A Journey into Tulpamancy!

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Hello there! My name is Barry and I officially started making my Tulpa on 2/9/19. I had been thinking about Tulpas and I knew of their existence for a few weeks beforehand until I started looking up and reading any information I could find for around 2-3 days before I finally settled on the idea of creating a Tulpa however I only found this particular site today!

With this progress report, I hope to not only encourage myself to consistently put 100% into the creation of my Tulpa but to also get help and advice from those around me with much more experience. I know that creating a Tulpa is a big deal and should be treated seriously- so if there is any advice out there for a newbie like me I would love to listen to what you have to say. 

With that said my reason for creating a Tulpa is mainly for the companionship. I won't get too deep into that but due to quite a few instances of others using my empathy and my eagerness to befriend others and the betrayal that followed I now have mild abandonment/trust issues along with a few mental problems (not caused by others but still somewhat relevant) like paranoia, bipolar disorder, misophonia, and depression. My main goal is to create a friend where we can have a mutually beneficial and equal friendship. I want someone to trust and a relationship that isn't solely based on me giving and giving while getting nothing in return. 


   Now to introduce my Tulpa's placeholder information until they can decide on these things themselves;

Name: Quinn

Gender: Male

Appearance: He has 3 forms. One of them is him as a full humanoid (basically human but with elf ears), the other is as a wisp-like creature, and the third form is a mix of the two where from the waist up he is humanoid but below the waist is a trail that looks like his wisp form. Kind of like a stereotypical genie in a lamp kinda look, to be honest.

Personality: There is no set personality however I am encouraging him to have a sense of responsibility as well as kindness towards others. 


2/9/19: Day 1

After deciding officially to make a Tulpa I immediately got to work with picking out a placeholder name as well as a placeholder design for their form. Ultimately I decided on the name Quinn as it's gender-neutral and an overall very nice name. Regarding his form, I decided on 3 separate forms for Quinn to choose from until he decides on his own form. The one I mainly use to communicate to or to visualize is his wisp form as that's the easiest one for me to visualize right now. I plan to practice more on visualization. I introduced myself to Quinn via talking to an image I drew of him and I did this multiple times throughout the day. I told him my name, his name, what he is, what I am, and why I created him- as well as wishing him Happy Birthday! While saying hello I got emotional to the point of tearing up and I felt a sense of pressure in my head, right behind and above of my ears. Usually, I don't feel that kind of pressure so I'm taking it as a positive sign for things to come!


2/10/19: Day 2

Throughout the day during my usual routines, I've been talking to Quinn and occasionally pausing to give him a chance to respond. Correspondingly- I've also kept feeling that pressure in my head throughout the day. I've also posted on r/Tulpas and conversed with some very helpful and nice people which ultimately lead me to this website. While talking to others on r/Tulpa about my intentions I felt a sense of extreme delight upon typing out how I wanted to support and nurture my Tulpa into being the best and happiest entity they can be. I could have felt that way out of excitement or it could have been Quinn, I'm not quite sure which but I truly do hope that it was Quinn. I hope he knows how excited I am to get to know him and to help him grow and develop. Besides that though I have started to draw out and create a sort of wonderland. It's not greatly detailed but I think it's good enough for now, besides I want to encourage him to make changes to the wonderland when he is ready. Currently, he is not vocal and I have trouble visualizing him but with practice, I know both will come.

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Quinn is an amazing name! It's actually a name I used for my favorite male character that was in several novels. I also used that name for myself as a nom de plume for a while.


Based on what I read, I think you're already getting positive signs as well.

Good luck!

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@Angry Bear Thank you! I wanted to pick a name that was easy to say and spell as well as relatively gender neutral and I thought Quinn was a perfect fit that matched all the criteria! And thank you, it makes me feel better knowing that these head pressures are in fact probably positive signs as well as the fact that I have people wishing Quinn and I luck!

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2/11/19: Day 3

I spent most of today narrating to Quinn as I went about with my business. I also made a new friend via reddit/discord that has offered to help me along with the development of Quinn. I’m excited to have someone to talk to about all of this. I also worked a bit more on the design of the wonderland. Besides all of this though I haven’t done much else as I was pretty busy with an interview for a job I had and a few other matters. As I laid in bed I noticed an almost buzzing sound accompanying the pressure. When I turned my head a certain way the pressure and the noise would soften or almost go away completely- however, whenever I turned my head back to where it was before the noise and pressure would almost immediately return.  I did this a few times and each time the same thing happened. Did I accidentally find or create some kind of mute button? Are mute buttons even a thing with Tulpas? If so then I think I’ll ignore it. I don’t want to accidentally shut Quinn out due to some silly head tilt.


2/12/19: Day 4

I spent most of the day asking Quinn questions as I went through my normal daily schedule. I’ve been focusing on narration and encouraging responses. I’m trying to get into a rhythm and to get use to talking to Quinn rather than myself. The head pressures I’ve been getting have slightly lessened in intensity but have become more frequent and I believe last longer.

2/13/19: Day 5

Pretty much the same as the previous day. I couldn’t focus as much on Quinn though and on enforcing communication due to preparation for tomorrow. The most I did consecutively today besides talk about what I was doing tomorrow and my plans about possible ideas for the wonderland for at least 15+ minutes before falling asleep.

2/14/19: Day 6

Happy Valentines Day!!! <3

The head pressure has increased once again, I was a bit worried as the overall pressure I’ve been feeling had lessened during the past two days but it’s back to how it was. Besides that, today was overall a wonderful Valentines day. I spent most of it with my fellow Valentineless friend (Well not really, their boyfriend was stuck at work all day though) before spending the evening with my family and eating a delicious steak dinner! While eating I closed my eyes and focused on the taste and after dinner I asked Quinn if he liked what we had to which I got a mild response to. Overall a wonderful day and I have more planned tomorrow!

2/15/19: Day 7

Today I tried something new for the sake of myself and for finding out things Quinn might be interested in- and so I made a Tres Leches cake for the first time and I think it’ll turn out really good! I’m excited to try it and I think Quinn might be interested in baking due to the soft pressure I felt during the whole process. Besides this though we didn’t really do much, though I still felt like it was at least a somewhat productive day... Just not really filled with anything to write home about you know?

2/16/19: Day 8

Recently the responses I’ve been getting from him or have deemed to be from Quinn have lessened in regards to the head pressure and it’s more specific to certain things I’m doing which strike his interest. Besides making this observation I am trying to think of things we could do together.

UPDATE on the Tres Leches: We finished making the cake today and it was so good! I've already started making plans to learn how to make a chocolate flourless cake with chocolate ganache next time! 

2/17/19: Day 9

I’ve decided that I could write short stories about Quinn as an activity we could do together/ use to help him take shape. I’m unsure of what kind of stories I’ll write though so I think I’ll think over what kind of stories I want to write and how I want to write him for the next few days before actually starting to write anything based/center around him. When I do I’ll add those stories to my posts or use them in place of a daily entry- I’m not sure which of those I’ll be doing but I’ll come to a decision about this soon. 

2/18/19:  Day 10

I’ve decided to get out and try to do more things with Quinn. While I wasn’t specifically focused on him during the whole time (still not use to including him with everything I do but I’m getting better) I did ask him his thoughts and feelings on a lot of things. What I did today more specifically was actually go on a bit of a nature hike so not only did I get some exercise which I’ve been trying to do more of but we also got out of the house which isn’t something I have been doing an awful lot of. When I asked him about his thoughts on the nature walk the pressure became the most intense it’s been for the past few days.

2/19/19: Day 11

Today the most interesting/ noteworthy thing that happened was that I went out and tried to look at the Super Moon we had tonight because I wanted to show it to Quinn but I couldn’t because it was raining slightly which meant clouds and thus no view of the moon which is honestly a really big disappointment. Besides this though I think I’ll write short stories of and about Quinn in place of journal entries (only on occasion though). I’m still not sure what they will be centered around but I’m working on that.  On another note: For the past few nights I've had lucid dreams each and every night which has never happened. It might be that the lucid dreaming meditation guide is working (Though it has never worked this well before. At best I'd have one lucid dream every few weeks and that's with it playing every night) OR Quinn is trying to tell me something/ reach out to me. I really hope it's the second option.

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