Kit and Elise

[Kitsunin]

It sounds like possession is a lot easier than imposition though. Honestly I've been working on it because it's simple, doesn't require a lot of work for me, and has obvious results x.x

 

The big thing right now is, Elise needs to be more autonomous, I feel like a lot of what she does is directly caused by my thoughts, like I'll find myself thinking maybe she'll do X and she immediately does X, 50% of the time she does anything. I dunno, I guess I'm figuring if I just keep on her actions will get to be more of her own and less of mine, but I feel like I should be doing something to more actively help.

 

I wish I could really get deep into a trance state and be with Elise like I was earlier on, but it's just not happening. I wonder how I managed to fall asleep like that. For one I really need a set of headphones, I have high quality 'buds' which are also noise cancelling, but I know it's just not the same as comfortable overear ones when trying to relax, especially as my ears are pretty sensitive. Efffffff not having my own money to spend.

[Kitsunin]

[align=center]9/7/2013

Day 10[/align]

 

Did someone say update? No? Well it's an update, so too bad.

 

I've stopped with the daily updates because there just isn't as much to go off of now. Elise matured somewhat before I started so there were some great big leaps early on, but things have naturalized and now this is just a smooth process. The excitement and the anxiety are gone, which I would have expected would make it easier to trance, but oddly it seems to have had the opposite effect. I haven't had anything nearly as vivid as those first two dreams, or whatever they were. I even tried listening to a couple of hypnosis recordings and I just didn't get as deep as usual. Well, I got some over-ear headphones the other day at least. They're not noise cancelling though, alas.

 

I've been doing image streaming exercises, so I think I'm getting sort of better at this visualization junk, but I feel unsure of Elise's appearance again, the one I picked earlier doesn't feel right.

 

Today I noticed something pretty important: I was saying that I felt like I was consciously thinking everything that Elise said, right? Well I realized today that it was something a little different. It felt like I would hear her voice, but I would have already thought of what she said, but what I realized is that the original thing, that feels like a thought, is actually Elise talking. It's so fast, almost like text in a book - I know it's there and unconsciously what it means, but until I read it I can't make sense of it. I realized this, that she would talk to me, and I would repeat what she said to me back to myself in her voice. Now though, if I pay attention and cut myself off from "reading" what she says, I actually hear her, and it feels like it actually is her, not me. I'm getting used to it, but I do feel a little confused whenever it happens.