Sprinkles257's Tulpa Journal

[Sprinkles257]

Hello, everyone! I'm Sprinkles, and I posted on the general forum once before. Relevant info: I'm a young adult, I'm a college student, and my interests include creative activities and video games. I also have a significant fascination with plurality, especially created plurality, which is why I'm here! I'm a singlet, but I'm interested in exploring tulpamancy to stretch my creative muscles, to explore the limits of the mind, to have companionship, and to explore parts of my identity that I can't express on the outside (introspection). I initially had some reservations about trying tulpamancy out for myself, and I usually just watched from afar. However, I am willing to give this a try, and I want to see where it goes (if I'm successful). Nice to meet you all!

I haven't gotten any sort of response yet, but I do have a basic idea of what I'd like my tulpa to be like. Of course, I know that this could change later on, but it's good to have a base, right? So, my first entry will simply be describing my tulpa.

~~~

NAME: Benji

GENDER: Male(ish)

PRONOUNS: he/him to start with, but others may come along.

SPECIES: Humanoid alien

PERSONALITY: Kind, curious (always eager to learn), patient, cautiously optimistic, interested in the arts and sciences, formal, occasionally awkward

As for personality, I recently did a writing activity where I pretended to write as my tulpa to get a feel for what he would be like. Based on what I wrote, I tried to compress it into the description above. When I was first getting started and looking into tulpamancy, I also made this description for him:

Benji - tulpa - adult - loves science fiction, reading, writing/recording, and learning about the world. Can be a bit awkward, but very sweet and loving. Very loyal, as well. Passionate about his interests. He is an alien who loves humans and admires them like a human would admire a particularly beautiful or unusual flower. Also, he actually likes flowers (especially hydrangeas and lavender).

APPEARANCE: Blue eyes, medium-length brown hair, glasses, freckles, often wears blue/purple/gray, has slight fangs. Benji looks a lot like a masculine version of me, except I have brown eyes. I did a Picrew to approximate how I imagine him (from https://picrew.me/en/image_maker/2384161):

 

[a937539]

Sounds like your off to a great start. Benji sounds cute. 

The greatest luck to you.

[Sprinkles257]

2 hours ago, a937539 said:

Sounds like your off to a great start. Benji sounds cute. 

The greatest luck to you.

Thank you! I’m glad you think so, and I appreciate the encouragement. :)

[TurboSimmie]

Welcome!!! 😁 Benji sounds wonderful! 🥰 It really sounds like you are off to a good start--writing or speaking as/for your tulpa (which was call "parroting") is actually a useful tool early on, and it will help Benji form his identity and personality. 😊

[Sprinkles257]

2 hours ago, TurboSimmie said:

Welcome!!! 😁 Benji sounds wonderful! 🥰 It really sounds like you are off to a good start--writing or speaking as/for your tulpa (which was call "parroting") is actually a useful tool early on, and it will help Benji form his identity and personality. 😊

Hi there, thanks for the welcome! I really appreciate hearing that my approach is okay, and I'm glad you like my description of him as well. ^^

Edited December 13, 2024 by Sprinkles257

[Sprinkles257]

From December 15th: I talked to Benji for a short time. I've seen many people suggest simply talking about your life or daily activities, so that's what I did. I told my tulpa what I did that day and what I planned to do in the near future. I also thought it may help to tell him about myself so he knows what to expect if/when he becomes responsive, so I mentioned some parts of my personality and upbringing. At the end, I took some time to discuss what I hoped to get out of our relationship. Ultimately, I hope we can be each other's "two halves of one whole". I hope we can reflect each other, but also have our differences that make things interesting. Above all, I hope we can be positive influences on each other.

I'm still not sure when tulpa is "supposed" to become responsive, and I've seen some pretty varied results. I'm still trying, though, even if it feels a bit like I'm talking to the wall right now, haha. I just wanted to give this brief update.

[Sprinkles257]

From December 20th: I have talked to Benji a few more times. Today, I tried to do some personality forcing by repeatedly saying what characteristics I wanted him to have. I focused on positive traits because that's what I've seen other people advise. I said, "You are smart, kind, curious, patient, and loving" several times. I also described some things that Benji may like to do when he's more active, what he could be for me, and what I could be for him. I've read that acting as if your tulpa is already fully "real" helps with development, so although it may be hard, I will try my best to get into that mindset. I want Benji to feel safe and comfortable enough to respond, and I want him to be able to ask questions if he has any.

Lastly, I did a simple response exercise. I would ask a question out loud, answer it in my mind, and respond as if Benji was the one who said it. I'm starting off with very simple and straightforward questions so I can get a better concept for his voice. I looked at objects around the room and asked, "What color is [x]?" I would answer in my mind, and then I would add, "Yes, that's correct, good job." I don't know if this is a good approach, but I'm not sure of how else to get that question/response pattern going.

Here is a brief list of tulpamancy goals I have:

- Improve on visualization so I can consistently imagine Benji's facial expressions and body movements. Right now, I'm having trouble with visualizing and forcing at the same time. I can speak, and I can get a feel for Benji's appearance in my mind, but it's difficult for me to do both. I'd like to work on this.

- Try to develop a mindspace/wonderland. I think that's the term? In any case, in the beginning stages, I think this would be helpful. It would feel slightly less awkward than talking to Benji wherever I happen to be physically. 

- Do more question/response exercises so I can get Benji's voice down. It may also help to imagine that he's reading something along with me.

- Overall, try to be more consistent with forcing and do it more often. This is important because, if I'm being honest, I tend to be a bit forgetful. I think it would help if I had a schedule of some sort, but I'll have to figure out how to fit that in with daily activities.

If anyone else has advice on how to establish a "mindvoice" or get some responses from a tulpa, please let me know. I'm open to suggestions!