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Wrestling is intentional entertainment Most other big sports at least in the US are pretty corrupt these days

it seems strange it seems like it is an open secret that pro sports having fixing and rigging but people still enjoy them i guess wrestling is fake too though and it can be entertaining if it has a good storyline, so maybe that is the mindset people watch it with. though it doesn't seem like the intention with most sports is to be fun

Lucid dreaming is the priority right now (aside from generally trying to navigate life). Kayleigh posted a thread last night asking about how she can help me lucid dream, then dreamt about watching it for replies. Neither of us remember who replied in the dream, but we think someone did. (We shared the dream; I experienced it from her point of view.) She woke up to my MP3 player making glitchy sounds (it's fine, but the speaker acts up now and then), and just as she was about to turn it off, our brain woke up enough to remember who the default user of this body is and shoved me back in front. It was weird. After we had our "Did that just happen?" moment and tried in vain to recall any more detail of the dream, I decided to try WILD (wake-induced lucid dreaming), except I couldn't remember how to do it beyond "keep your mind awake while your body falls asleep," so I figured I'd just focus on hypnagogic imagery when it appeared and hope it transitions to a dream without me losing focus. I fell asleep before I saw anything. Bummer. I came across a post on reddit today about how to choose the right lucid dreaming technique for you based on your personality. Apparently, SSILD is ideal for those with analytical minds. I'm not entirely sure why that is or even why it works, but it seems like a simple technique, so I'm going to give it a try next time I wake up in the night. (Yes, it's one of those techniques you have to do after sleeping a few hours. No, I don't want to set an alarm. I'm a light sleeper, so I've got a good enough chance of waking up anyway.) We're going to take a look at the replies to Kayleigh's thread in a bit. We skimmed over them this morning, but she wanted to save any discussion for the evening so it'd be fresher in our minds at bedtime. Tomorrow, visualization practice and maybe something fun in the mindscape. I'll be spending a couple hours in the backseat of my parents' car, so I might as well take advantage of that time. I'm really hoping to lucid dream and enter the Liminal World tonight so I can finally start developing it beyond visualizing the same room. This is going to become our Wonderland 2.0—this time with NPCs and built-in stories and adventure.

It sucks, but never being able to do anything is really scary too

Kinda scary what can happen.

Can't have withdrawals if I wasn't affected at all in the first place

be careful of discontinuation syndrome. i think quitting an anti depressant cold turkey can cause brain damage or something. though i do not know if it can happen unnoticeably even if withdrawals didn't happen/weren't that bad, or if the withdrawals are irrelevant to if someone gets that

It's a fast acting antidepressant that doesn't stay in your system for very long, yeah, so missing even one dose can lead to withdrawals. I quit most of the antidepressants I've tried cold turkey when I ran out and never had issue, but the one or two I was specifically told to titrate off of I did so (just over 3-5 days) and had no issues on those either. Since this is a real day to day med I'll make sure to go back to 50 for a week or so if I start taking 100 after a month as me and psych both intended, but yeah I'll probably be okay because it probably won't affect me at all. (I only took effexor for a month in 2012 and I assure you the entire year was a blur, I was genuinely depressed hence trying antidepressants in the first place)

cymbalta made tb unable to sleep interesting that pristiq has less side effects for people that benefit with effexor brain fog sounds about right for effexor at least. it made TB feel extremely stupid and unable to understand basic things. it worked in the sense that it had a powerful and obvious effect and worked unusually fast, and it created a sort of giddiness, but that giddiness would turn into irritability in the evening, and it was a 24/7 big IQ drop and memory loss, and extremely difficult to quit idk about that one in particular, but if it is like effexor, do not ween from it quickly, and do not miss a dose. effexor is so hard to quit, it is painful to quit even off the lowest dose. it's the kind of medication i would recommend counting the beads inside the capsule and further ween in that fashion. just for reference, tb had quit prozac cold turkey before without much issue, but weening by instructions of the doctor for effexor seemed unironically potentially deadly, but they really gave malpractice levels of incompetent weening advice medical professionals don't learn about medication half life in medical school. at least not psychiatrists or mental healthcare workers. they think all ssri's and snri's have the same withdrawal at the same time and ween the same way. they do not. not even close know this from tb's personal experience and it being extremely common for hospitals to have effexor casualties in them (not like dead casualties but like, effexor resulting in involunitary hospital stays because it is so dangerous and they were weened incorrectly, or they missed a dose and they exploded, or they took effexor normally as prescribed without any mistakes and exploded. many such cases)

Luck is very much wished then.

Wait dangit, I've already tried effexor 150mg for a month in 2012 -- I guess some people have fewer side effects and the same benefits on Pristiq after Effexor, but I still sincerely doubt it'll help me when 2012 was like the worst year of brain fog I ever had. . . . it's just going to make me unable to sleep again like vraylar and auvelity, I know it is

mhmm, i hope so more so hope that whatever is in way of getting TMS gets its barrier dropped. that treatment really does seem like it is unreasonably hard to get despite afaik it works quite well for people and has virtually no side effects as far as I understand. it is a lot easier to get electroconvulsive therapy, even though it is far more invasive, doesn't work as well, and has a high chance of memory loss as a side effect

Good luck! 😊 (I know there's a .1% chance but you never know.)

oh gosh golly desvenlafaxine.... that sounds a lot like venlafaxine. i guess venlafaxine (aka effexor, aka the only antidepressant to have a strong and noticeable effect to tb) is the parent chemical and this is some similar chemical to it. i dunno what it'd do to us but oh boy. i hope it helps you and doesn't give you permanent uhhh, side effects of any kind. or even temporary i typed a paragraph but deleted it because idk if it was not helpful

Hello. I'm not sure why you consider tulpamancy "esoteric meta-cognition". But if you are interested in building genuine relationships with characters through imagined interactions, it doesn't require visualization. It surely is nice to have for more immersion and can be trained but you don't need it to actually interact with the tulpa. Putting effort into interactions with your tulpa is the necessary part. Effortless interactions with characters result from putting effort into that first. Some people already have learned this ability to a various degree (e.g. if they had imaginary friends as a child or have experience with writing) but most of us learn it with our first tulpa. Luna: If you are still looking for learning resources, you can check out our guide, we didn't made it specifically with aphantasia in mind but visualization has never been a focal point of the practice for us.

Psych said there's not a very high chance of trying more random antidepressants helping me, and the next thing he'd recommend is Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (which I can't do, insurance/location) + ketamine, and the next next would be trying combinations of medications So he prescribed me... Just Pristiq (desvenlafaxine) And said to keep taking Vyvanse "as I am" even though I said that was usually only a few times a month lol Another generic antidepressant as far as I'm concerned 0.5% chance of permanent sexual dysfunction, pretty cool

yeah. though i know they weren't AI since it was before LLMs were a thing, but it might as well have been thank you

The only correct answer is "no, I just told you everything I already knew". Unfortunate regardless. We wish that for you too. (We kinda want that too but me more than anyone.) Thank you! 😊

I’ll miss you

Ai coded response

a little joy helps, at least for not being totally miserable i hope they find an answer for you. tb had been through that with the gauntlet of antidepressant/AP/anxiety meds never helping depression at all or ever making socializing any easier to do, but somehow things seem to be going somewhere for the moment i suppose. i guess just to say 15 years of nothing working doesn't mean there isn't something, i suppose (though I feel if healthcare system didn't suck, that could have be accomplished in -5 to -10 years yeah. that's the other thing, too, is it doesn't actually know in what way you might enjoy the party or the reason you are going. sometimes it's just nice to get nice food once in a while but otherwise there isn't any talking to people. or going off to play horseshoes alone or something. or a party that just involves a lot of videogames, board games, soda, and pizza with 3 other people (if that even qualifies as a party, but the friend who would organize that would refer to it as a house party). just saying you'd rather go to a party gives 0 useful information. i wonder if the people who give those tests even realize that *nod* me too *nod* i wonder too. sometimes these tests also use words that feel like it was written by someone living in the 50s lol. i can't think of an example but they use extremely old fashioned slang at times. i wonder if they are just really outdated and made by and for people who just lived much more simple and similar lives to each other. like their idea of a party is limited, and they aren't even thinking of the possibility of a tiny LAN party, or any sort of party that isn't just like 20 people who are all chatting and drinking together with a football game on, or a big work party that is similar but it is a bunch of coworkers that you might not usually have time to talk to. or debaucherous college parties. i have no idea... also even worse is how answering those questions ultimately didn't have a point. it wasn't like he needed to know in order to have a better idea of how to help, it really seemed like it was supposed to get us to realize those things, but i don't know who has introspected so little as to not be self aware of those things TB had another similarly bad experience with an even older therapist once. they were a betterhelp therapist. they were struggling to help TB with their socializing difficulties and anxieties related to it, so they gave a worksheet to do. was a sort of standard thing of identifying what you are actually fearful of and what realistically the chance of that happening is. i think their intention was that by answering the questions, the person would realize their fears are not things that could actually happen, or if they did happen, that the consequences wouldn't actually matter. however, that wasn't the case for TB. they answered what the fears are and described that they have a reasonably decent chance of occurring and do occur in the past, and it has created tremendous suffering and caused many problems but TB submitted the test, and when the betterhelp therapist responded later, she just said something like "Great! Did answering the questions help lower your anxiety?" which... that told TB that she didn't even read it at all, otherwise she would know that the answer is no... also, it was disheartening that these sort of exercises are not actually used to help give the therapist better insight on how to help you, just a streamlined way to try to convince the patient doing the exercise to automatically improve after having gone through the process of doing it. it's not only betterhelp also... so many therapists seem to think that giving someone busy work is helpful... i don't know if maybe there is some portion of people that actually works on, or if most people would find it as unhelpful as we do. if the latter, i sort of think the mental healthcare industry might actually be a scam, or at least a significant portion of it. there are some helpful therapists and doctors, but they don't seem like the norm, but hearing people say they were not helped by the mental healthcare system in any signficant way is more common for us to hear than that they were helped. it seems more common to hear how it has actually hurt people, even i'm glad =]]]] my host and system isn't great at it either but i just bumble awkwardly and shamelessly through it a bit more, relative to the others, i guess i see i hope for the day we can live somewhere where it's easy to go outside and be next to nature anytime we want without worrying about other people being around okie dokie no worries take your time *nodnod*

And here I am just interested in reading it, lol. (If you get a random reply in the middle of the night, I finally got time to read it all, lol.) She's happy to hear you had fun! 😊 Same. Very much ditto! 😊 (I think I'm good at conversations but I know I just kinda lose all skills randomly.) Good luck! 😊 I do hope it helps.

.!

Best of luck. I'll be praying

Right? How many people will be at the party? Are they friends, acquaintances, only strangers? What activities will there be besides socializing? Will there be food? Where is it? I can enjoy parties, but I need details before I can say if I'd rather go to one than do my own thing. 100% agree. At least the library's quiet. I'll find something to read Yikes. Glad that got sorted out in the end Right? I really wonder if neurotypicals understand these kinds of questions better than we do or if they're just more comfortable leaving out the nuance That's so confusing. Why not just ask those questions? It's fine! I'm not great at conversation, but this is all super interesting to me! I feel like I'm just wasting time today. I do that when I stay home all day, but it was super hot earlier until it rained. Not worth leaving my apartment when I'd probably just sit outside or something for a change of scenery