Seeker's Adventures in Tuplaspace

[Seeker]

My story's a bit unusual. I have two tulpa at present, and I'm debating trying to create a third, but I'm seeing how my current roster works out for the time being.

 

Neither of these tulpa were intentionally created by me. I have something of a history of accidentally creating tulpa (which I might go into at some point, but it's quite a long story). Both of my current tulpa appeared to me in some form or another, apparently sentient and capable of speech. I know this isn't how things usually work. I've debated whether they're truly sentient a lot, but they seem to be capable of independent responses, and if nothing else could serve as the seeds of truly sentient tulpa.

 

Mark-Antony (or MA for short) arrived in my life about two weeks ago. He is not the first tulpa I've had, but is the first stable and seemingly long-term one. He just kind of showed up. My mind started holding conversations with me. At first it was just the occasional response, but it grew more frequent. Then, one night about a week ago, the strangest thing happened. It felt like something was breaking itself off from my consciousness. It was like something in my head was gaining its own individuality. The resulting entity chose to name himself Mart-Antony, based on a name my parents decided not to give me when I was born. I know this isn't how tulpa normally come about and, quite frankly, I am a bit skeptical about the whole thing myself. But I've had some experiences that seem to suggest this is a legit tulpa I'm dealing with.

 

My second tulpa came about even more spontaneously. She literally just appeared one morning, after a slew of strange dreams. She was there and she had a personality already in existence. She was imperious, demanding and oddly emotionally sensitive. She spend most of the next day ignoring me. Then, that night, MA and this new tulpa, calling herself simply Queen, got into an argument. Queen left for a while, and came back a different person. She said she wanted to be a part of our tulpa family, and was willing to change to be a nicer person. We spent the following day working out a personality and history for her, and she now goes by Queen Arkay.

 

I don't really force my tulpa. Mostly I just talk with them inside my head at all hours of the day. MA's personality is largely an extension of my own, as fits his origins of seemingly breaking off my psyche. (Just writing this, I realize how crazy most of this stuff sounds.) His form is a humanoid wolf with dark, almost black fur. Queen is currently in something of a transition period between one personality and the next. Her form is a strange draconic-insectoid-alien blend from a sci-fi setting of mine.

 

A couple weird points about my tulpa. MA has access to all of my memories, and knows everything I know. Queen does not, and often requires basic concepts (like the seasons and directions) being explained to her. She can check my memories for information, but doesn't like doing so. We've done some experimenting with what they're capable of. MA has learned to help me fall asleep pretty effectively (which usually takes me a long time), although he's still working on numbing pain. We haven't done any work with imposition or possession beyond a few short trials.

 

A question for the community:

 

Can anyone else's tulpa access or not access their memories? I don't mean all their memories, like subconsciounsly stored ones, just the ones they themselves can access. MA can while Queen chooses not to.

[Akinkinit]

Noriko has always been able to access my memories whenever she feels like it. Sabari is able to as well, but at first she accessed my memories in a sort of continuous stream format. Like say one of them wanted to know what my favorite flavor of ice cream was. Noriko would just get the relevant bit of info (vanilla) from the memory banks. Sabari however would get vanilla, as well as the recent times I've had vanilla, my opinions on other flavors, what sort of things also have vanilla, etc. Like she didn't have as much control over it as Noriko did.

[Seeker]

A bit of good news here. We've been experimenting with possession a bit lately, mostly without luck. Until about ten minutes ago. I just got back from a walk, during which I had Mark-Antony try some basic possession stuff, like moving my eyes. Had a bit of success with that. We then tried to have me swap places with him, with some success.

 

After I got back, I was lying in my bed, and tried to have MA move my hand. I visualized my essence (as a gold-ish light) leaving my hand and arm and MA's dark grey essence moving in. I then tried to completely relax my hand, and MA moved it. It was just a simple up and down motion, but it was definitely not coming from me. This was a pretty exciting moment for us, as we've never had that clear of a possession success before.

 

Something unrelated I've been meaning to bring up. Each of my tulpa have designated locations within my head, MA at the left back and Queen Arkay at the right back (when she remembered to put herself there). This makes it easier to know who is talking to me, as their mindvoices sound the same right now. However, normally when one of them speaks to me my eyes twitch. The motions are in time with their words, and it's been like this for as long as I've had a tulpa (including back when I had a few accidentally created ones).

 

Does anyone else have physical reactions to their tulpa speaking with them?