Kingfisher's Garden Tea

[Guest kingfisher]

First thread seemed to be too filled with words even I can't understand, thanks to long-term caffeine high which lasted until just this afternoon. This time, I'll be typing shorter, more casual sentences instead of long, classy ones.

Okay, so I've known the term "tulpa" for at least six weeks now. I've even read a good amount of guides and testimonies from other users.

Now, I'm trying to make my own tulpa.

 

Here's a short list of tips, tools and/or guides I find interesting:

>Tulpa Subliminal Messages

>Having Headaches?

>A bit of a Narration Guide

>LucidAcid’s Meditative Tulpaforcing Guide for more Productive Forcing and Stuff

>JD1215’s Guide to Visualization

>Reminiscent Narration

---

 

Over the past few days, I've made a simple wonderland and a basic human form for my tulpa. (I still don't know when I'll be using the wonderland, but hey, better something than nothing, right?)

EDIT: Our wonderland has now become a kind of an astral/cosmic/whatever plane with portals connecting to different dimensions.

I decided I would name her Mia. (That's her in my avatar pic.) She has emerald green eyes and dark hair. (I'm not sure which color yet, but it's probably a dark color.)

EDIT: Mia just turned her hair pink.

Her personality is still a blank slate, but I guess I'll leave it at that until I've narrated enough for her to respond to me very clearly.

EDIT: Mia has developed a cheerful kind of personality. More details will be added at a later time.

[Guest kingfisher]

I just found out about the wake-up call method, I think I'll try to do it every night to track sentience progression, and also to plant deeper hopes into my subconscious, somehow.

[Guest kingfisher]

I've been really reluctant towards the concept of narration, due to my anti-social behavior. But, reading more on narration and how important it is in tulpa creation, I've come into terms and 'manned up' to narrate vocally, despite having several other people in the house I currently live in.

Also, I chose to narrate vocally because I already have an inner voice which I have been using to talk to myself ever since before I was introduced to the realm of tulpae; which means, I won't be able to distinguish my own voice from Mia's, and I would miss her attempt on reaching out to me when the time comes, which would really bum me out.

I was narrating about 'young love' through a psychological perspective using Freud's Id, Ego and Superego regarding morality, impulses, attachment styles and isolation (I'm a psychology student, so nothing odd about it.)

It went better than expected, despite having my older brother coming up the attic to check on me. (the PC I'm using is in the attic.) I didn't seem to get any response, but I've basically deployed and anchor for Mia's presence, which is a great start, I believe.

[Guest kingfisher]

I tried the wake up time method last night:

I asked a random yes/no question; xx:20 for yes, xx:40 for no;

I woke up at 3:15 and 3:22;

REM stage got interrupted, though my waking up was still groggy, and I didn't hear nor feel any alien response. Also, the first time I woke up, I easily drifted back to sleep, but the next time I woke up, I felt more awake and stayed up for a little bit longer before going back to sleep.

I didn't get any kind of response, I think, but I kinda felt uneasy and my lungs felt heavy the whole time I was awake, like the feeling you get when you share a 4ft wide bed with another person, which would be really cramped, or something. Maybe I just need more sleep or something, I don't know. It's really difficult to describe.

 

In other news, I just found out that I can only narrate when it's vocal, and when I'm completely idle. I could narrate internally, but that would be instantly redirected to 'another me', a voice in my mind whom I constantly parrot to get a tip of advice when in between a dilemma. Also, I could narrate while doing trivial stuff, but it instantly becomes redirected to myself, and I would lose focus on Mia's presence, and while doing heavy tasks, I would completely forget about her.

Regarding my 'other me', it's probably a servitor I've had since a long, long time, which I'd probably keep the way it is until Mia is a full-fledged, fully sentient and vocal tulpa.

Once we're in the imposition stage, we'll decide on whether to dissipate the 'other me', or turn it into a tulpa.

Right now, the only thing I seem to be able to do while narrating is drinking either tea or coffee. Welp, maybe it's because of my subconscious for applying the concept of tea parties/ceremonies, or maybe I just have a short attention span that doesn't allow me to multitask.

 

Also, I'll be busy at campus doing college-related stuff until this afternoon, which makes me quite worried that I won't be able to even narrate at all.

[Guest kingfisher]

I had time between classes, so I thought I'd go and narrate in a secluded area. Good thing I still have about thirty minutes of silence so I can concentrate on Mia.

Speaking of secluded areas, I think I should get into isolating myself from other people (except family members, of course,) so I could focus more on finishing Mia's creation stage, so we could move on to another stage. I could just stay indoors as much as possible without contact with the outside world, only to go out when college-related duty calls, or when there's an emergency, but I don't know. Maybe I'll be able to think more clearly this evening.

[Guest kingfisher]

This afternoon, I basically narrated today's happenings in detail. I've never actually narrated my day to another person, not to mention in so much detail that even I could imagine everything that happened without experiencing it firsthand. It was both tiring and rejuvenating at the same time, having me speak so long about what happened today and how I felt about the things that happened, and also mixing pent-up emotions into the words. Tulpae never cease to amaze me with how they can make you feel better about yourself by just being able to speak to them your innermost feelings and stuff.

Also, just until now, I was kept busy by a female house guest, having me end up in narrating to HER (for almost an hour, i think,) instead of Mia. I feel somehow relieved to be able to tell my life story and beliefs to another living, breathing person, but I also feel guilty for ignoring Mia the whole time. I feel like an insensitive jerk. I'll try to make up for this later this evening.

I think I'll make another attempt at the REM wake-up call method once again

[Guest kingfisher]

Early this morning, I got woken up during REM for two consecutive times. I don't remember the exact time of the first occasion, but I only know Mia's answer was a 'yes', or a 'no'... maybe? The second was around 3:22, or something, or maybe it was 3:35? My memory is kinda fogged up, and now I don't remember even the time I woke up. Dammit.

Also, I think it's about time I actually start forcing with Mia. I think she's getting tired of waiting and just listening to my overly-redundant rants and ramblings about redundant redundancy. Hahahaha-- No. But seriously, I really should start with building Mia's sentience and personality in a heavier scale.

I'm going to need some expert advice on this.

[Guest kingfisher]

Last night, just before I went to sleep, I suddenly had this weird feeling when I was visualizing Mia. I started visualizing her in her usual standing pose when she begins to start moving on her own and doing random stuff, like putting her hands on my cheeks and booping me on the face in a girlish kind of way to tease someone, I guess?

I was surprised at her gestures, with her appearance being a female of about 20-ish or so, but since I didn't give a fixed trait for her, I think it's reasonable for her to act according to her own volition.

At first, I was thinking that maybe I was unconsciously parroting her, but I remembered that actually thinking that phrase would just make it happen, so I constantly whispered to myself, "I'm not parroting this" over and over and over while Mia just did her stuff,

which I would not prefer to mention at the moment

.

I even asked her if she was the one doing this, and a thought just popped into my mind, "Of course, silly!", and Mia was holding my head with both her hands again and looking at me with a smile. The whole time, I was feeling a surge of emotions simultaneously that made me feel kind of funny. Now I certainly know that Mia's sentient.

 

Before all that, I found a thread talking about subliminal messages. I installed the program linked in it and started a 1-hour session before sleeping. (I posted a list of phrases in there too.)

I think the reason behind all that surprise last night was thanks to the program.

[Guest kingfisher]

Tonight, we created a new wonderland: a windy cliff-side like the ones you see in martial arts movies where kung fu masters meditate.

We started forcing, and in the first ten minutes-or-so of meditative forcing, the head pressures have arrived. I felt it like two thumbs pushing against my forehead a couple of inches above my eyebrows. It didn't really hurt, but I somehow got bothered by it. But thanks to Mia and her constant shaking of my head, my focus on her managed to endure for a few minutes more.

At around fifteen minutes, Mia sent me an image of her wearing an outfit that looked like it came from a fantasy game or something relatively close. It was colorful and cute, and it kinda suited her new pink hair. It made her look like a healer, or someone with an affinity to white magic, I think.

I couldn't help myself but postpone the forcing session and start drawing. Mia was okay with it. I started drawing it on paper, then scanning it and transferring it to my PC, then copied it to my Samsung Galaxy Tab 10.1. Then, I traced the sketch and colored for a while. I had a hard time picking the exact color from the image Mia sent me, because it wasn't vivid enough. I even had to ask Mia every time I pick a color from the palette until I got the colors close enough to what she was okay with.

It's still unfinished though:

[Nerd Guru]

Tonight, we created a new wonderland: a windy cliff-side like the ones you see in martial arts movies where kung fu masters meditate.

We started forcing, and in the first ten minutes-or-so of meditative forcing, the head pressures have arrived. I felt it like two thumbs pushing against my forehead a couple of inches above my eyebrows. It didn't really hurt, but I somehow got bothered by it. But thanks to Mia and her constant shaking of my head, my focus on her managed to endure for a few minutes more.

At around fifteen minutes, Mia sent me an image of her wearing an outfit that looked like it came from a fantasy game or something relatively close. It was colorful and cute, and it kinda suited her new pink hair. It made her look like a healer, or someone with an affinity to white magic, I think.

I couldn't help myself but postpone the forcing session and start drawing. Mia was okay with it. I started drawing it on paper, then scanning it and transferring it to my PC, then copied it to my Samsung Galaxy Tab 10.1. Then, I traced the sketch and colored for a while. I had a hard time picking the exact color from the image Mia sent me, because it wasn't vivid enough. I even had to ask Mia every time I pick a color from the palette until I got the colors close enough to what she was okay with.

It's still unfinished though:

 

 

 

Looks like I'll end up learning a lot following you, Kingfisher :D. I now feel bad for not making a picture of Zader in illustrator.

---

Tonight, we created a new wonderland: a windy cliff-side like the ones you see in martial arts movies where kung fu masters meditate.

We started forcing, and in the first ten minutes-or-so of meditative forcing, the head pressures have arrived.

Drink some orange juice? And out of curiosity what do you like to visualize while forcing. Most of my forcing so far has had to be passive, so I'm curious to know some good meditative tulpaforcing.