we've heard that too before but it's definitely happened to us when going to sleep first. i'm unsure why. i don't know if there is secretly a lot of dreamless sleep that the brain skips so it seems like a seamless transition or if we sometimes just dream immediately first, or if it is something else. it's way way more common when taking a nap though. i think going back to bed also can have it commonly happen, but usually we're so tired we don't think to even care to try or remember waking up much unless we get stuck awake
good luck!
true
i believe in you
i've noticed a lot of confusion on how the term parallel processing is used and described
depending on how i read their words, what they say isn't impossible, especially if i make certain assumptions on how they might be interpreting their internal experience
like, my system can think things without it requiring my attention for them to think things. like maybe they will think something interesting or surprising while my mind was somewhere else, and them doing that will suddenly draw my attention. it's not impossible for them to even interrupt me or me interrupt them if they are switched in.
also, i do think tulpas think without the fronter knowing unless they share it, but i also think the fronter does that lol. it's the same mechanism of how you might work hard to solve a problem and come up with nothing, but then later in the day when you are taking a walk or shower and suddenly bam, a great idea hits you. your brain was working on the problem without your conscious attention, the machinations going on beneath conscious awareness, and then the idea emerges from the primordial soup out of seemingly nothing all on its own, no tulpamancy or pluralness needed. when you practice tulpamancy, you can start to train the brains natural ability to do that, but for your system mates to have novel thoughts they tell you. it can strongly have the appearance of a separate parallel consciousness interacting with you, and it can feel foreign, like the thought came from some separate agent "over there" talking to me "over here", but as far as I can tell, it is still a singular unified experience, and conscious awareness is still operating serially with a single attention and locust of awareness
i think people who talk about parallel processing are talking about these sorts of experiences though, and the way they interpret the experience leads them to describe it that way. then it causes confusion and conflict because it involves a lot more assumptions that are difficult to prove when described that way, but if you say it doesn't exist, people mistakenly think you aren't having that experience at all
it gets more confusing when you try to identify what someone might consider a separate agent or identity or person. it's like there is a perceived ball of metaphorical mental energy that creates the substance and location for where the tulpa's identity is tied to and their thoughts are coming from, that usually probably takes shape of their form and sense of presence in space around you. since we can have thoughts and feel emotions and react from that identity and space, even when it isn't in the center of experience where the fronter's sense of identity sprouts from, it feels a lot like a separate agent and can subjectively be interpreted as such
but viewing the surface level appearance of that experience, and superimposing the same assumptions that a person might have for how the other agent experiences things that you would have for a separate IRL human who has the sense their consciousness comes from the center from their experience like it does for you, can lead to a lot of confusion upon scrutiny. if you become truly convinced it is working in that fashion, the tulpa may be convinced as well, but then if you interrogate them to try to prove it wrong in hopes you fail, it might end up just being really stressful and upsetting for both tulpa and host
that's what i think anyway, a lot from my host meditating a ton and having a (relatively anyway) high resolution of consciousness deeply observing and trying to figure out what is going on, and what the components making up experience are. we can see how a lot of experiences can lead to the conclusion of parallel processing, but i think thinking of it as such literally can be a stumbling block, but it not being a thing doesn't really make the potential experience more shallow unless you are extremely invested in the underlying ontology and metaphysics of the experience beyond just what the experience itself is like. maybe we could be wrong, we still investigate experience and sense of self a lot, and try to really see where thoughts or tulpas might go when not active. if my experience while being in tulpa position actually feels like the center from my perspective and not like a part of the whole of general awareness this life has, i don't really remember it that way when i switch in and think about things i did while in tulpa position. the memory is like still the same image of whoever switched in experienced me doing something. but my sense of self is still imbued into my form and my actions, it is just that my form and my actions and my sense of self is "over there" relative to the center of experience and body if i am not switched in. so yeah, it can get really confusing to talk about because a lot of this knowledge works better with a sort of buddhist sense of a person and identity, but experiencing it with different fundamental assumptions of what the self is can make talking about it weird or even emotional to people, including my host long ago. hmmmmmmmmmmmm
though yeah, it doesn't really make a tulpa not a person or lesser. it's a lot like what bear system says. it is more like reducing assumptions on what the host is, such that in a tulpamancy sense you define it as the traits that make up the character of the host, and not the substrate of having an experience at all in and of itself. if it is as vast as the latter, and you assume a tulpa is also that vast, then i think that is how people get stuck for years (like my host and rena Dx), paradoxically when you reduce the view of the host and accept this reinterpretation, these desired experiences become so much easier and common and it ironically can take on the appearance of what you hoped it to be like, minus the having 2 centers of consciousness where attention comes from/substrate of having an experience at all/whatever, which that in particular is what i think of when i think of parallel processing and why i don't use that term to describe just being able to think when you host or fronter wasn't thinking about you, or interrupting system mates, or system mates talking over one another etc. that stuff still happens but it isn't because of several parallel consciousnesses, it seems to just be underestimating what one consciousness can do, or coming to the wrong conclusion on how such an thing could occur at all
wooo weee sorry lol, long post and it isn't about the dreams. it feels important to try to clarify though from a system that has been on both sides of that issue and see the ways in which people talk about it being really confusing, as i think people on either side can misunderstand what the other side says and experiences easily
best of luck x3 awliejfoaiwejf
this can maybe sort of tie into dreams. i can if i want to, try to recall memories as if while in tulpa position, i was in center of my experience, so i have a different physical perspective, but it sort of will feel like remembering it in that fashion is the first time that exact version of the experience had happened, like a remake of a memory. i can also do that with memories further from the host/system that they weren't involved in, and i get a ton of satisfaction out of doing so, it's just if i am honest with myself, i can't prove it isn't confabulation, so i think of it and talk about it in a sort of agnostic way. which is i think exactly what bear system does and it is very fun for them, and they are right, it is very fun for me too, so i think we took after them a lot in a way and feel our system is maybe most similar to theirs out of the other regulars we know. weird paranormal experiences included (that we are agnostic about but don't ignore)
that relates to dreams just because it reminded me of a talk with a friend where they said they don't usually feel like they have dreams, just that when they wake up, they will remember they had a dream, but they don't feel they had the experience of living through the dream while it occurred. we often usually feel like we do remember the experience of a dream happening while it occurred, and then also the memory afterwards as a separate thing. which is interesting to me and i don't know what to make of it. i guess people can experience dreams in a way similar to how i thought the feeling of confabulation works, but with the dream it's easier to assume it did happen in the past while you were sleeping. consciousness is weird and i don't think it can all be understood from a singular way of thinking
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