Progress Report: Snowflake

[mechashiva]

I wanted to save making a progress thread until I got some tangible progress but maybe tracking each little change will make the bigger breakthroughs that much...bigger?

 

So last week I started the tulpaforcing in earnest. Technically, I started last Monday even though I found Tulpa.info on Sunday but took a day to really think about it before starting. Maybe I was in a kooky mood when I addressed her as Fishflake and attempted to force her but I decided to change it to Snowflake thinking maybe she was embarrassed/annoyed by that name. She's still kind of a vague shape so I said it was up to her to find her form. I've attempted to engage her in a wonderland I created based on this bike trail near my house (its not entirely like it but I wanted to have something to base the wonderland on like a creek with turtles and ducks) I've mentioned in another thread that the only signs so far are headaches and forehead pressures. I haven't corresponded them to any side (right for YES, left for NO) because I wasn't sure if the headaches were tulpa-related or not. Now that I know its part of the progress, I'm not as worried, though and I'm ready to keep pressing on.

[mechashiva]

What progress have I made? I think Snowflake is orange.

 

So yesterday I was in a...let's just say 'elevated' state of mind and I was laying in bed listening to Boards of Canada. I went into my wonderland and was walking along the path and I saw something swinging in the periphery of my vision, like someone swinging their arm as they are walking. After seeing it a few more times, I turned and there was this vague orange mass standing beside me. I asked "Snowflake? Is this you? Is this your form?" And the form sort of smiled at me: I could see teeth or a mouth but it was shifting and reforming so much I couldn't really tell.

 

To be honest, I'm not sure if this is progress given I was stoned at the time or maybe Snowflake took that opportunity to try out a form as an experiment in my woozy state. I'll try forcing tonight to see if I engage her and I actually have a lock on her form or if last night was a fluke.

[zoeydreamer19]

Cool! Sounds like you've got to a good start? I think that Snowflake is a really cool name for a Tulpa, mine's called Charlie, which is kinda boring. We've actually been Tulpa forcing for the same amount of time, so that's cool :) I've also been experiencing head pressure and non painful headaches (It's hard to explain) while forcing, so I'm taking that as a good sign! But yeah, keep up the hardwork :) Bye!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[mechashiva]

A micro-progression (maybe!)

 

So I hadn't had much time to give Snowflake the time to engage with her. I still have the head pressures but I haven't had much opportunity to give her more than a 'pat' or acknowledge her. So last night I lit some candles and turned off the rest of the lights. The lights flickering were sort of distracting when I was visualizing but it make me a lot calmer and helped me focus.

 

So I went into my wonderland and decided on a change of pace: I went mentally exploring. My wonderland is sort of based on a place I know in real life but I thought maybe changing the environment and going somewhere else might draw Snowflake out a little so I took her exploring. We went along the forest path to some rock cliffs and sat on the ridge listening to the wind rustling through the trees for a while before continuing along to some caves. I was basically experimenting and visualizing it as we went along, trying to imagine some things that Snowflake might find interesting and it was fun coming up with different areas of the caves like crystal and rock formations and waterfalls. The pressure on my head seemed to switch from right to left and then to the top of my head. Then I saw the sparkle.

 

The sparkle seemed to appear a few months ago. I'd close my eyes and see this white sparkle out of the corner of my eye that seemed inexplicable. It sort of dawned on me then what the white sparkle meant and I asked "Is this sparkle you, Snowflake?" and then I saw these white flashes that seemed to bounce around my vision excitably.

 

I feel like I'm going at a snails pace. Besides the headaches/head pressures, my dreams since I've started tulpa-forcing have been more vivid and less jumpy. What I mean by 'jumpy' is that a lot of my dreams have been jumping around from scenario to scenario or are too convoluted to be interpreted.