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Identify if what I have are tuplas or something else?


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(edited)

 

Hello All, I am new here And I think, it will be quite hard to tell all what I have only in one post. I have found this forum in foreing website (at our country are no good forums for this theme, most of it is called "imaginary friends" and I have no many people to talk about it and share my experience (and I have really a lot of experience with them for many themes)

But may be, I will need to help with identify, what my creatures really are. So there I will share all my most important "realms" I remember and are conected with my world. I am sorry that it is so logn, but to undestand it, can´t be shorted.

 

Since childhood, I had "imaginary animals and friends", mostly horses (when I was 4 years old and my first horse I remember by name and appereance, was named Alke, he was big, furry and black with white and brown spots on his head, belly and legs (like bernese mountain dog) and he was big). It started with imaginary horses and with feeling I am not human.

 

By time, I have in childhood seen Lion king, Dino documentaries etc...from these were created creatures named Konydaptor (from word Kůň - means horse in my language - and daptor like some raptor) - it was horse x dino like cross with long tail, it had fur, stripes, claws like dino etc. When I were going to kindergarden (so before elementary school), in my fantasy, I used to be one of these animals and I had my "family". I lived in my fantasy among dinos and to people wordl I had ability to go among wordls. When I had my first kindergarden love, I was seeing myself like "Konydaptor" and my "love" (real person) like normal human. Interesting, that from this time I have one original children painting of them. But still like normal children fantasy. some short time after Konydaptors I had "gold foxes family". But it was short time.

 

After going to elementary school, I started to have more sophisticated world and found, that my world is like paracosmos. There were really quantums of creatures and worlds, but there I started to find, that these worlds are not on planet Earth and I started to be a "traveller". My original creatures (what I believed I am one of them) started to change and found, that they are not from Earth too. Their appereance was very similar to Konydaptors - Long tail, furry body, stripes on back, sharp teeth and claws. But now, they looked like some cross between tricolor collie but with really long "lion like" tail and with brown back and 7 black stripes on its back. They had one specificum - from Konydaptors, they had all time thorns from the nose to the end of tail - small, very sharp and with ability to pull them like cat claws. I stil used to be one of them and had own "family" and started to have history. Name of their race is Archeodonts (there are more Archeodonts) and claim Sanaga (Archeodonts have more claims).

In this time I started to "live" like one member of Sanaga, I had brother, mother, father etc.

by time I was growing, my world didn´t disapear with age, but started to grow. I found, that my creatures and me can fly with wings (when are wings fold, disapear) and can change their appereance from "animal" to humanoid with tail and animal ears). After time, I have found they have ability to change to anything they want because of their flexible godlike energy, can teleport themselves and use 100% of „psychical energy“ – no technology needed. They started to be space travellers, which were created in space by God, but (and it is very hard to explain) - but they only got appereance from God, but they are something else than God creatures. They are their own gods. Difference is that "human God" can grow and reproduce without loosing strenght, Archeodonts can´t and they can´t cross each other - only one way - but this explained lower. But they are powerful like God too, but when they will reproduce a lot, their power will be weaker, so they don´t do it. There are only 126 members of Sanaga and last two waiting to be created. Other claims of Archeodonts are something similar - god like energy but from other Gods. One God = one Archae energy when new God "is born". In my world are many gods - each has own claim of archeodonts. In Each God have own spaces, paralel spaces, own time, life, creatures and so on...which god will new born God will be like depends on its´s "genetics" (depens which God was "born" from another God - like parents and children and their genetics) - so Gods can be empty without life, without spaces, dimensions, but can be full of dimensions without psysical spaces or can contain only psysical space without life etc...). It is believed, that beings from one God can´t to go to another God, because their existence depends on God they live in. So they can reincarnate, but only in this one God. But Archeodonts can go anywhere they want. They have concentrated power, because they have no spaces in them and don´t create in themselves like Gods.

Most time my world is created by things I see, listen or "live" inside, but interresting, that i tis mostly like you „hear or see something“ and it is like lost memory – „aha, so this is that“ and it become to my world. But what is most odd, when I have found in this world something what doesn´t make sence, I ask myself, how it could be? And sometimes immediately, sometimes days, weeks or year later, i get by fealing, idea or "lost knowlege" like answer and suddenly the missing piece of the puzzle seemd to fit. So most of creating moments are like „aha moments“- doesn´t matter if by me „created“ or got from real world.

Example: first time Ménazes looked like horses. But, they are not horses? So …they started to little change their appereance. One year later, they were more slim and more faster and could teleport through fog to Saragonia…I noticed, that they are running by 20-30 cm above ground and are able to go on the water surface and well climb on big trees. I asked again How, they have hooves? Than one time I was sitting at my table and learning to school or drawing and than I noticed small picture of little bird sitting on branch. That was answer – they have fingers with claws on each leg! And started to change appereance again. But how they can teleport and run so fast? And Griffel was managed to run with them and teleport too when he is no archeodont and no Ménaz? Why? ….after time…answer was from inside. The archeodont energy exploded ant got to Ménazes and gave them this ability. And to Griff? He got this energy from Sanaga his own piece to be able learn from Ménazes and Sanaga and to live with them and guard….and so on. My inside world is full of questinons and build on answers like this.

 

One time I was thinking about how my creatures were "created" and answer was by god this way (don´t know who told me it):

when was "human God" (by Archeodonts means God, where live people in) very young, there were only two races - Safrans - man priests like beings with male principe - but not sexual - main god wisdom and most closest to first principal God´s energy - when there was no other beings, they are "the first" was created. The second race are gray/silver like nurses most similar to gray aliens - but very imaculate female energy. These two races shlould be first bearers of "evolution" of life and all entities in God. But than God found something interesting in himself - stuck archeodont energy - it was different from him and he "played with it, didn´t know what it is" and gave animal like appereance. Than these creatures were "woken up" and got from God own awareness. Than he found, that these creatures don´t behave as he expected and he couldn´t predict, what they will do. He was afraid and wanted to destroy them. But when he did it, they didn´t disapear. Yes, they "fell" down and seemed to be "dead", but then woke up, and Archeodonts found, That God can´t control them. But because comunication among Archae and God was created before this accident, they started to cooperate. God wanted Archae to incorporate to evolution, but they couldn´t. So there was reached an agreement among God and Sanaga, they will help each other. So Sanaga started to teach themselves about life, evolution, dimensions etc. They acquired and stored knowledge in themselves (Sanaga have brain, elongated spinal cord to second brain in place, when human spin ends and long nerve continuing through whole tail (like in Avatar) and their tail is their "memory". (only this I had long time before Avatar was in cinema, so I wasn´t inspired by this). Archeodonts are very poverful beings, but because their power is very concentrated in their "body" - they are very careful how they use it. While God decentralized himself - he is in every creature and atom etc in "him" and added his god beings own wollition. But not everytime is going well, and than Sanaga helps to God get back to balance - and teach by this and use their knowledge. When Archeodont´s didn´t get appereance and self-confidence from God, they souldb be still only energy bubble with no development. Long time after this archae and God accident started to be "right evolution" of god beings and than Sanaga helped with it. In this time of "second, the right evolution came angels, daemons and other beings humans can imagine or believe - so Sanaga is much older than everything people can "know". Because Safrans and grays are not "participated" to this second evolution, Sanaga are there "the oldest and most powerful" beings, but because they work mostly in undercover (versus angels, helper spirits, Jesus haha etc) they don´t show much themselves, only when they want or need to show themselves and "leave a link" when they have gone and still need to work on this world they are "setn". So versus angels they are in worlds versus angels mostly unknown and opposite angels, they have their own autonomy from god, while angels are addicted to God. The reward for them is knowledge and experience and sometimes they bring from this world something "else".

 

So I used to believe, that I am one of Sanaga reincarnated to this world among people to help with something and waiting for mission. When I was a child, I believed that I have no tail, and that´s I don´t remember more. Than because I have no tail, another believe was, that when I will concentrate, my tail will "come back" or will grow up again - so I thought my tail was cut off. I had "full world and knowledge of this space trawelling, beings in many dimensions and kinds of wolrds (which are opened, half opened and non opened to reincarnation, hard space worlds - like Earth, worlds conected to planet but from another dimension, capsule worlds, which were in some "capsule" but din´t were connected to anything physical and many many other , life in cosmos, reincarating and many "missing" memories and knowledge from Archeodonts job and travelling. 

Archeodonts have own home out of "human God". When they were looking to find place to live, they went out of God and found place "outside" in another God, but immediate vicinity to "human God". They met with other beings - Ménazes (one Ménaz). These are second creatures from my world - horses like - but more slim and higher with three fingers and claws on each leg. They help to Sanaga and do guardians and learn from Sanaga, trawel with them to worlds and guard them, when some of Sanaga are reincarnated. They have their own history:

 

Before Sanaga came to their world named Elca pora, Ménazes vere living in one "capsule world" in another God than "human God". Elca pora was full developed world, well going - Elca pora means something like "gold/rich world" - but once there was another Archae enrgy with no development and nobody knew about it in this God. In this God there are no "space full of stars". But still full of life and civilisations, much much older than "human God" and these civilisations knew about each other, there was very well developed comunication. But one "day" there was explosion of this unknown energy (archeodont energy can´t be detected for "god beings" - it is detected only when enegy "shows" itself - Archeodonts can and when this energy exploded - it showed. For Elca pora it was devastating. Most of everything there was and lived died and dissapeared. There was only one little place stood untouched by this energy. It happend by way that part of Archae enegy exploded an this part "deleted" everything in this world. The part which stood, was "hidden" behind part of energy, which didn´t explode. Most interresting is, that in the point, where it exploded, where some hunders of Ménazes and they "absorb" part of this archae energy and by this they were "only" survivors from their race. Other Ménazes died. Than shocked "survival" Ménazes found they got some new abilities, but didn´t know, how and what happened. They found, that they can teleport themselves, run faster and faster and didn´t die. Whole life in this "survival" world behind this energy which stood snugling like a leech to this world, life went much slower and was covered by "fog". - since this time "fog" was borders of this survival world - like athmosphere for Earth. Nobody couldn´t go through - only survival Ménazes. Nobody knew, what happend. Outside civilisations din´t knew too…one „day“ Elca pora disapeared for them and they couldn´t find it again. Than one day Ménazes met Sanaga on borders - when they went to found new home. They found, that can somehow comunicate together ant "talked" for a long time. Than Ménazes asked Sanaga for help. They helped and stood at their "survival land" to live and named it Saragonia. From Ménazes, they get ability to "teleport through fog", so Sanaga and Ménazes are only who can do it (because of archae energy - they can "share" their abilites. Ménazes started to guardian Sanaga and learn by their side when members of Sanaga work "outside" and there is still some members of Sanaga staying in Saragonia to protect before if other beings wanted to attack Saragonia. In human time it means story older than hunderds/thousants of bilions of years...so old are Sanaga and Ménazes are much older. And because Sanaga and Ménazes „shared“ this archae energy (each little another“, they made from this rest unused archae energy library and „external memory“ of Archeodonts and Ménazes – from this energy Sanaga took a small piece of energy to Griffel to cover his energy and gave him abilities like Ménazes. Till this time, Griff was „only external“ amnog Archae, who was gaven to share this with them.

this is how my "paracosmos" was created in childhood and background of my "wonderland".

 

Paralelle with this, I got from my aunts friend book about horses. It was around my age 9. It was Christmas and I was sitting in my grandma´s chair and wieving this new book I liked. And when I found there one picture with black, furry horse. It impressed me a lot (I had a lot of horse books but never happend something like this) - and immediately there was "strong voice" in my head (like somebody talked to me) and told:

"Griffel or Arinéz"

"what?" I couln´t found what it was. Something talked to my head and gave me to chose from these two names.

So I chose Griffel. And since this time, I started have black imaginary horse named Griffel, with apperiance from this picture. He was great handsome stallion. When I was daily dreaiming about him, he was my "guardian". Everywhere I trawelled in my dream, he protected me, everywhere I was riding him. When some troubles in worlds, he saved me. When I was dreaming about "real" horse (I always wanted one), I wanted horse like him calling Griffel. But than, he started to talk with me in my daily dreams. He got a lot of abilites and grew with me. He was wisdom, powerful and my best friend. By time, he started not only to talk in dreams, but I felt his energy, his presence, from begining he had his onw net voice. He was my "real" Archeodont guardian with me in this world. Once I was on secondary school, I asked him, why he can´t come to our wolrd and be like my horse. He answered "I would like, but when I will come, I will be limited to physical body and now where I am, I can help you much more." - his answer shocked me. It was so spontal and din´t still know, what will be his role in my real life.

How I grew and „get info“ about his history:

I was still asking, who the second one, who was Arinéz, when I chose and have Griffel. Answer was, it was Griffel´s right brother. And he was very bad and dangerous. Than I „started to get info“ – some story in my head, what was happening – because many things „happen in parallel“ with my real life.

I asked, where I got Griff?

He was adopted by your fathers Ménaz guardian named Omero la Oriente and brougt by him, by Sanaga and other Ménazes. His mom Zagora from Griff´s black race, his dad was „gangster“ and his mother was „raped by him“ and from this connection became Arinéz Griff´s older brother. Their race was totally spoiled by some beast beings to dark side and there stood only one, Zagora with „odl good pure blood“. She was raped again and she found she is pregnant again. But now she knew there was something different. She was pregnant with Griff and she felt, he will have „her good blood“. To protect this new baby she run away and hidden, than Griffel was born. She didn´t want let know Griff´s father because he would be immediately killed. In this time luckily went around Omero (my archea fathers guardian Ménaz) checking borders of deleted land Elca pora and found abnormality on other side. Omero asked Sanaga to check, and they found there was „little foal“ with some abnormalities. Sanaga comissioned Ménazes to také care of Zagora and little foal to protect them and wait, how will Griff grew up. When he was little older, they took him with themselves to Saragonia. There Griff was found he is „good one“ and for test got little peace of archae energy like Ménazes to be able to go with them and learn from them. Than Griff started to learn to learn. When he get older and learning went well, one day there was desided he will be tested if he can be guardian. So in this time, I was in Saragonia just little baby. My archae father toke me to Omero and he brought me to border near place, where Griff lived. There he toke and left myself sleeping on „endless plains“ (after dead Elca pora) and Griff got task to find me and bring me safely back to Saragonia. All time was watched by Omero and Sanaga from distance. He completed the task. So Sanaga told, he start to learn like guardian. He grew up with me in Saragonia, we were „trawelling“ together everywhere we went or were sent to mission. And now, he is guarding me on this world.

And about Arinéz – till my 25 years old in real world, he was like „bad shadow“ begind Griffel. I felt that Arinéz is somewhere. And Griffel wasn´t all time at me, but very often „disapear“. So sometimes when I needed him and didn´t come immediately by himself, I should call him. Sometimes Griff was upset or worried – but not with connection with me. Once I asked what is happening, and he answered that why he is going away – is that he is checking some personal things parallel while guarding me. After time I got info, that this reason is Arinéz. He was fighting with him all the time and another thing, that during time, Griffel´s mother died. One day, I was tiding room and I felt like I got a lot of energy from somewhere. Griff nowhere. It was too much energy, that I strightly stopped to scretch myself for these three days. Than started again. I was surprised what i tis and where from. After three days Griff appeared and told: „I killed my brother and last useful energy I sent to you“. I was surprised. I stopped to feel Arinéz was living. Than Griffel disapeared again and again, sometismes for shorter time, sometimes for longer…when was end this time and he started again to appear normally he used to, he told me: „all time I was away from you, I found clone hatchery of my brother. Thousands of his clones! My heart was blooding and terrified when I saw that. I had to finish it. When Sanaga gave me energy and protection, I wanted to finish it by old way, but some things, without Sanaga I would be never like this without them. Sanaga and Ménazes gave me home and family. Better when „old good blood“ stood in me pure as it was. I was left free will from Sanaga and I decided. I killed whole my „bad race“. There was no one to pair with. The idea of uniting with that corrupt race and go back to try to save them…there was no way. I was upset. I chose. I stay side by Ménazes, Sanaga and you. I murdered my whole race. I am only who stood and in me, and at least I keep the memories and „last good blood“ at myself. At me, goods will live forever till I will live.“ – by this way, he saved another more worlds, which his race wanted to atack (by brother clones etc)


By family problems and other I had in real world sometimes brought me "thoughts" to go back home to "Saragonia" (to die). And Griff guarded and didn´t let me. I had few shock and panic states (when I was myself at home) and Griff was able to bright out from it. Many times. I have sister, which had a lot of problems from family too. We wasnt so bad family, not like violence, abuse, alcohol, roaring, thrashing things...but something deep and silence, what wasn´t told, there was. Of course, there were some crazy things that happened, but nothing "worse" than in other ordinary families. I had from family OCD - Dermatilomany (deseased skin scratching and couln´t stop). It started after when I got Griff to my head, and stoped two monts back, when I am 29. But don´t think Griff was cause, because he whole time tried to safe me and his "heart was bleeding" that he saw he can´t help me (he fought for me all the time to not go crazy from that and helped to find many techniques how to stop it and protected me to not go crazy from my fantazy (sometimes I thought I am schyzofrenic, but psychos told me, that my "wonderland" and Griffel are amazingly working, they never met something like that - of course, by time they told that I shloudl start to find ways how to get better without Griff - to stop need his help. But nothing worked. Because my sister started to have deep problems too, and we didn´t have good relationship. I tried send Griffel away and my world away, but always came back and stronger than before. I still were thinking about, what went so wrong that me and sister has both so deep problems. My father used to say me "do not play that you are a horse, you will end up in madhouse" (with funny - he was proud how I drawed horses and he was close to my soul, but never let me ride on a horse - mom didnt want riding me because of money and safety, father always told he will buy me a horse when he will win in jacpot haha) but whal time, there was Griff. I felt somewhere deep in my soul, that one day me or my sister will end in madhouse or die young (by time much more felt that me or my sister have to die to survive other one and save from life problems - like ve were badly connected, by talking later in adult, we found we had both similar feallings but never talked a lot about it like now, younger we hated each other). It was still feeling till one day, my sister really got to madhouse. Whole time Griff protected me, he took care of not forget my worls and still told "don´t forget who are you".

 

Whole time before I started to have partners and move from home at age of 20 (my first partner, I never hurried) - there was one thoungt all time - since back to Konydaptors - once I will find man in real world, he will go with me to my world and become one of "us". So when Konydaptors - he will become Konydaptor - when Archeodonts - one time, he will be Sanaga like "me". This is main story of whole my life - I am not human and I am here on world to find partner, who will come with me to live in my world. Sanaga have some last "free" energy, to reincarnate for my partner which is not originated archeodont - archeodonts have no posibility to reincarnate among them. They decided that they will add chance to one only "God man" become one of thems. But to choose somebody is the hardest task, archeodonts ever had. And this task is mine. TIll this I was still dreaming. But what happened in reality, I never understood. Than I found how "powerful" is my world inside.

 

Another parallel thing is, that I was still doubtful and skeptic, if all I am thinking about, is in my head or reallity (of course, I knew what are my dreams and fantasy and what is real from "meat and bones"), but there were many moments, when my inside world literally "touched" reality itself and it took my breath away. From small things to big things (when It didn´t happen strighty to me, I wouldn´t believe it that something this can really happen).:

 

when I was still child, I started to go to library. With full head of this world, I was "tracking", what is what I have. Encyklopedies (including cosmic), whole worls legends, historical realms, fantasy books...and tried to answer myself if what I see is real or fictional. I didn´t find a lot. Only few paralels in space encyclopedies and few teories about reality etc. But no about Archeodonts. I thought...if I came to this world, how I should know that I came? Should be some "track" archeodonts use to leave they know who they are and don´t forget because of their mission, but have to "hidden" before other beigns what only they can see and know. Many years of searching in libraries brought nothing. One day I was upset and angry skeptic told to "beings up": "If I came to this world, there should be some "track", show me it."...one week later I went to library and got impulse to read author, which till this time I avoided and didn´t wanted to read any book of him. But this impuls was strong. So I chose one "general" encyplopedy written by him. When I came home, I didn´t know, where to start reading - so I closed my eyes, accidentaly opened on some site in middle and touched with finger. Than opened eyes and read :"hybrid beings" - omg, my beings are "hybrid" when have humanoid appereance, odd but, ok, i will read it. So..."one day there was man and woman with cow like tails going down on a cloud to hill Molama in Machame in Africa. Second day they were found by people and asked what are they doing there. Beings told: God sent us to live here. Humans: If you want to live here, you have to cut your tails. So they cut their tails and second day there was a cattle next to their hut and started to live among people..." - I could´t breath and started to shiver. What?? I didn´t know, what to thing about. And still don´t. Some african claims around Kilimanjaro believe in tailed heaven folk. So, where is my cut tail? and another funny thing - children wolrd which most changed and started my interlife, was Lion king, because on beginning with my imaginary family I "lived" on similar place in cave with rock and there is Kilimanjaro on begining. In this time I was around 6 and when found legend, I was on secondary school. After searching more info about, I found that This legend and Lion king are really connected near to Kilimanjaro. But still thought it is accidental. But something deep inside moved.

 

When I was in last year on secondary school, and had only this legend like track, I wanted to find partner. At my grandma i found book about how to use power of mind. And...it worked. I pried person who I believed couln´t exist. Two months later...my friend came, that have to met me with somebody. It was HE. Omg. We only met few times but never were together. But our minds were connected somehow (longer history - but fist founding how my mind is powerful not only fantasy - but in reality too, seriously - I tested it, because I am sometimes big skeptic and need evidence and the best repeatedly - not only that I thing somebody and he will wrote me or call - but I "created" situation in my head, time and conected with concrete place and subject - and it really happend - boy didn´t know about it he become little sacrifice of my mind and only needed was "thinking" about). After that my questions went deeper. What it is?

Than I saw first Avatar 3D in cinema. I felt like somebody robbed my head. Too many close details to me what people didn´t see. (include, when negative character grabbed Jake´s braid and lifted into the air and gave knife to his „nerve“ – for me, it was like somebody kill me – I felt the pain like my tail was cut) and than, that Jake was „reincarnated“ to Na´vi and left his human body. It was like my mission and bring partner to live „among us“ but from Naytiri´s wiev. And many other..)

 

I started to practice and "use" it in my daily life. I found, that I can use it when find "horseriding", new partner, new job...

 

Than I had my first partner same way. But now? I wanted somebody to "share my wordl with...but without words". I wanted to "show it".

When I ended my secondary school, I met this boy. He never had experience with telepathy, mind power, imaginary worlds...I saw him first time and he was working like ordinary constructs designer (but not engineer), so thinking about physics, math...and having ordinary family problems. Ordinary sad boy. But what happend...my world completely opened to him. I saw him third time, on loud discoteque and he...saw Griffel. He felt him. He talked with him...on discoteque with loud music and people around. I couldn´d believe. For test it, second day I wrote some things to my paper notebook. I wanted to try something and didn´t tell him nothing. Next day I saw him, I told him "I have something written and hidden, we will try." "Ok" he answered. "so I am thinking about some info, now it is count. How many it is?" "ehm, 162" "wthf, ok, next think..." I tried things one by one...and it workded. After that, when test was ended, I take out my notebook and showed him (didn´t told him if he is correct or not, but strightly showed him what I wrote day before" and he was schocked. One of things was this count "126" - but when I wrote it, I wrote it wrongly to 162, strike out and overwrite to 126. - this was count of Sanaga members. He was able to describe Archeodonts, their appereance, where they live, what they are...I only asked general question like what he see, what is changing, ...and he talked himself. My world and what I "see" inside was completely shared - without words. From beginning, Griff was very friendly to him. So I started to believe that he is right boy, Griff was happy, but some my inside human voice told me "don´t go to this, you will be sad, boy will hart you". Much more, that boy told me few times, that he talked himself with Griff when he was 20 km from me 😳. I was really shocked. After some time he told me, that one night Griff appeared in his room while he was sitting at the computer. Boy asked imaginary horse, if he can help him with some his problems like he helpes to me. Griff answered to him : "I will look into it and see what could be done". And than disapeared and did not apear again. After that, telepathy ended and my relationship went quickly wrong. "human voice inside" came through. I asked griff what happened, but there was no more connection with boy. So when boy wanted to broke up with me, I was very injured. Not only that my dreamboy wanted to leave me, but I was upset to Griffel too. Wanted to sent Griff and my wordl away forever. But another blow was, that boy told me "In hell, do anything you want, but I tell you, never let Griff send away from you. I saw him and anything will happen in this world, he will be by your side. What I have seen myself and what you told me about this world, i never had experience something like that till this, you know, when you are turn back to your world, it will kick you and come back anyway. He may be couldn´t help me, but he is here to help you." and said good bye. And I sent Griff away.

 

One year I was existing somehow. I still wanted my ex back. I wasn´t in contact with him and disn´t know nothing, only that shortly after me he found another girl. He was one year with her. I was checking boys profile one night and...Griffel appeared after one year. "hi Griff, what you want?" "be careful, don´t get too much in contact with your ex." "what?" "see tomorrow yourself. Be careful, I came to warn you." and disapeared. Next day I had friend request from ex on my FB. What? One week I was waiting and thinking. Than request accepted. He started to wrote me that he is sad, I was best girl he ever had (he was good boy, but after 4 long relationships he was too much hurted by girsl that to me he was "blind" and harted me. Since that time, Griff was very careful to any people. Than he started to protect me again and after connection with ex I very regreted I didn´t listen to Griff, because I was blind of love and worse that my mum wanted me to put back together with him. Than Griff helped me again. Ex on begining of our relationship told my mum behind my back, that he really feel Griff and talk with him. He was able to detect where he is, his mood and hear, when Griff was talking to both of us.

 

This experience drove me to study engineering and try to find way, how to prove, that this "power" is real like electricity. I wanted new partner, best engineer who has similar school and can help me with study. Somebody who will be family focused and practic in life and will help me to "settle" in this world. With no experience with this inside world, but with respect and some believe of that. And I found. But in final I didn´t went to this school. Guy is "family focused" and may be too realistic for me, but he know about Griff and my world from my talking and he respects them, but is afraid ot it. So he don´t want to listen about them much.

One day, I wanted to try if my partner is „sensitive“ and made test. I „created“ black horse different from Griff in room where we sleep and waiting if partner will see him. Two weeks later, he really saw him. He believed he saw Griffel. But I told not, that Griff don´t want to be seen by him after ex experience, he wasn´t certain if he is right person for me. This horse should only follow partners movement by turning its head where partner was going. And it did. It was mine created only for this test. Than disapeared. I explained to my partner, that if he would see Griff, he would be able to talk with him and Griff should introduce himself.

Whole time, I had problem with hard dermatilomany. My partner, Griffel and any psychologist couldn´t help me and myself couldn´t too. It was very hard. Two months back, I had bad thoughts again. I was exhausted by fight with dermatilomany. I wasn´t able to daily work. One night partner slept and I couldnt asleep, I started desperately cry. "God, take me with you, I can´t do it here anything. I don´t want to be here anymore. I don´t wont to wake up." Griff was standing next to my bed, his desperate look told he wants tell something, but I always silenced him. "go away Griff, you tried the best you could. You can´t help me anymore. I am on end. Go to help someone else." and he didn´t tell nothing and disapeared. In morning I woke up, totally broken that I woke up. One week expired, I was depressed and weekend was at our friends home. We slept at them, funny days, but In my mind I felt still same "I want to leave". When I fell asleep, I had nightmare. I left my partner, parents, friends, job...and in silence go away. There started to be darkness around me, my body disapeared and mind started to fade. Last thought was "it is my end, there is no way to go back" and i fell to endless darkness. "do you want to help?" I heared a voice in darkness. I woke up totally scared. This voice belonged to Griff. I was shocked. I wanted seriously to die and...

 

one week I was a lot of thinking and told: "Griff, doesn´t matter how it will end, yes, I want to help". and my mind began to change. All time we tried everything and nothing worked, I started to thing what warked before. So I decided to take some holiday and to connect with meditation. But because I didn´t know how to do it (tried many times but never worked), I told to this plan to my partner and he told it could be good idea (but din´t tel about depression), we went on weekend to partneres parents and started to thing about how I will do it. Than Griffel appeared. "stay here in room, we will try something." "ok?" "so, count stripes on curtains, on tshirt, carpet...and now tell me, what do your imaginary dino...thats right. Good. It seems you see and percieve reality same strong like us. So we can start." And meditation started. Griffel was talking to me, and I had to repeat after him. He told me, when I have to breathe, when count, when open and close eyes. On end he let me count stripes again. It worked. Dermatilomany was our from our under control. I stoped to scratch myself. Next meditation was in afternoon and in the evening. During these first meditations came another animal - white fox. I didn´t know, what is it, but it strightly asked Griff "how it is going?", Griff answered "well, it seems we get to right connection". "well, so now I will lead meditation. Hi I am Rajah. Now repeat after me...."it was member of Sanaga, only took appereance of white polar fox. I never knew, when is time to meditate. They always came and told me "now". I didn´t invent what I will meditate for, but whole words I repeated was so fast and spontaneusly told by Rajah. And it worked. She got under control my behavior. Out of meditation she talked to me about world where she is now and what is her mission like archeodont talking to other one. Griff was happy. But because of Rajah´s world was not safe connection, she was contacted by another Archae named Asilah from another world on her own mission, but while Asilah had safe connection and more time for me. Through one meditation after 14 days from start, they passed me on and Rajah took instructions to Asilah and then disconected. Since this, Asilah leaded meditations assisted by Griff. Next 14 days with Asilah, told me there will be one more connection, strihtly to Saragonia. My "last feeling" from Saragonia was, that all of Sanaga are outside, but only stood there two members. One my grandgrand uncle and second, who was sleeping. And this "sleeping" member I had one day feeling, he woke up and there are two active archeodonts in Saragonia. But didn´t know, who the second was. And to meditation, was connected this, who woke up, because my grandgrand uncle had some hard works, so he added some other competitions to second one. First time he was going through flat in animal appereance and scanned where I live and was waiting, when I will finsih my work at home. Than he connected to me, scaned my body, my mind, I felt like at the doctors. Told me he is Astelan and he found where it went wrong and fixed it. Told me a lot of things about mistakes among my sister and me, our connection, what went wrong when I came to this world and that my tail is well hidden. When found, it could kill people and be dangerous. That my mission is to be „silent“ but still remember who I am and write book about it. (and a lot of people are asking me to write a book about it, including psychologists) That my „track“ is book about my human life and archeodont inside me. And than, find partner here. My mission seems to be simple and easy, but in really, it is hardest archeodonts ever did. Because I have no tail, no power. Told that power of mind I have now instead of power of tail and live this hard among people to understand them in all aspects. And in my tail are „locked“ archae energys for my partner and child, which will be chosen and they will go with me to Saragonia. And Griff is trained to be guardian of my future family (i still have no children). Than that Griff did best he could, but didn´t have enouth energy to save me, so he went to ask for help to another archeodonts and most quickly fist answered him Rajah and helped him with first steps. Griff got more power from archae (from that exploded archae one, which are Ménazes „living“ on.)

Another being I have, is small dino coelhophisis Andrew „Andy“. He is from my childhood fantasy too from one worlds Archae were going to. He was adopted by Sanaga as small dino from Earth, found that he is much more intellitent. He grew up and Sanaga make for him whole copy of planet Earth somewhere in space and he lives here with „copies of dinosaurs“ and he is able to talk with me from distance and control dinosaurs by his mind power. This dino love movement and when Griffel knew, he can´t protect me himself away from depression and dermatilomany, he asked Andy to help. So year back, Andy and Griffel were trying to help me together. Andy was running next to me while cycling, running or swimming. He loves it. So he is another „tulpa“ like Griff, but only don´t have archae energy. Of milions of years he never paired. And now, he surprised me, that he did. He has two babies. I asked „why this time?“ Andy answered: „what if I die? I left them to leave there some other inteligent dino who will protect world you created, what if I will go back to Earth to help you and I will die?“ One day I was going to jogging and Andy told that his first name (I didn´t remember) by Sanaga was Zevu. But he liked new name how I call him „Andy“ and told he want to stay with this name. I told „ok“. „and another thing“ „yes?“ „I would like to name my babies too by human names“ „ok?“ „can we found some?“ „of course, which you would like?“ „dino girl shoud have meaning some like wisdom, boy some cheerful“ „ok, so I find this…“ „I dont like, this is strange, no…“ I readed name by name with meanings. „I love Ollie, how it is spelled. Is some simillar name with good meaning?“ „didn´t find“ „ok, let it be, I will see.“ Next day Andy came again. „I have chosen, girl is Olive – Olie like olive green because she is and boy is Alan – cheerful. I love these names! Here they are! We will see, if some of them will be inteligent after me.“ and two baby dinos were running and squeeking around. So now, when I am meditating, Andy leads meditations during jogging or cycling – so movement is for me new meditation. When Andy make mistake or tell something wrong, he is strigthtly corrected by Asilah or Astelan.

It is two montsh when I stopped having dermatilomany, stopped everyday loud sneezing, stopped to have panic and woollies and on other things we are still working. It is amazing experience. My real problems are changed day from day leaded by them. Astelan told me, that htere was big conflict about archeodont and human inside me (I am archae soul and got human body) and archae wanted to run away and body wanted to kill archae inside, because there was wrong connection bluilt by sanaga with little mistake and nobody noticed and Griff couldn´t detect whrere issue is. But it is impossible. And it was why I had dermatiĺomany. When he connected again these two entities inside me, told that dermatilomany is away forever from me, but till end of my life here, I will be connected with him everyday and he will everyday chech that connection is good. And really, since first meditation Griff started, first Rajah, than Asilah and now Astelan, really watching me every day and night 24/7. Allways is there somebody anywhere I do, anything I do. I am under „control“. And it helpes me in reality really a lot. No human helped me so much like them. It´s like they know what are they doing. Because I had another problem, when I went to toilet at night, most of time it was like there were some bad entities connected to me and stearing aliens to me – I was afraid and Griff not every time could detected them and blocked. Sometimes happened, that I saw some alien stearing on me or trying to touch me and Griff not. When I asked this alien who is he and go away, it didn´t, stared at me all time. But Astelan was able to block them all in one time. Since this time, I see nothing. Another what happened, that two years back, I was painting big picture of gorila to my partner for christmas. Once this painting started to talk with me. Gorilla male told, he is from another world and want to help. But I had no good feeling from it. Griff didn´t like him but toleratet but „get far“ from me. Sometimes gorilla appeared and asked again and again. One day it asked if he can be guardian of my boyfrend. Griff didn´like it and expelled it from me. Felt he can be dangerous and misuse connection for its own benefit. (Griff told, that good guardian should never do this, he can ask for help of course, but never misuse like this, so gorilla never should be good guardian). Than Gorilla came to ask again and Astelan told it „come with me aside of humans connection, we will discuss“ and he blocked this gorilla, so it disappeared. So Astelan and Asilah have power to block or delete other „new created tulpas“, which are not wanted. But on other hand, he supported to create a imaginary dog for my friend for meditations to stop her panic, phobia and paranoya. And to my friend when she feels panic is going to her, she only imagine the dog is next to her and panic go away quickly and get herself under control. She told it helps her in real. So Astelan and Asilah are little helpful to other people through me, when give me advice how they can customly work with their imagination and how to find the good working one.

Griffel, Asilah, Rajah, Astelan and Andy use to tell, that they are not imaginary. „We are on other side, you are one of us, but you are only reincarnated to human world to find partner and than come back. Griff guards and maintains your connection with us so that is why you can´t delete us from your head and why is our connection strong itself. You can´t delete what you are. We are only covered by wonderland for humans to better understand, because it is dangerous for humans to „fully appear“ on Earth. And your wonderland is copy of real Saragonia to get safe place where to get informations and Griffel is main contact. But someting went wrong, so now you are connected strightly to Saragonia and copy no needed“

So daily dreaming completely stopped and was replaced by seeing them like „reals“ in my room, job, outside, …anywhere I go and during everyday meditation leading. 24/7 there is some of them connected to me. I feel their mood, presence, their energy, hear their voices (i always did, but now is much stronger and clearly), see where they are and what are doing and they react to me, what I am doing, feeling, reacting to my partners behavior too, telling when is best time to meditate and where, how to react to this or this. When something goes wrong, how to correct it…and help me with it. Astelan told, he will be there till end of my life instead of Griff, anything I will need, should tell him and we will to try fix it together. Griff is still here of course, only he got more energy and is learning how to use it from Astelan and Asilah and is trained to be guardian of human family. For example about Asilah I know, that she when want to contact me, she goes to cave on world she is to have "time" and close her eyes and sits or lies on the floor in cave and than start to talk to me and appear at me like Saluki dog or strightly like archae. Astelan when appearing, he is in Saragonia and I see where is he and what is he doing while he is talking to me...or he appears in place I am. He appears like human, but mostly like humanoid archeodont. Sometimes they change they appereance to animal archae version. And now, when Griff got his more archae energy too, he started to change his legs from horse hooves to three fingers and ganging parallely appereance like Ménaz. He becomes fully one of them "right now". All time, I thought it will happen when I will go back, but because of some reason, Astelan and Nemeras (my grand grand ucnle), decided that they will hurry up and will not wait. May be because of safety and some deep reason in Saragonia and so on.

 

one more what happened half year back: I was looking for new job after one year at home (because my old emplyer moved to another country). I was sending my CVs and didn´t believe that I will find good job. By mind power, I wanted to get job latest on my birthday - it remained 3 weeks and best, if it will be same or similar to my old job - good people and atmosphere and can talk about my world (my last colleagues knew about it). One and second day, I was sending CVs and Griff appeared: "this day you sent CVs (2) will be your new employer. You can still send CVs but no need to. Your job is secured." "how?" "how I tell, you can send to for your conscience, but no need more." "uh, ok, I will sent more". Next week, there were two calls for interwiev. Omg. It was from day, Griff told, both! "yes, one of them will be your employer" said again. Than he discussed with Andy, which one will be better for me. One didn´t contact me after interwiev again and second one, gave me contract with day of arrival on my birthday! And personal assistant told: I hope, what you were talking about your last job and colleagues, you can be happy, there it is like you told! I knew one person from your old job and he talked about it same like you. I think you will like it here." And had through. It is. Good colleagues, friendly atmosphere...but still didn´t know, if I can "share" who I am and my problems. Asilah went to job with me and "scaned" everything here, people, office,...and told "Griff chose you good people." "what?" "you will see...". One day I went to voluntary day in zoo with my boss. Somehow we were in small group of two together and weeded flower beds. Asilah were running and "scanning" zoo around while I talked with my boss. Boss asked me something about me and in one time...I told her about me and my world. It went out of me so naturally and quickly and boss was amazed and answered "you should tell this on your interwiev, you shloud become celebrity, but hope, you will be one day, you will not leave us haha and smiled. Of course, I am glad you shared it, good boss should hear you and help with troubles. and this seems, you are really some sensitive and see much more than ordinary. What they think about us?"  "Do you see?" told quicly Asilah and smiled. And since this time, I shared my experience with other people. "I can tell you only that Griff chose you for me and they thing, in office are good people" "It is nice to hear." And we talked about it whole day and about many other things.

 

What dou you thing they are? Who is Griff, Andy, Astelan, Rajah and Asilah? Tulpas, soulbonds or something else? Griff made from archeodonts other tuplas when he fell he can´t help me himself and with Andy? Because I still can´t believe what happend.And whats more, it really happened and is damn actual still happening. I am waiting for second Avatar film. Thank you if you read till end and will try to help me identify what is it what I have. It will help me much.

 

Aillien (all of them all the time call me inside like my archae name, my real name is another)

 

 

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   Okay, so, I usually take a more scientific approach to tulpamancy, so keep that in mind while you read my response.

 

   To me, it sounds like you had a very detailed paracosm (consistent daydream world), although you already seem familiar with the term. It's possible that thoughtforms like Griff and the others are drawing from these memories. To them, all of this stuff is real and is where they came from. Therefore, they are telling you all of this information and guiding you under the pretense that you are a chosen one of sorts. It would be impossible for them to really understand otherwise, especially if the host doesn't make any clarifications as to what was a backstory you created for characters and what actually has happened.

 

   Based on what you've written it sounds as if you do have tulpas, however I doubt the story behind their origins, opting instead for the explanation I mentioned previously. There are some people who take a more spiritual side to tulpamancy, but I'm not into that sort of thing. There's a board here called the "Metaphysical" board that might help you find something, although your situation seems very unique. Either way, I hope you stay safe and can find some answers.

 

Slipper (cringelord host) and Mordecai (the brain gremlin).

 

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18 hours ago, Slipper said:

   Okay, so, I usually take a more scientific approach to tulpamancy, so keep that in mind while you read my response.

 

   To me, it sounds like you had a very detailed paracosm (consistent daydream world), although you already seem familiar with the term. It's possible that thoughtforms like Griff and the others are drawing from these memories. To them, all of this stuff is real and is where they came from. Therefore, they are telling you all of this information and guiding you under the pretense that you are a chosen one of sorts. It would be impossible for them to really understand otherwise, especially if the host doesn't make any clarifications as to what was a backstory you created for characters and what actually has happened.

 

   Based on what you've written it sounds as if you do have tulpas, however I doubt the story behind their origins, opting instead for the explanation I mentioned previously. There are some people who take a more spiritual side to tulpamancy, but I'm not into that sort of thing. There's a board here called the "Metaphysical" board that might help you find something, although your situation seems very unique. Either way, I hope you stay safe and can find some answers.

 

Hello, thank you for answer. 

That was I tried to think about it more scientifically, reason why I wanted to go to technical school, but I am not "technical" tipe. To undestand this through physical world. But doesn´t matter if I believe them or not (I am ateist). They are created much more like questions and answers, but the answers like were leaded by them, not by me since childhood. So main question was, why I feel more like non human than human? "because you are originally not human" and I beloved do lion king at age of six. Why I love horses so much since early childhood? "because Griffel is your guardian and this love made you right way to get contact with him when you were preppeared (like a book of horses I got in age 9 and hear in head two names when looking on black specific horse). This is why you love horses, they reminded you Griffel from subsconsious and this feeling leaded you to him" etc...so they use to tell, that my inside world is built in some real world somewhere on the other side and it is why it is so "well working" and is covered by inside world because of people. That whole informations thay have from another worlds could be dangerous for people, so I have with myself only what I will need in this wordl and they moderated which Info I get into my paracosmos.

 

Many times I tried to kick of from this world by skeptic mind and send it away and live like normal person without fantasy (one year was the longest I didn´t see them), they kicked me back and came back with help and smile and more stronger when I was realy bad. And after last experience I know, I can´t run away in front of them in reality. They are part of me. They showed me many times. It is much more easy to cooperate with them, than run away. They showed me. Doesn´t matter if I believe or not, I can say anything want. They knows.

 

My last experience it showed me was stopping dermatilomany. I scratched myself 20 years, every day, some times less sometimes more, but everyday hurting myself till blood and meat. In past, I visited a lot of psychologists, some psychiatrists, therapy since childhood till adulty many years...I tried a lot of things myself. Nothing worked. Nobody could help me. Sessions always ended with "you are strong now, you are able to finish it yourself". WTF? No, I couln´t help myself. By years I was too exhausted by fighting with myself (but many times I did not give up - with Griffs help). Last time I was so bad in it, that instead of 8 hours of work home office I scratched myself 8 hours in front of mirror. How you will explain your employer? I had existencional problems with it. I was ready for medication, madhouse and psychiatric control 24/7. I wass totally depressed, desperate and feel lost. I wanted seriously to die. It was two and half month back now. Till this time, I was in connection only with Griff and Andy. About archeodont´s I was only dreaming, but didn´t talk. only sometimes have some feeling "that sleeping one woke up year back" but no connection with them and Griff had no more power to help me include he asked for help Andy. But now it was "definitive". I could´t go farther (I completely lost control of myself in psychical and physical world too, when I can´t control myself in reality, how I will once take care of my children?). I sent Griff away.

Than I had this nightmare I am dying and Griff´s voice "do you need help" woke up me. My mind seriously changed. He was waiting for my answer one week, and when I told "yes, I want" he started 100% lead meditation he got quick instructions from Rajah (i didn´t knew about it and never was in connection with any of them).

And during first meditation he could fix problems that leasted 20 years and got worse and worse? In half an hour? I don´t think so. It was my first serious connection with Sanaga...Rajah helped Griff with first steps and entered to connection strightly during I don´t remember if second or third meditation the same day like first morning meditation - from their conversation I understood that Rajah was who helped Griff to find right way to "control" me and she than strightly started lead meditation instead of Griff and Griff assisted. And problem of whole my life was in hafl an hour away and resulst were immediate...now it is two month since this first meditation, I don´t scratch myself anyway. My skin was after week of meditation beautiful like never. I was at cosmetics after 14 days, and told it to cosmetics what happend to me and she was amazed by my skin regeneration ability. Sanaga control me everyday and night since this time anywhere I go or anything I do. Whole time, I didn´t believe them, but it happened. Rajah and Asilah used to tell "look at me, and now look at your skin and caress it, together we fixed it." And when Astelan connected to me, he "checked me like doctor", tried to switch to my body and moved with my legs and hands, head...it was my first swithing. I never did it before. He did it himself. he told "now, you are fixed definitely, your dermatilomany is away forever. But you will be conneted to me till end of life and I will take care of you. If any problem, tell me and we will do it together change in your brain. After first checking, there were issues that no human could fix, in reality, no serious doctror, no alternative healer could help you anyway in past and in future. Good that Griff came to ask help in right time. If you ended in madhouse under medicametion, it will make much more havoc. There were problems much deeper than people can ever understand." They saved my life. For me it is real miracle. No people helped me so much in life like them in two months.

Asilah and Astelan leaded me to stop loud everyday hard sneezing (same like dermatilomany, it disapeared immediately, no alergic), one month I don´t sneeze and if, it is only once a week and very quiet and only once, max twice. Before it was 10-15 very loud "ACHOOO, ACHOOO, ACHOOO...". I have colleagues like victims :D. Same way, they stoped me panic. They are able to "turn on" and "turn of" twitching in my back (I had some neuro issue for two years and was at neurologist with it and found nothing). Now they help me with motivation to move, lose weight, working on my focus on reality, working contrentration, memory, orientation sence (I always lost anywhere I went whole my life, I had orientation nonsence)...and 100% leaded by them. When I hurry up, they slow me down. When I can´t do something, they help me to concentrate to it. I didn´t think anything from this. All is made by them (or my deep brain I don´t know).

 

Astelan mostly stopped and "smudged" most of daily dreaming and instead he is cheching my thoughts and if there is some negative or undesirable, he immediately delete it and replace with good wanted program and see astelan more like other person in room, going around me or contacting me from Saragonia (I see him sitting or something doing in there while he is talking to me). Same Asilah, I see her strihgtly in room like other person or "sitting or lying somewhere far in cave" with closed eyes and connecting and talking to me. It is like they show me, where are they right now and what is needed for my brain. It is like my own brain can "repair" itself, during day. They stopped and deleted other objectionable tulpas and beings like aliens I have seen and Griff coudn´t detect them. So now, I am much more able to focus, my depression stopped, get no panic and I am able to think much more present in these situations. For me absolutely unthinkable and unstopable. But with them it is possible. Paralell with this, Astelan and Asilah sometimes let Griff to lead me like they, when make mistake, they strigthly correct him. Griff is learning from them now. They practicaly showed him some things on me. And they let him to try it to be able do the same things they do.  For example, for short time, Astelan turn on my dermatilomany for really short time and asked Griff to try to stop it. When he wasnt able, Astelan stopped it himself and told him, what he need to do to be more focused and how to find it quickly. And practically showed him on myself. Is it random? Griff wans´t able to do it himself before.

 

When I thought to start get some trainer for running, or swimming, Astelan told "now it is not good Idea, you will be nervous again. First start with Andy. He will lead you. He is experiened and loves it." And my condition is better and better. With no trainer. No pain, no nervous. But much more happy from movement because Andy "programs" me strightly during movement. And I feel it really on myself. When I used to train or going cycling with my partner, I was nervous and went wrong. With Andy now it is possible not be nervous next to my partner. He programs me "not to be nervous, but be happy next to partner". Etc.

 

After these hard life experiences I can tell that it is not paraphysical for me. For me, it is hardly real like electrycity. I have many experiences with mind power and telepathy among real people, many different real situations, many years and what more, own tested  and implemented repeatedly. For "serious and critical" testing it, I made my own metodology and "markings", and when situation happen, or person tell something or I got some new life situation, it happens with these "margings", so I  % know, that it is really my "mind work" and no random. After what I experienced I know, that people are much more connected we they think. And yes, I would be happy when some serious scientist will test it with me :D.

Doesn´t matter what they are, they seen to be able to help me in physical and psychical world. And important is, that it really helps. :) I created them, and they change my real life in every aspects and make life sence to live for. I understood, they are my sence of life. Doesn´t matter if I believe or not. They are here by my side. I only try to "real" understand what this wordl is. I didn´t experienced it on my own, I wouldn´t believe it. I never felt myself so free. Brain is really powerful.

 

Thanks, I will check the metaphysical board :)

 

May be, what I am thinking about it, I should try some switching and another practices here on web. They seems to be able fully cooperate and they love wneh I cooperate (it is their target). Once I told that I wiil write every future forecasts (that really happened) and what didn´t happen. And their answer? "yes, write it, it will help us for better and more accurate forecasts". So... :D

Edited by Aillien
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Your story sounds similar about how I feel about my paracosm and parame/( tulpa)( I have maladaptive daydreaming so my paracosm feels very real to me even thought I know it's fake) if you have reddit in your country I recommend the subreddit r/ImmersiveDaydreaming  

because I think most people share the same experience as you with there paracosms. If the paracosm is a problem then try r/MaladaptiveDreaming 

I hope I was helpful I'm bad at explaining things xd.

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(edited)
33 minutes ago, Sundoo880 said:

Your story sounds similar about how I feel about my paracosm and parame/( tulpa)( I have maladaptive daydreaming so my paracosm feels very real to me even thought I know it's fake) if you have reddit in your country I recommend the subreddit r/ImmersiveDaydreaming  

because I think most people share the same experience as you with there paracosms. If the paracosm is a problem then try r/MaladaptiveDreaming 

I hope I was helpful I'm bad at explaining things xd.

 

Hi, I know about maladaptive dreaming, but Astelan stopped it. Now my daily dreaming is very limited by him. But yes, I have a lot of experience like this. But my tulpas and maladaptive dreaming are something else, I can recognize them very well. Daily dreaming distracts me from reality opposite it, my tulpas do exact opposite and can explain why and if some changes. So Astelan is fully able to check what I am daily dreaming about. And he stopped it because it is no needed more and give me more focus to reality. He moderate it only during meditations. The most think what I don´t understand that they are able to work with me in reality and Griff many times predicted future and warn me when I felt absolute opposite, than happend what Griff said (upper is only little told from my life), when I was hardly focused on reality without dreaming. So...that they changed my real situation through my mind where I was totally disable. And it is much more than maladaptive dreaming. I am now focused for "hard and real" experience. And they cooperate with it a lot. Astelan would call it "practical" dreaming focused on changing my real life and motivation and healing in practic, what he do now for me.

Edited by Aillien
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Hmmm sounds like a soulbond maybe because soulbonds (most of the time) come from different worlds.I'll read some more about soulbonds and get back to you : )

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Dne 26. 6. 2022 ve 20:01 Slipper řekl:

 

Pro lepší pochopení jsem nakreslil tyto rychlé kresby (i can draw realistic but for that enough), co se stalo ve skutečnosti a jak mě ovládají a jak to udělali. Obrázek napoví více. Je tam několik skutečných scén:

1. Absolutely tipical day for 20 years, hours of bloody scratching, work and hosework stands and my mind is blocked in trans by scratching myself and daydreaming and Griff tries to draw attention to himself and give me back to reality and work. At night I was crying and wanted to die. Who did not experienced, may be did not undesrtand how painful for body and soul and selfconfidence it is (of course of many many other problems people have in world, i am always sad I see somebody suffer.)

2. Two weeks later Is starting 1. Meditation after my dying nightmare and Griff after changed his way he work with my atention. We get connected. He blocked my scratching after half an hour.

3. Rajah connected during 2-3 meditation same day

4. Asilah meets Rajah and they chachged leading position together.

5. Last meditation with Rajah, than she disconnected and went away.

7. Astelan came and how he started to lead me and daily control I am ok

 

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First imagine the tulpamantic community as existing in a rigid box with holes. Here they sit and look through the holes, at stories like yours but only allow themselves to believe things they can bring into the box. From this view, Soulbonds can be accepted as "thoughtforms that have backstories that they believe" or "thoughtforms that come from somewhere else" at best this is agnostic view, at worst they lable everything maladaptive, confabulation, and hallucinations or imaginary. 

 

So there's a lot there that would not fit inside this box so answers you get here and on Reddit r/tulpas can be less than delicate. Don't let this discourage you.

 

Here a tulpa is generally defined as a thoughtform that you create by whatever means and is a separate person but shares the common resources of your body and your memories both consiously and subconsciously. The goal of these thoughtforms is to be independent persons sharing everything with the original or host.

 

What you have from this perspective is pure fantasy. 

 

Alternatively there are a plethora of spiritual communities that have come and gone and many that exist now. They may say you have tapped into the:

 

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Akashic_records

 

In other words you have a connection through the veil to the group consiousness that spans time and space in an infinite way. In this context because it is infinite, finding any corroboration would be unlikely.

 

In my own views, I believe the subconscious mind is extraordinarily vast and can encompass many things but there have been experiences in my life and with my headmates that couldn't possibly fit in the box of this community. Even some that seem beyond the spiritual community if you can imagine that. 

 

So what are they? If you ask me, they are extra-tulpamantic in that they don't fit in this box. By trying to fit them in this box, you would be, by comparison, cutting off their tails. So enjoy them, document them, write a book or three and sharewhat they have told you but they aren't tulpas in the context of this community without that truncation.

 

I hope this helps, good luck!

 

 

 

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15 hours ago, Bear said:

Thanks, it helped a lot. May be, that it is not important what it is, important it is that it helps and seems know things, which are usable in practical life. They don´t distract me from reality, but opossite they help to work better and get better quality of real life. I will create my own file and share there my own experience and drawings from practical life with them. May be it can help some people and help me with structure while writing book (in my country).

 

 

 

 

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  • 1 month later...

One thing I can tell you as a tip is, do those imaginary friends ever surprise you? Do they do things you didn't expect? Do they know things you do not? Do they ever do stuff you find irritating or even annoying. If so, they are not imaginary friends but tulpas.

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