shitty life of deth

[urmom is beautiful]

I used to be a tulpamancer and a student learning programming.  I have almost no social life and try to deal with the bad stuff out there. Therefore I created tulpa with the purpose of being a sex puppet, the number of servitors in the system is increasing and it makes me tired of cleaning them up.  I threw them away and found out I was a disgusting pervert.  I can make a tulpa wife but I fear that I will turn them into sex dolls again.  I want to be in a relationship with a woman but I am afraid that I will see her as a sex doll, my genital problems are bad, my time spent at work is too much.  The pressure was great and I turned down any opportunities I got, I was scared of them.  I feel lonely every time I sleep though, I dream about this often and it's really annoying.

Edited July 14, 2023 by urmom is beautiful

[Luminesce]

You sound like you need to see a therapist, not tulpas. If you're not able to be comfortable in your own mind, that's a problem for a professional to help you with, not a tulpa, nor us.