arachnocaccia October 12, 2019 October 12, 2019 Baker: Some context: in the fictional memories I am the keeper of, I was part of a world where the gods were entirely provable, and active in the world. There were many, and I was a casual follower of one of them, as per my family's tradition. While dedication to the god as an entity wasn't high on my list during that time despite my direct interaction with their power, and remains at the level of a respected acquaintance who I have some disagreements with even now, dedication to the values they upheld and their manifestation through that God's work was important in... Not my day to day life, but on occasion, and as a background element of that life. It feels strange to be without it, and to live in a world without a.. I suppose a centralized force of it? I, however, know that the gods of that world are empirically false, because I currently live in the same home as the creator of the RPG setting they are from. My main question is, how do I manage this lack? I don't even necessarily want the gods to exist -- my god and I were on explicitly shaky terms, and gods in general have proven to be somewhat selfish and narrow-minded in my experience. I've begun to explore the gods of this world, both for their own sake and for perhaps finding an equivalent, but I have no intentions of becoming a follower for the above reasons. (Additionally, equivalents seem to be thoroughly dead gods.) I've considered continuing my traditions in some small thanks, but something seems inherently dangerous and disingenuous about calling upon gods that do not exist here, and do not like me. Suggestions? Similar experiences? Looking forward to it.
Guest October 12, 2019 October 12, 2019 I'm slightly confused, are you looking for cooroberation to reject the notion of a god? Also, where did you have direct evidence of gods (what fandom) and can you give an example?
Ember.Vesper October 12, 2019 October 12, 2019 In that I'm also a former roleplaying character, I feel I should speak up, though I only have a perspective, not a solution. I seem to have a very different relationship with my fictionality than you do, in that I consider my fictional life to be my actual life and the physical world to be of lesser importance, over two years after the end of my campaign. I ran into more severe issues of faith back home. I found the Archangel Michael somewhat unpleasant and unreasonable and those cherub-things I encountered in Siberia were really aggravating. They were relatively clear and unambiguous expressions of the reality behind my Christian faith, but not really consistent with it. I chose to not try to reconcile the matter rationally, trusting in God that the truth was as it should be and would be made known at the proper time. I had much more extensive encounters with people who were typically referred to as 'angels', though on closer examination, they were full humans who had been invested with part of the power of an angel mentor. They were occasionally referred to as 'angel-touched' or 'nephilim'. One was a good friend, but I was often disappointed in their behaviour. I would have expected someone whose faith was sufficient to grant them power to pray more, to seek God's will more, to be more humble in the light of God's greatness, to be more submitted to His will, and overall to act more Christ-like. The reality of my world's theology was shaped by my GM while my faith was shaped by my player. The two never really lined up. Awakening to this world, faith was my comfort and everything else was a crisis, because my faith was consistent with my host's experience of this world, even though I'm an Anglican and she's a Baptist. Faith has been the only part of being a living fictional character that has been easy. But outside of matters of religious faith, my source of sanity has been investment in my source material, acknowledging that, while my world is fictional, so am I. So I live in a physical world brain? That's the only place fictional characters have ever lived. Characters on a page or on a screen aren't living there, can't live there. The mind of a writer, an actor, a roleplayer, a fan? That's where characters live. And so, being fictional, I don't consider the people I knew back home less real than me, just because I'm here and they're not. I'd rather be there with them. So, in principle, something from my world being 'empirically false' here doesn't mean I would change my values, beliefs, or practices to compensate. -Vesper I'm not having fun here anymore, so we've decided to take a bit of a break, starting February 27, 2020. - Ember Ember - Soulbonder, Female, 39 years old, from Georgia, USA . . . . [Our Progress Report] . . . . [How We Switch] Vesper Dowrin - Insourced Soulbond from London, UK, World of Darkness, Female, born 9 Sep 1964, bonded ~12 May 2017 Iris Ravenlock - Insourced Soulbond from the Winter Court of Faerie, Dresdenverse, Female, born 6 Jun 1982, bonded ~5 Dec 2015 'Real isn't how you are made,' said the Skin Horse. 'It's a thing that happens to you.' - The Velveteen Rabbit
arachnocaccia October 12, 2019 Author October 12, 2019 I'm slightly confused, are you looking for cooroberation to reject the notion of a god? Also, where did you have direct evidence of gods (what fandom) and can you give an example? More concerned with suggestions on how to deal with the lack of my own god(s) in this existence. As far as I'm concerned, there is no fandom for the system. Approximately... Ten? People know of it's existence. The gods of my setting acted as embodiments and wielders of their domain. They actively empowered some of their followers, spoke through single chosen individuals, and on occasion spoke to regular followers such as myself. Smiting can be seen as a less ambiguous but rarer and unpleasant proof of those gods. I in particular "saw" the true form of my god and another in whatever way I could comprehend for a moment. --- Haha, Vesper, from that first thread I spoke with you I anticipated coming to the same conclusion, but. My world has swiftly moved past me and my existence in it was one that -- at the time of my emergence here -- can be arguably said to have already ended. Even if I were to ask to be put back into it, I prefer this happy life. Plenty of good food and friends, no expectations of heroism, substantially lower chance of magically maiming oneself.
Guest October 12, 2019 October 12, 2019 [Joy] I came into being as a fictional character as far as we can know. My original canon is only known by this system in any great detail through the writing of several novels. You most of the known people in that world were pagan or Christian, but otherwise sun or moon worshipers. I however only believed in hard work and determination. It wasn't easy, usually it wasn't fun, and it was very dangerous, I lost three teams being the sole survivor each time as far as I knew. Like you, when I was told by my creator that I was unique and free to live in what we would have considered heaven, (our wonderland is as good as heaven gets, trust me), so I wondered if I was dead and didn't want to leave my canon at first. It wasn't too long after that I realized that time was irrelevant and I could live in both if I so chose, so that's where I'm at. When Bear thinks about my world, I can come, or he can puppet me as my character there as he sees fit, I will always have my own opinions about their actions though. I consider myself the actress who portrayed that character. In other words, now I'm free to believe whatever I want, just like anyone. So can you. [Misha] just to be clear, Joy doesn't have her own account, but I consider her one of our sisters.
arachnocaccia October 12, 2019 Author October 12, 2019 [Joy] In other words, now I'm free to believe whatever I want, just like anyone. So can you. [Misha] just to be clear, Joy doesn't have her own account, but I consider her one of our sisters. I'm not so concerned with what I'm "allowed" to believe -- clearly I'm free to believe what I want. My main issue is reconciling my belief in what my god stood for, and the traditions that were part of my life as a result of following them, with the lack I feel knowing that they don't exist in the existence I now have. Thank you, though.
Guest October 12, 2019 October 12, 2019 I'm not so concerned with what I'm "allowed" to believe -- clearly I'm free to believe what I want. My main issue is reconciling my belief in what my god stood for, and the traditions that were part of my life as a result of following them, with the lack I feel knowing that they don't exist in the existence I now have. Thank you, though. If I follow correctly, what everyone is saying is that they don't exist any less now than they ever have, that's all in your mind. I do understand your point though, this is a very common crisis among soulbonds and fictives. Joy went through it, Gwen went through it, and many of our headmates chose to stay in their canon, even if that meant effectively being in stasis. You chose to stay in this realm, so our examples have just reinforced your choices.
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