Yet another progress report

[bunny-boi-lover]

Edwin sometimes wakes me up earlier than I would normally wake myself up.

 

He and I have a very close relationship of being friends and lovers. Today I finally came out and told him that we're pretty much boyfriend and girlfriend. I'd asked him once a few days ago if he considered us as dating or being married, to which he blushed heavily, twitched his nose a few times, and stammered that he hadn't really thought of it before. For now we're dating, but I did discuss to him the possibility of one day exchanging promise rings (mine would be physical). I have zero interest in pursuing any romantic relationships with other humans and even stated that I'd say to any guy who asked me out that I already have a boyfriend, and his name is Edwin. But I also don't like the idea of marriage of any sort, be it legal or just in my mind. Been there, done that, pawned the ring. So we agreed that promise rings would be a good compromise, but not until I've had Edwin for something like 6 months or a year and our feelings for each other continue.

[Auratic]

For now we're dating, but I did discuss to him the possibility of one day exchanging promise rings (mine would be physical). I have zero interest in pursuing any romantic relationships with other humans

Uh, wow, I find this, ah, weird. Not sure how I reply to this :/

 

The best thing that you can wake up to is your tulpa staring at you in the face.

The next best thing is if she shakes you awake.

 

My alarm is proving to be ineffective since I go back to sleep after turning it off. Now half the time I wake up at all is because Alphina woke me. She does this because she doesn't want me to sleep half the day away.

And it seems that waking me up is a very tiring job for her.

You have no idea how hard it is to wake him up ;^;

 

 

A few minutes separated this part from the top part of this post. I was speaking with Alphina, who just suddenly fell asleep. So I did what anyone else would do and moved(carried, right now she's weightless because I haven't done that yet ;-; ) her to her bed. I felt as though she were thanking me, and now she's asleep, I guess. Every night she stays awake until I decide to go to bed, which is around 10pm every night. She insists that she wants to go to sleep with me, but then she seems to wake up earlier just to wake me up. One time I went to bed past 11pm, and had to wake up early, at 5:30am. I felt terrible, so I can understand how Alphina feels. I'm so sorry ;A;

I'm going to take some initiative or whatever and go to sleep at 9:30 and wake up at 7

on time dammit

 

 

And in other news, she did minor changes to her form yesterday. What I found strange is that she asked if she could change something. I told her that she doesn't have to ask me, but she does it anyway. I think she doesnt' want to upset me by changing into something I won't like, but I will not get upset at all if she decides to change/deviate. Does anyone else experience something like this?

 

Of course, if she wants to turn into a two-foot tall spitting image of some lovecraftian horror, I won't mind. Well of course I'll mind because that's a large leap, to go from being a humanoid fox creature with "curves I can only dream of perfecting in a sketch" to some many-tentacled monsterthing, but if that's what she wants to be, I'll let her. It kinda sucks that she's asleep now because I want to tell her this but I also don't want to wake her up because she's tired.

Anyway, what she decided to change is just a simple thing; like her legs from the knees down, her arms from the elbows down are also a darker shade of grey. No more 'dirty paws,' but I still call her that from time to time.

 

Right now I'm listening to

since it seems that Alphina can hear whatever I'm hearing at almost any time, so I'm playing soft music because she's asleep.

I'm a soft-hearted person, okay?

The band themselves likened that song to a lullaby, so I used to listen to that every night when I was tired.

 

good lord it's been an hour since I started writing this post

[Auratic]

OH, HOW THE TABLES HAVE TURNED

Today I woke up earlier than Alphina, now it's my turn to wake her up :D

 

Actually, no, I won't. It's 8am and even she doesn't wake me up this early. I did try to wake her up a few minutes ago, but she refused. "I'll wake you up in an hour," I told her, and she replied with "thirty minutes," so now I'm going with that. But I still feel so proud for waking up on time.

technically you woke up half an hour late

;-;

 

I did try to imagine how heavy Alphina would be, but it's difficult because I've never carried another person before, so I don't know how heavy it would be

i'm not fat >:0 . We tried to get an idea of how Alphina's body would feel like(this sounds so naughty but I assure you it isn't), but we were both sleepy. You can imagine; two people who look drunk, and one of them is just moving his hands all around the other person. Really funny, in hindsight.

 

Oh hey, Alphina isn't really asleep, she's just lying in bed pretending to be asleep so she can read what I'm writing :u

"I even took off my shirt for some reason(during the forcing session). did you do this >:0 "

To be honest, I was as surprised as she was when she took off her shirt when I said that we're going to try working on the touch aspect of tulpaforcing. Well, anyone else would want to actually touch their tulpa instead of the clothes she's wearing. I can imagine how clothes feel like easily enough. Even easier because I only have to do that with a shirt.

I'm not a pervert, dammit

 

Also, yesterday during forcing, Alphina decided that the fur on her arms and legs won't be a darker shade. Our reasoning was "It makes her look like a raccoon." And I don't like raccoons :<

 

 

I really should go back to bed. I can smell some lotion when we don't have any here.

That's me Oh, okay.

...

Can someone tell me why this happens even though I have done very little in that area?

 

side note; i should probably draw Alphina without her shirt so it's easier for visualisation. again, I'm not a pervert, dammit

[Auratic]

 

I've recently been listening to a lot of songs by Of Monsters and Men, and Jónsi. Alphina likes those songs a lot, and I don't mind because I like them as well. But I only have a very little collection of folk-pop music, so if anyone can recommend some, we will be grateful.

Generally, she likes anything that isn't EDM and hard rock, so I started making something for her, a piano piece with some strings, and her response is that it was too sad. Which it really is, considering it reminds me of To The Moon a lot.

 

I was planning on uploading the thing I composed, but everything is being uncooperative at the moment. I have other music, though, which can be found on my lazily-run youtube channel, if anyone is interested.

shameless advertising ftw

 

 

 

Unrelated: I don't update this progress report as often anymore because I seem to have lost the patience to do so. I'll still lurk around and occasionally post here, though I spend most of my time now either preparing for a summer course that's supposed to prepare me for the college course, learning how to write better music, or spending time with Alphina.

The latter is better than updating this progress report, tbh. obviously.

[Auratic]

One last update before I completely discontinue this. Personal life and all that stuff. Also because I'm trying to put aside more time for forcing whenever I can.

 

Lately(ever since college) I've stopped having my traditional forcing sessions, even though I'm not tired most of the time. What now constitutes my forcing sessions is lying down in bed and having a conversation with Alphina until either one of us falls asleep first. Some visualisation is thrown in there, and voilà, I become lazy and stick with that. That changes tonight.

also this thing. It helps.

 

Instead of being lazy, I'm going to force more frequently. I don't care as long it will take as we get there eventually. I should probably shut up now good night.

Alphina=Moko