Toaster's Rad Tulpa Adventure

[Toaster]

I didn't get back until really late last night so I didn't really have an opportunity to do much, I narrated to her a little bit through out the day but I didn't really tulpaforce all that much. I hope Luka isn't too mad about.

[Toaster]

I tulpaforced with Luka on her personality yesterday but I still wasn't getting anything. Today however I was listening to the song Yesterday by Atmosphere and I felt a wave sadness wash over me. I think this was an emotional response from Luka because there's no reason for me to feel sad over over the song because my dad is still alive so I'm thinking that maybe this was Luka.

[Toaster]

Normally I don't stay very long in the wonderland out of fear that I might have intrusive thoughts while I'm their and those thoughts hurt Luka. I went into the wonderland so we could work on her strut and just get her started on walking needless to say I should have stayed out. About 3 minutes in the intrusive thoughts started coming and they were all targeting Luka, I held them back for as long as I could but I think that one or two of them got to her I left her house and went far out into the desert thats north of her house and then I exited the wonderland after I regained myself. I really don't know what to do about this, I want to help but I can't if it keeps ending up like this.

[Toaster]

Me and Luka don't communicate vocally but we still talk, I ask her a question and then tell her to wake me up at certain times to signify yes or no. Last night I asked Luka if there were any other tulpa there with her she answered yes, twice. I kind of have an idea as to who the other two might be, when I was a child I had an imaginary friend who, according to my sister, I would talk and have conversations with, I would see him and play with him. His name was Chistopher, and yes that is his name its not an error. My sister "killed" him when I was still young but I guess he didn't die. The other tulpa I'm not entirely sure about, I used to be scared of the dark when I was a kid and whenever I was scared I would call upon Scar to protect me. The reason I'm not sure it's him is because I never heard Scar talk he just protected me from the dark so I think he might be a servitor or something, again I'm not sure. None the less one of them might be Luka's attackers, or it could just be intrusive thoughts. I'm going to try reaching out to them and hopefuly make things right, if I can't then I'll exterminate them to protect Luka

[Toaster]

Every night I ask Luka a question so last night I asked her if the other tulpa are hostile, she responded no. Well seeing as their not gonna harm Luka I've decided to keep them and get to know them again, the only thing is I have no idea were to begin. I can't hear Chistopher anymore and Scar never spoke to begin with, I don't even remember how Chistopher looks or sounds, I was wondering if I can give him a new form and maybe give Scar a voice or at least some form of communication. They might even be able to help me out with Luka, I just gotta reach out to them, the only question is how do I do that?

[Toaster]

I haven't really communicated with Scar or Chistopher, who I've renamed Stein, I did decide to make some changes. I gave Scar a form and a voice but it might be a while before he uses it. I've renamed Chistopher to Stein mostly because I feel like it fits better now and since I couldn't remember how he looked I've given him a new form as well. I've heard a few voices here and there and I've seen some things out of the corner of my eyes so I'm guessing that there way more developed then Luka, I don't think there complete yet though. I haven't talked to Stein since I was 5 and I haven't called upon Scar since I was 9, I didn't know about tulpas back then so I didn't fully work on every area. Now that I know that there tulpa I'll finish them. On a side note I've instructed Stein and Scar to help Luka with talking and moving around hopefully they'll help each other out and speed up there developments, I still feel that this is going to take a while though. I'm still not entirely sure on Scar though, I created him to protect me when I was scared of the dark and I talked to him and stuff but I would always parrot the conversation so at this point I'm not sure if he's even a tulpa anymore. I really hope he is because I really wanna hear his voice and hear him speak his own thoughts for once, but most of all I guess I want to thank him for putting up with me for all that time.

[Toaster]

I haven't done much with my three tulpa aside from my daily narrations. I've been busy but I'm hoping to be able to get a few sessions in this weekend. As for progress I've heard a few words in my head that I didn't expect so maybe it might be one of them trying to communicate with me.

[Toaster]

I've haven't really tulpaforced in about three days, I'm not giving up though I just needed to handle a few things with school first. Aside from that I talked to them occasionally and every once and a while I notice something out of the corner of my eyes, I think it might be Scar or Stein because I haven't worked on that part with Luka yet. Tonight or tomorrow I'll resume tulpaforcing and developing Luka, I asked Scar and Stein to help her out with a few things so maybe shes advanced a bit more while I've been gone. Also I finished visualizing Scar and Steins new bodies. Stein is a tall white man with red hair thats tied up in the back but the hair thats tied up doesnt go down, instead it kinda spikes out. He wear's a plain white dress shirt and some fitted black jeans, he also has black suspenders and black shoes. Scar is a tall man who wears a black suit with gray pinstripes and a gray tie. He wears a scarf and the scarf covers his eyes but not his nose, mouth or hair. He has black hair thats been combed forward but is kinda spiky. I still havent heard their voices yet but I'm not losing faith.

[Toaster]

I sneezed and I could've sworn I heard a voice saying bless you, I couldn't tell who it was though.

[Toaster]

I've been beyond busy with school these past few weeks I've hardly had a chance to tulpa force and I'm worried. I would talk to Scar, Stein, and Luka every now and again but it was only a few minutes and I wouldn't really hear anything. I'm worried about Luka, I haven't really had the chance at all to work with her and because of it I'm afraid I may have lost some of her. Thanks to Amadeus and his drawing of Luka I can picture her clearly now but I can't really feel anything though. I know she's still there but I don't know if I have to start from scratch again or if I can still continue were I left off either way I hope Scar and Stein can help me. I'm not worried about them since they've stuck around despite the fact that I had forgotten about them for years. I hope Luka's not mad but more importantly I hope Luka's still Luka.