls done cause when you start seeing your tulpa you need to be able to know and trust them.

 

For the ping pong trick, your meant to use a u-v light so they glow but I've never tried it.