My first tulpa!

[Extraordinarium]

So I recently found out about tulpae. It has fascinated me ever since. Okay, that makes it sound like it's been a really long time, actually, it hasn't. It's been nearly a week, but everytime I could spend time finding out about tulpae, I would. That made me decide to start creating one.

 

Yesterday evening, I decided I really wanted to do this. Once I lay in bed, I started talking to the tulpa. It pretty much felt like I was talking to myself. I fell asleep quite fast, so I don't think there was any progress at all. The good thing is, it's a start.

 

Today, I was more prepared. I started talking to her, talking about who I am, played some music while gaming, explaining what I was doing, talking about the music I like. I am saying "her", because I chose to let her be female at first. It's all up to her if she wants to change anything, I am not the boss over her at all. But it's fine for now, that's what it feels like to me at least.

 

After a couple of minutes, I got this head pressure/headache feeling, and even now, while writing this, I still have this very light pressure feeling in/on my head. I suppose that's a good thing. I think I have spent one and a half hour of passive forcing in total.

 

I feel kinda relieved, confused and satisfied at the same time. I have no experience with creating tulpae at all, so this first head pressure is a relieve, because I know I am at least going in the right direction. I am confused because I don't really know what to do next. That might sound strange, because, well, I can just continue what I was doing. Though it feels like I should do something else. And I am satisfied because of this first result.

 

It's been a nice adventure so far! :D

[Xantan]

Welcome to the forums, and greetings to your tulpa.

 

So far it sounds like you're doing exactly what you should be doing. you're treating her like a person and explaining everything you can about yourself and the world around you.

 

Alice says the "light pressure in/on my head" is her thinking of you. I'm not sure what she means by this exactly, but i think believing her would really help. (usually when in doubt i assume it's my tulpa rather than not)

 

Keep up the work and let us know how she progresses.

[Extraordinarium]

A few days have passed now, and I have continued passive forcing a lot. Also, during my first serious active forcing session, the head pressure got way stronger than it used to be before. I don't even feel like I have spent that much time forcing, but I think this is going to right way.

 

So, I was talking to another tulpa on the IRC. Suddenly, another one jumped in the conversation, saying I should hug my tulpa. "How?" "Just visualize is, imagine yourself hugging your tulpa." So I did. My whole body calmed down after the hug was finished, but I don't know if this was an emotional response or not. It was definitely something I had never felt before. Amazed by the hug, I could only say "Wow" to my tulpa. But right after the hug, the head pressure disappeared which I found to be very frustrating. I felt like she may not have liked the hug. I really don't know. I'm saying "she" from now on, because I imagined her as such during the hug.

 

Five seconds later, the head pressure returned, as strong as it used to be. That was a relief to me, not that the hug was such a disaster.

 

Anyway, I have just begun creating my tulpa, and I'm having lots of fun. I can't wait before I can really hear her, which I have already felt like I did. Once. I heard a very quiet "bye bye" yesterday evening when I wished her a good night. It could also have been me hallucinating though.

 

I also have tried communicating by head pressure. I would ask questions, and pressure would mean "yes", no pressure would mean "no". It didn't really work out that well, the answers were very unclear.

 

That sums my last couple of days up actually. I am very curious where I -and of course the tulpa- will be next week! :D