Worried.

[KarlYoshimura]

I've taken several hours of my time - over the course of the past few weeks - to tulpaforce, and have garnered a consistent form for my tulpa as well as a healthy base for its personality.

 

This progress may sound dandy, however I've come to doubt if my intentions were altogether pure and I remain apprehensive at the type of bond I may create with my tulpa (that is, if said tulpa manifests at all).

 

What tweaked me out was an excerpt from Irish_'s guide: if one created a tulpa for "shallow" purposes (sex, episodes of one abusing one's tulpa, et cetera), negative consequences may follow. I'm not sure if tulpae can inflict mental harm, yet I am worried about how my tulpa will perceive me and the intentions that preceded its creation.

 

To my understanding, a tulpa is a living schism of one's subconscious that interacts with the senses. If correctly rendered, it will house a conscious understanding of its own environs and live as it chooses. If this entity arises, I expect it to depart from me after it matures and return intermittently at its discretion, or even reject me because of the anxious, hidden selfishness that spawned it. Perhaps tulpae do not work this way, yet I did read that tulpae may not always wish to remain with their creators. If so, where do they go? What do they do?

 

I came into this endeavour as one who wisht to complete an ever-present companion, a partner; this will appear insane, but something to even love and nurture. Mayhap that is where I am mistaken. Bottom line, I am currently indifferent with tulpaforcing as I fear my tulpa abandoning me for its own desires and inclinations. To date, I haven't meditated properly on my tulpa in three days and have low spirits when I contemplate this issue.

 

Should I continue as I was? Should I scrap any notion of finding permanent communion with tulpae? Should I start again?

[Guest]

"I came into this endeavour as one who wisht to complete an ever-present companion, a partner; this will appear insane, but something to even love and nurture."

 

It sounds to me like you shouldn't be worried if your intentions have not changed.

[Guest Zee]

Should I continue as I was? Should I scrap any notion of finding permanent communion with tulpae? Should I start again?

 

For all intents and purposes you should still continue your tulpaforcing. The main issue that should be addressed here is the fact that you're potentially becoming paranoid about what could happen. While I cannot attest for the experiences of others with this, becoming excessively worried about how your tulpa thinks of you is going to cause more harm than good.

 

I cannot say that you shouldn't be somewhat apprehensive as your concern is quite legitimate. Unless your intent for having the tulpa ends up greatly conflicting with the ethical code that they develop, your relationship will be fine. It's highly unlikely that your tulpa will want to separate themselves from you if the reasons you've provided are honest.

 

As long as you don't bear any ill will towards them (e.g. creating them solely for the "shallow" purposes) it is unlikely that they will choose to leave you. Also, if you do have any desires regarding them, allow your tulpa to have an equal amount of input as you on the matter. They make up half of the creator/tulpa relationship after all.

 

To sum it up: Keep tulpaforcing; but after reaching a certain point of sentience, allow your tulpa to have input on what you work on regarding them.

[KarlYoshimura]

 

It sounds to me like you shouldn't be worried if your intentions have not changed.

 

 

 

For all intents and purposes you should still continue your tulpaforcing. The main issue that should be addressed here is the fact that you're potentially becoming paranoid about what could happen. While I cannot attest for the experiences of others with this, becoming excessively worried about how your tulpa thinks of you is going to cause more harm than good.

 

I thank you both very much for your concern and input.

 

To be honest, I really was thinking of quitting the whole deal. When I tried to tulpaforce this morn, the only things that came to my head were nasty images of Xenomorphs eating and crawling through walls of flesh and people drowning in their own blood. I guess that's the downside of having a precise and vast imagination. : (

 

Anyhow, I'll keep trying. I'd like to reveal the fruits of this labour in the future.