Hope - progress report

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So, I've begun this to show progress on hopefully finalizing Hope's creation process that I started 26 September 2017. I then took a year break until 10 Feburary 2019 ^^





white fox

in creation (semi-sentiency)


• what we can do • (tested 11 February 2019)

(inconsistent) visualisation of Hope

random flashes of visualisation of Hope when not intending to

blurry visualisation


yes or no hand pulses




• what we want to do • (what I'm documenting!)

different voice in vocalisation so it's easier to distinguish me from her

clearer voice in vocalisation

clearer visualisation

consistent visualisation

extended conversations

forming personality and opinions


• what I want to work on •

less doubt on her

start fully regarding her as another sentience

get over my voice anxiety to narrate

stop being lazy and do more active forcing and meditation to meet her in wl



- Day 1, 2 and 3 to be posted soon -

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• Day 1 •

•Talking to a friend and she randomly came back from the dead/dormancy lol

•She actually talked for the first time in forever and I've grown used to it now but at the time it was a little startling she was so present in my mind.


• Day 2 •

•Briefly talked to Hope throughout the day and the occasional visualisation. School generally gets in the way.

•After some procrastination, tried meditating at night but got into a too comfortable situation aaand.. slept. However, before I slept I could test out the hand pulsing, and sure enough very distinct hand pulsing of yes and no. Could finally ask if it was her I was talking to in the back of my mind and it was her.


• Day 3 • (eventful!)

•Today I actually sat down and made sure to stay awake while meditating. I first set up a guided tulpa meditation, the one with the library visualisation, and relaxed fully in a slightly more uncomfortable situation than just laying down.

•We got semi-distracted as I was in a deep trance and asked if she could twitch my finger on a whim and it actually had some attempt, it shocked me a little. But like I don't wanna dip my foot at all into possession and switching it's just cool to know she's there.

I was finally able to do the personality gifting although she already knows what's she's like it was just on me to concentrate on getting it to her, and trying to keep her image consistent and stop flicking in and out of realistic and slightly cartoon-y.

• (edit) she kept making fun of the meditation dude because he was talking about vocalising to the host and she was being sarcastic in her responses to his orders because she knew what she was doing and found it funny lmao

•During an exercise in the meditation, she rejected Harry Potter and said it was boring (despite us never reading it) and took a liking to Lord of the Rings and said we should watch it. It has literally never interested me and seems incredibly boring but you know the things we do for tulpas. Found this interesting as it differs to my views.

•Something I noticed was my eyes had a hard time staying closed and kept flickering and becoming uncomfortable: probably need to work on that.

•I also noticed she had very glitchy movements. I still have to puppet her sometimes unfortunately.

•Basically active forced in WL for 10-20 minutes. I kept switching topic and becoming restless, probably excitement and not being in a deep enough relaxation and having the mind still be a little active. Basically just chilled on this extension on the WL - like a fishing deck hanging over the sea - her curled up against my side.

• After a while, I just did Indigo's Vocalisation Practise (helpful for conversational topics too) and did a handful of questions before she basically told me to go to sleep because I was yawning lmao


So, eventful day 3. not sure how often to post but I'll make an attempt for it to be frequent enough

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• Day 4 •

I hardly talked to her throughout the day.


•Did the same tulpa meditation video as yesterday however got very distracted and only used it minimally, had it just play in the background

•Got into a very deep trance and felt energy flow through my arms and legs and had my finger twitch and move a few times upon asking if Hope could do that for me

• Video ended. Then began sitting on the fishing deck extension and talked to her very briefly about my day. I kept getting distracted in my thoughts but I believe that was because I did this at 11pm after a stressful school day lol

•Tried to construct the general layout for a new wl, not just a small island, and maybe a small cottage. I very quickly went over an exterior and the inside and made a bed quickly for us to lay on and an optional cushion beside the bed for her.

• Not much time was spent with her today.. Didn't hear much talking.


Very distracted mind today, but a good meditative state. Tomorrow I will work on making the new wl design.

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• Day 5 •

School was too stressful to do anything, and slept at 6pm.


• Day 6 •

At night, I had a huge anxiety attack over everything in my life piling up. I think I will have to take a break from tulpamancing until I can physically and mentally recover from it, as I'm still feeling the effects this morning.

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• Day 7 •

Nothing today.


• Day 8 •

She actually spoke to me today out of nowhere. It was quite promising and accidental progress. I wasn't even thinking about her. Had a rough day with my heart and chest.


• Day 9 •

It's only the morning of today, but I'm booked into the doctors for today to get my chest checked out.

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