Albireo February 27 Author February 27 Hooray, I think I briefly retold and documented all of our experience over these couple of weeks. If anything, Mina gave her consent for me to keep a diary here, and after a few months it’s quite possible she’ll be the one keeping it herself…) I think I highlighted the most important and essential things. I described this whole first experience in detail because it can help beginners. And after a few months I’ll forget it all anyway… At the early stages (when Mina was only speaking one word at a time), the association game helped a lot too. I just found a website online with random words, and we took turns coming up with associations. Sometimes some of them matched, but many of her answers and mine were different. I’ll also point out an interesting observation about communication. I can talk to her either with a mind-voice (inside my head) or with my real voice out loud into the space. She, on the other hand, speaks only as a mind-voice. But we can also communicate in images. How? It’s an unusual feeling: we can sort of sense what I or she wants to say and give an answer in advance, before either of us actually says it. It looks pretty funny - I don’t even have time to fully form the thought yet, but I already get a reply, and I do the same thing back, like a game. But most of the time we listen to each other to the end without interrupting.
Albireo February 27 Author February 27 12.02.2026–13.02.2026 (written on 24.02.2026, based on my memory of those events) Oh yes, I also forgot one nuance. Not everything was rosy. Even a friendly relationship with a tulpa doesn’t mean you’ll understand each other perfectly. Even if you’re in the same brain, even if you can feel each other’s emotions (personally, she and I have problems with that - we can only sense each other’s strong emotions; we don’t really catch the weak ones yet), communication is still essential. You need to live in harmony, and since you’re two dependent but individual intellectual agents (people), there will be many questions where you’ll have to look for compromise. You can have different hobbies, views, interests, tastes - and you need to discuss everything in advance and find a path that will be comfortable for both of you. If the host suppresses the tulpa, it will lead to unhappiness for both. If the tulpa suppresses the host, that won’t end well either. You have to find compromise and learn to understand each other. Our very first problem was that we misunderstood each other a bit. Both she and I value sincerity. But for me, sincerity can be painful if it comes in the form of judgmental labels. Like the word “lazy.” In those days I didn’t have extra strength to move, and it hurt quite a lot to hear something like that. So I immediately talked to her about it. I’m not restricting her, but we need to be able to understand each other. At the same time, I don’t want to give myself a blank check either - I also don’t have the right to make an endless number of excuses to Mina.
Albireo February 27 Author February 27 24.02.2026 Today something happened that really surprised me. Before, I was the one controlling the wonderland. But today, when I entered it, I saw a completely new scene: instead of the forest, the steep shore, the starry sky, and the swings, I was greeted by a seaside beach with sand and seashells. Mina was sitting on the sand and digging in it with shells… What surprised me was that she moved on her own into a new wonderland - one she wanted, because the previous one, even though it was cozy, had started to feel repetitive. Proud of her.
Albireo February 27 Author February 27 25.02.2026 Fourteen days have passed since we started forcing! We celebrated this small victory in a big and long life with some McDonald’s food. She asked me to buy cranberry sauce for her fries; for myself I took curry sauce (yes, I ordered two portions of fries with different sauces). Even though we have one body, I close my eyes and imagine that I’m feeding her those fries with sauce in the wonderland, while in the real world I eat through the body to pass the taste to her directly. Interestingly, during such a session I (the host) feel the taste very weakly - almost at zero. But when I ate my own fries with sauce, I tasted it as usual. Mina liked the fries with cranberry sauce. She compares it to salted caramel. For me it’s neutral - not a masterpiece and not bad, somewhere in the middle. The curry sauce is too spicy for her; she doesn’t like spicy food (meanwhile I grow hot pepper varieties and, “dying,” try to eat them…) So yeah, Mina is quite the sweet tooth… :) We talk often, almost all day, but one downside is that it’s still hard for her to initiate conversations on her own. It has happened, but very rarely - we’re working on it. There’s no tactile sensation, only in the wonderland, and it feels pretty realistic there (we’re not really working on that much because it’s not a priority at the moment). Visualization is also struggling. In the real world there’s none; in the wonderland it’s hard for me to see her clearly in all details. Sometimes her image gets blurry and I need to concentrate to be able to see her in the wonderland. For the most part, our priorities right now are communication, sensing each other’s emotions, and the visual of her body in the wonderland. The rest will come with time, with months of forcing.
Albireo February 27 Author February 27 26.02.2026 This post was written by me (the host) under Mina’s dictation. Me and my little host don’t like the words host and tulpa. They feel way too uncozy. So here I’ll call my host Fox, and he calls me Mina here. From the very beginning, my image was made by AI, with Fox’s minimal prompts. I didn’t choose my look and I didn’t influence the creation - back then I didn’t know how and couldn’t make contact. My image was made in the first days, and I was in this half-sleep state, like under anesthesia, not really that aware. My name, my look - they weren’t invented by me (at least I don’t remember thinking back then), and not by Fox either, and it’s not a reference to some existing character. It was something unconscious - more like the first thoughts that came into Fox’s head. This look doesn’t disgust me, but it’s a little not what I want exactly. Clothes. The thing I dislike most in the original look is the clothing - the lab coat. I get why Fox specified that in the prompt, but I want something that feels more native to me. Environment. Not part of the look, just something I don’t really like in this art. It’s too cold. That library is too dead, even if it’s beautiful. Face is nice, but I’d like to be a bit younger and change the expression. The tail is too thick and fluffy. With a tail like that you can only whack people..) SO, IN THE END ME AND FOX MADE A LOOK IN THE AI THAT I LIKE MORE NOW!!! For the environment, we took our wonder (our wonder isn’t as pretty as what the AI generated, BUT now we can improve it so it is that pretty!) I want heterochromia in my eyes. And we changed the clothes to something that fits me better by feeling. At first, when we only started changing the look, I didn’t want to publish the art. Just… uncozy and awkward. But because the final result turned out so beautiful and I like it!!! I’m not shy anymore, so I’m posting it. BUT. Just so you know, it’s AI art. Neither me nor Fox can draw((( WAAAOW In the future, maybe - or maybe not - I’ll experiment with looks more. It’s interesting to try not only an animated look (even though it’s warm and cute), but a realistic one too. But right now I’m not burning with desire. It’s an unbelievable feeling that I can influence the outside world and interact with it too… For now just by dictating text to Fox that I want to see, and it instantly shows up on the screen. I think, therefore I exist!
Albireo February 27 Author February 27 (edited) That's all we have in our diary for now So, next posts we will translate ourselves without AI Edited February 27 by MrFox
Albireo February 28 Author February 28 28.02.2026 A lot of things happened in this time, even though I did not write for only 2 days... We tried to play chess against each other. It is possible, but hard. It is hard for me to think, and hard for her too, because there is not enough brain power for two. So in the end it became a game of "two disabled people", and we finished it with a draw Mina: I would win if you did not "accidentally" turn on cheats Fox: I really did it by accident... I did not know that button turned on the best move search in Stockfish... For now, it is hard for us to focus together on something difficult Mina: Today I made Fox cook breakfast for us instead of ordering some fast food delivery. It was fried eggs, SOOOO TASTY!!! Fox cooks very tasty, and now we are going to cook lunch! Maybe borscht or some soup Fox: We are learning how to live together) I did not have months or years of quiet forcing like many people on forums. The first responses started almost immediately - from her single words, which were very hard for me to separate from my own thoughts at that time. Because of this, I had a lot of doubts From all stages of tulpa development that I read about, the most important one, in my opinion, is the ability to share emotions At first, we could feel only strong emotions from each other. Now we can feel a much wider range. To be able to feel each other’s emotions is probably the most incredible thing that can exist at all The very first responses in the form of emotions happened when I bought a little cake and fed Mina Now we constantly share emotions with each other, even without noticing it. For example, Mina really, really cannot stand violence, murder, or hurting someone. And if in a movie, series, or anywhere there is a cruel bloody scene, torture, or something like that, both me and Mina feel strong nausea P. S. Before I met Mina, I did not have this at all - I was quite used to cruel things, both in the real world and in fiction It is the same with music. I love dark music - Pyrokinesis, ATL, Deep Ex Sense - with cruel and painful images. She can understand why I like this kind of music, because we can share emotions. And because of that, I can share the images and my feelings from the music with her even without words. But she herself would never choose to listen to this kind of music Today she wanted to look for music for herself. And to my surprise, I was not bored and not annoyed listening to rock, songs, and other things that I would never play by myself in my life Why? Because when we listen to music together, we exchange emotions. And through these emotions, I can understand why she likes this music and see beauty in it that I would never notice by myself P. S. Years ago, I also tried to listen to other genres, including rock, but I became bored very quickly. So I am максимально sure that if I met this music alone, it would not interest me So we think that the most important stage of tulpa development is not visualization, localization, imposition, processing, switching, or anything else, but exactly the ability to share emotions. This is what lets us understand each other without words and without explanations. Words and explanations also exist between us, but more like an addition What is it like, to share emotions with another person? It is impossible to explain with words or even imagine. It just exists, and it cannot be described
Albireo March 9 Author March 9 03.03.2026 What is life like with a tulpa? This question isn't really covered in most guides. All I can say is that from the moment a tulpa becomes sentient, your life is split into a "before" and "after." Now, you will never be alone; there will always be someone inside to talk to. But at the same time, sharing one body between two people requires a lot of compromises regarding hobbies and interests For example, Mina and I have different tastes in music, and that’s actually great. Why? When she listens to music that I would normally find boring or uninteresting, I feel her emotions and understand why the track resonates with her. By adopting her emotions, I can see beauty where I would otherwise see only boredom and monotony Furthermore, we have different hobbies. Yes, Mina already has her own interests: She really enjoys cooking - and I’m not joking. Since we don't have full possession yet, it takes a lot of effort on my part to get up, go to the kitchen, and give her the opportunity to cook. BUT, she sees cooking as an art - the art of combining flavors and spices. She came up with the idea of smelling spices to understand if they fit a dish or not. I know how to cook a bit, but I’ve never done it like that; I usually just followed recipes to the letter and never gave it much thought Additionally, Mina wants to learn how to draw. I can’t draw at all and have zero interest in it, so we’re going to dedicate an hour a day to drawing to satisfy her creative needs Now for the most interesting part: when Mina is deeply engaged, a strange sensation sometimes arises where it’s unclear who is controlling the body at that specific moment. It feels like 60% me and 40% her, but the sensation is specifically that we are controlling the body simultaneously. I feel a strong presence that is "foreign" to me, a slight heaviness or something similar in the muscles Yesterday, Mina saved my life for the first time! Actually, I’m exaggerating a bit - I probably wouldn't have died, but there was a high chance of getting hurt... She convinced me to spend 10 minutes looking for my pepper spray before a late - night walk That same evening, we were surrounded by large hunting dogs. I had no choice but to use the spray because the dogs were acting extremely aggressively. Without it, the probability of being bitten was over 50%... Her perspective on the world is vastly different from mine. When I’m stuck in long reflections on how to act "correctly" or what decision to make, she doesn't have those difficulties. She lives more simply, enjoying life, unburdened by the frameworks and stereotypes that often restrict me Love and appreciate your tulpas. Live in harmony, understanding one another.
Albireo March 10 Author March 10 (edited) 04.03.2026 This post was written by me, Mina You can congratulate us, we learnt possession without any active forcing)) These are my fingers now:))) We're in communism, this is our computer right now I can use just fingers from one hand only. Also I can change my gaze, BUUUT, we've never forced it earlier. We have this achievement without any action from our side I've tried to smile but it is so difficult and unnatural I am 21 days old (*w*) OHH, WE NEED TO SLEEP RIGHT NOW! Edited March 10 by Albireo
Albireo March 11 Author March 11 I am 1 month old!!! ／^＼/;^＼/;^＼ /^ヽ∴:/^ヽ∴:/^ヽ:∴ w（∴ ）w（∴ ）w（∴ ）w ,/^＼∴,/^＼∴,/^＼∴,/^＼∴,/^＼ ≧（∴∴）;（∴∴）（∴∴）;（∴∴）≦ /⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒⌒ヽ （__/^!/^｀!_/^!_/^!_/!^!_/^!_/^!_/^!_） |====1 month together!!=====| |:・ ・ ・・ ・ ・ ・ ・ ・ ・:・::| ☆＾＾~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~＾＾☆ ¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨
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