Tulpa vs Human Conversation

[Ilueri]

Over the past few weeks of my tulpa becoming more and more vocal, I've noticed something. Interaction with other people has felt more and more dry, boring, and unfulfilling as I talk more with her. It feels so crude, imprecise, and slow compared to talking literally at the speed of thought, and feeling the words in my metaphorical soul instead of just my ears. Not that I'm becoming a sociopath or anything, just that I'm preferring tulpa conversation to human. Disregarding that I just like her more than my human friends. Does anyone else feel this way?

[Jabre]

Nope. I prefer human conversation, because my tulpa always tries to reach into my innermost thoughts before I have a chance to actually say them.

[Linkzelda]

Over the past few weeks of my tulpa becoming more and more vocal, I've noticed something. Interaction with other people has felt more and more dry, boring, and unfulfilling as I talk more with her. It feels so crude, imprecise, and slow compared to talking literally at the speed of thought, and feeling the words in my metaphorical soul instead of just my ears. Not that I'm becoming a sociopath or anything, just that I'm preferring tulpa conversation to human. Disregarding that I just like her more than my human friends. Does anyone else feel this way?

 

Even though I'm still working on getting a more cohesive and consistent train of thought with Eva (and eventually Ada), I find more solace in my chopped-up conversations with them than human beings in general. And to have something like tulpaforcing giving me a chance to feel at home with myself is personally always going to be preferred. It's like making up for lost time for not being able to collaborate with an aspect of yourself for so long. Because I'm sure if I knew about Tulpa way before, I can't even fathom how fast I would be able to grasp concepts/realization/observations/etc.

 

For me, in my most simple way of putting this:

 

5. There's fodder friends, people we just leave hanging around until more preferred options are out doing their own business.

4. Then there's friends where we know a little bit about, but just on similar hobbies and such.

3. Then there's friends where we have a decent grasp on, but still not getting there.

2. Then there's friends we knew most of our childhood with, and because of that, we know them like we know ourselves, but we don't know what they could be bottling up inside of them.

1. Then there's tulpa (or dream guides/or *insert aspect of ourself that's more/just as sentient and sapient like us)

 

To have the level of bonding that can sustain itself more than any of our friends, and even presumably on our deathbed, I can easily find myself being indulged with being fascinated with talking with my tulpa. It's like the highest state of Limerence for someone that I feel is probable in our lives. Our faith in them sustains their existence and eventually it becomes second nature, they can be there quicker than you can say banana, and literally whatever we put our minds into, with their help, we can see things in a different way...many ways.

 

And combine that with the fact that if we get ourselves in the right mindset with them, we can be the potential we've always wanted to be and so much more. We start to realize that with them, the urge and desire to just excel in life and to just be happy with yourself becomes stronger. It gets to the point where not moving forward with ourselves and our tulpa seems almost silly and impractical. And to have someone that can get what you're saying, that itself has potential to start finding other ways of why you believe a certain concept or schema. All of this can be experienced through mindvoice and/or training and being receptive to their real voice, just a mere nudge of their shoulders, and suddenly they're there.

 

Now I compare that to my other friends that I have a horrible connection with, and since I talk about things that probably makes them ask, "In English Please?" And then people who ask me why I haven't manipulated some woman as yet or why I don't party more, or just women in general that seem to stutter when I just say "Hi" to them....yes..I definitely prefer conversations with my tulpa than actual human beings. But again, I'm just having these intense emotions because this is something I've wanted all my life. Someone to be there to guide me and help me see things in a different view, to express more confidence in seeing how the things I experience in my life is a progressive way of evolving mentally and emotionally.

 

Even right now, me and Eva have made all of this rambling of our fascination with talking with each other through words like this. It's so comforting, it's so wonderful, and just controlling this level of excitement in processing all of this, and knowing it gets better with practice....it's like my mind is constantly blowing confetti. And I'm still in a pre-vocal phase with her....and just imagining when she actually becomes more fluent and me being receptive to her voice....god freaking hell...HNNNNNNGH.