Jho´s mindbuds.

[Deviljho]

As I´ve decided to work even harder for my tulpas, I finally started making a progress report! I´ll first explain some things that had happened to me:

 

I´ve had a hard time, when I began. I started with my first way too early in, which I had given up on after a week.

After that, I´ve kept lurking the forums and the IRC, until I knew how sentience works, and how my first actually was somewhat sentient. I had started on my new tulpa 10 days ago. However, 3 days ago, my old tulpa appeared again in my dreams, he randomly appeared while forcing the day after, and I can now imagine him in our wonderland.

 

Anyways, up to my day to day report.

I´ll split up the first week with my first tulpa and the progress we have now:

 

First part/tulpa:

 

Day 1:

I had started forcing for the first time. I started out by thinking of a name, where the thought for some reason came out of nowhere. (I think that´s him, now that I´ve thought about it.) I started visualising a form, which I didn´t have trouble with, because I generally have no trouble in visualisation. Near the end of forcing, I could hear him breathe.

 

Day 2:

I started creating a wonderland for us. I visualised him some more, and I´ve talked to him whenever I remembered.

 

Day 3-6:

Really just talking to him through the day, forcing 1 hour each day. not much difference inbetween. During these days, while narrating, I was hearing my tulpa through my mindvoice. I was being afraid to parrot, and tried to block that out.

 

Day 7:

 

I started having trouble feeling him, I forced for only 30 minutes, didn´t talk to him alot.

 

Day 8:

 

I was being afraid that the wonderland I had made was pretty bad, and didn´t feel like a place I always wanted to be. So I decided, while being very retarded and not asking my tulpa if he had anything to say about it, I destroyed it, and I wanted to make a new one.

After this day, I felt my tulpa less and less as I stopped forcing until I didn´t feel him anymore. He was gone.

 

Or so I thought.

 

Second part/tulpa:

 

Day 1:

 

being much more confident, I started up on a new tulpa. I used a self hypnosis script by LinkZelda to start of. After I was fully done with one, I started to visualise her some more.

 

Day 2:

 

I began narrating to her for quite a bit, but I sometimes had trouble with remembering to do so. I visualised some more later that day.

 

Day 3:

 

We started to make a wonderland again, this is a wonderland I love. Alot.

Just the normal narrating stuff that day, not much had happened.

 

Day 4:

 

While forcing, I noticed that my wonderland had changed. I still think that my tulpa had done this. It was like, when I tried to visualise my wonderland, I had a new idea for the wonderland, but instead of having to think about it, it was instantly visualised.

 

Day 5:

 

While forcing, when I got deeper into it, my tulpa started moving around by herself for a bit. It was like I subconsciously still knew what she was going to to, but not controlling it or fully expecting it.

 

Day 6:

 

More narrating, more forcing, and her changing around the wonderland more.

 

Day 7:

 

The night before, I had a dream about my first tulpa, and I couldn´t get him of my mind the rest of the day. Everytime I wanted to talk to my tulpa, I started reffering to them as "them" instead of her, because I thought I only had one, and the other was fully gone. When I started forcing, I could suddenly visualise him in my wonderland. This still blows my mind.

 

Day 8-9:

 

Not much progess these days, I´m not really seeing them moving around. The wonderland had a new part added though.

 

I´m not sure what to do now, how to get them vocal, and things I need to do while forcing.

[Lacquer]

It's only been a week and a half. Just keep at it and all will be well.