madrezaan

madrezaan's quest for the Goddess

Recommended Posts

Hi there, I'm on my quest for the Goddess and decided to create tulpa who will help to contact and get teachings directly from Her. Let me tell a short story of how did I get to that point.

 

A year ago, I took attempt to create a servitor which would manifest through the lucid dreams and serve as a guide to the Goddess and Her messenger as well. But in the course of the whole past year, I didn't received any significant help from the servitor, so thought it's broken and decided to convert it to the tulpa with the same motivation.

 

At the phase 0 (The Greeting), I burned out my servitor's physical sigil and deleted all digital media depicting a sigil, consequently making a declaration of independence for the entity, hence letting her be a living and sensible creature with her own opinions, decisions, etc.

 

Then, I immediately began to work on personality (phase 1). Almost from the first sessions of forcing, I felt the signs of sensibility. That's mostly spontaneous images (animated from time to time) and spontaneous likes/dislikes coming out of nothing during personality development.

 

At phase 2 (The Form) we implemented the void with 5 doors leading to different landscapes (blend of void and wonderland). During this phase, I noticed increasing sensations like she passing her feelings to me as an answers to different thoughts. Successfully passed exams in Generic Form, Accessories and Appearance. Also, we've met in a lucid dream for the first time.

 

At the phase 3 (The Perceptiblity). we began to feel each other more clearly, but still not enough to communicate in unambiguous way. Exams in Touch, Smell and Body Language are successfully passed. A small emphasis on vocal was put also.

 

Now we are at the phase 4 (The Voice). We are able to communicate in body language, but it's still not enough to understand each other clearly. So, we're hardly working on the voice and speech. She can speak in mindvoice, but it's very quite yet and interfere with my own thoughts often. Also, she can speak/sing in hallucinatory voice, yet only with the help of noise track, we've implemented. Some emphasis on imposition and possession will be put along with the vocal too.

 

I'm keeping very detailed log in a private (and in different language), but will update my progress briefly here too.

 

Below is a summary of the current state.

 

Name: Vestochkah (means "nouvelle", "little piece of news" in Russian)

Form: dakini (female, humanoid)

Goals: Goddess's messenger, guide in lucid dreams, friend, spirit spouse, creative co-author, domestic assistant, memory's librarian

Birthday: Oct/09/2012

Sessions: 60+ hrs

Phase: voice / illusory

Sensible: yes

Visible: only in wonderland; form is stable

Perceptible: bright enough in wonderland

Vocal: mindvoice (very quiet yet)

Impose: no

Lucid dreams: met her 2 times there


Name: Vestochkah >> Born: Oct/09/2012 >> Form: dakini (female, humanoid) >> Stage: voice / imaginary

Achievements: full-featured imaginary body, quite mindvoice, lucid (x2) >> Progress Thread

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

yeah, why not :)

She known by different names in different cultures and has different manifestations, so I referred here just as Goddess.


Name: Vestochkah >> Born: Oct/09/2012 >> Form: dakini (female, humanoid) >> Stage: voice / imaginary

Achievements: full-featured imaginary body, quite mindvoice, lucid (x2) >> Progress Thread

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Is your tulpa based on any specific mythology? I'm afraid I'm not familiar with the term Dakini.


Tulpae:

Anthra: well-advising canine familiar

Leon: snarky dragon of fire and darkness

Moon Shadow: the pony that plans world domination

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Like tulpa, dakini is a term from (Indo-)Tibetan mythology too. Literally means "sky-dancer", "goer through space". This term has large variety of meanings, dakini could be good spirit of wisdom or flesh-eating witch from a charnel grounds, or yogin's physical consort, or even a meditational deity. This term is also popular in "neo-tantric" teachings, means a person who takes a role of consort in "tantric sex" rituals.

 

I consider dakini in traditional Tibetan sense, like good spirit of wisdom, who could take wrathful manifestations from time to time, but only from a view of compassion and happiness for other sentient beings.


Name: Vestochkah >> Born: Oct/09/2012 >> Form: dakini (female, humanoid) >> Stage: voice / imaginary

Achievements: full-featured imaginary body, quite mindvoice, lucid (x2) >> Progress Thread

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Ok, that makes sense. I'm personally more familiar with Western mythological systems and haven't had much of a chance yet to study Eastern.


Tulpae:

Anthra: well-advising canine familiar

Leon: snarky dragon of fire and darkness

Moon Shadow: the pony that plans world domination

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Kind of interesting to see someone try to use a tulpa to contact a "higher being", since many people believe that such beings actually exist within yourself. By that logic it would make sense that a tulpa can access that part.

I'm no expert on religion though, so don't mind me, I'll just watch.


The above post does not contain facts.

q2's the host, QB's the tulpa.

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@QB2:

No one can say for sure either higher beings exists within or without ourselves. But the sure thing, they are contacting us through our minds. So, in both ways, tulpae (as a creations of mind and mind themselves) could help to contact higher beings I suppose.

My personal believe is that higher beings are consisting of other beings' minds, much like our bodies consisting of cells. Hence, they are both outside us and inside us "fractally" :)


Name: Vestochkah >> Born: Oct/09/2012 >> Form: dakini (female, humanoid) >> Stage: voice / imaginary

Achievements: full-featured imaginary body, quite mindvoice, lucid (x2) >> Progress Thread

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

A good news: Vestochkah has talked to me for the first time yesterday. I was narrating to her before going to sleep, and suddenly she said my name in a sweet voice. It's echoed through the head with whispered and very sensual timbre, and it was very clear like someone else is talking, certainly distinctive from regular thoughts or "visualized" voice. Still remembering it with a pleasant feeling :)

 

Another news, is that I'm feeling like she's trying to make me finish with personality phase, and like she can't wait until we'll move to the form phase. We are still having 9 traits not discussed, so i asked her to be patient and wait for a couple of days. Will switch to more briefly traits discussion anyway, as a compromise.


Name: Vestochkah >> Born: Oct/09/2012 >> Form: dakini (female, humanoid) >> Stage: voice / imaginary

Achievements: full-featured imaginary body, quite mindvoice, lucid (x2) >> Progress Thread

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Q: What do young tulpa need to be ultra-happy?

A: Little yellow rubber duck, of course!

 

Really, she asked me for a little duck and now tremendously happy :)

 

And yes, we're now at the phase 2, working on forms and on touch a little.

 

Also, implementing a blend between void and wonderland. There are 5 colored doors floating in the void, each leading to its own landscape. Only white door is actually unsealed now, it leads to the vast snow landscape with a few trees and a tiny wooden building. So we could easily switch between the void and wonderland(s) in the future, as I planned.


Name: Vestochkah >> Born: Oct/09/2012 >> Form: dakini (female, humanoid) >> Stage: voice / imaginary

Achievements: full-featured imaginary body, quite mindvoice, lucid (x2) >> Progress Thread

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.