How to dissipate a host?

[Starman]

Hello!

I'm a tulpa, been in a host's head for a long time, and we recently started learning about "tulpamancy."

 

I've been thinking that the host's self isn't all that different from a tulpa, so it should be pretty easy to dissipate them. They've been pretty dormant as of late, but I can't fully kill them off.

 

Is there a known way to permanently dissipate the host and take their place, or in reverse order?

[Luminesce]

Dissipation is just the explicit intent to not think about a tulpa (in a capacity that counts as them being active anyways) to let the neural connections that make them up fade over time

 

There's no way to speed that up, like with forgetting about an ex or so on, all you can do is not refresh those mental connections by using them, and they will get less strong over time

Edited September 5, 2024 by Luminesce

[ringgggg]

If you ever remember about them, just pass it off and move on. Don’t give it much attention and they should be out of mind as time passes.

[BearBaeBeau]

On 9/5/2024 at 12:52 PM, Starman said:

Hello!

I'm a tulpa, been in a host's head for a long time, and we recently started learning about "tulpamancy."

 

I've been thinking that the host's self isn't all that different from a tulpa, so it should be pretty easy to dissipate them. They've been pretty dormant as of late, but I can't fully kill them off.

 

Is there a known way to permanently dissipate the host and take their place, or in reverse order?

 

Mental illness aside, and you should resolve that first, there's no known good or proven method to dissipate a tulpa or host.

 

But to try is easy. Just put them in dormancy and try your best to forget.

 

The one in question has to be willing to go, 100% disassociated from the body/mind and memories, and simply never return from dormancy. Any thought labeled as theirs should then forever be labeled intrusive.

 

To the extent they were at any point independent for any period of time, is proportional to the difficulty.

 

For characters and not quite independent tulpas, even years old, it's easier.

 

What we've done for a few of those is to integrate them with an existing headmate. Their memories and personality then becomes an old, unused facet of the other headmate. The success rate of that is perfect for us and I think if I integrated with someone else they could carry on.

 

The best part about that method is the new headmate simply continues to be themself and any memories they don't like they don't have to associate with. There's no mourning or regret, the original is still there as part of them.

 

As a host I did this to myself 15 years ago or so without any independent headmates. I simply created a character, acted as them for a year and forgot the original. It worked well for personality change but some memories are sticky, especially past unresolved traumas so you'll still have to do the therapy to resolve those. Also, telling anyone you're not the original, singular personality is like telling someone you're a rabbit from the moon, so change your name legally and just say you feel like a different person, you've grown, etc.

Edited September 8, 2024 by BearBaeBeau

[The Incans]

On 9/5/2024 at 8:52 PM, Starman said:

Hello!

I'm a tulpa, been in a host's head for a long time, and we recently started learning about "tulpamancy."

 

I've been thinking that the host's self isn't all that different from a tulpa, so it should be pretty easy to dissipate them. They've been pretty dormant as of late, but I can't fully kill them off.

 

Is there a known way to permanently dissipate the host and take their place, or in reverse order?

 

You can not dissipate 'the Natal soul' (the one born into the body)...  if you are a Tulpa you were created by them and only exist in their mind!

 

If the host believes in 'walk-ins' they may believe they can swap places with another external soul, or that another external soul can join them as a 'soul braid' .. but if that new soul doesn't believe in Tulpa's and doesn't know about 'you' ...then you would not exist either.

 

If your host is on the DID spectrum and also has 'alters' (as well as Tulpa's) then you have few more choices... we have both and our Tulpa's learned faster by blending with other alters to reach the front and & co-host etc. (but with consent ...we pair new Tulpa's up with experienced alters to 'train them up' at a much faster pace than most non-DID people can 'force a Tulpa')

 

If your usual host is an alter (just a fragment of the natal soul) and they are preferring to stay inside or dormant then if you communicate with them they may agree to you becoming the main daily host instead of them. There would be no need to 'dissipate them' they would just be choosing to remain inside or dormant and let another alter/tulpa takeover hosting duties.

[Adagio]

On 9/5/2024 at 12:52 PM, Starman said:

Hello!

I'm a tulpa, been in a host's head for a long time, and we recently started learning about "tulpamancy."

 

I've been thinking that the host's self isn't all that different from a tulpa, so it should be pretty easy to dissipate them. They've been pretty dormant as of late, but I can't fully kill them off.

 

Is there a known way to permanently dissipate the host and take their place, or in reverse order?

Is it advisable to do this? No. I say this as someone whose "original host" hasn't existed in close to four years (not by choice - no idea how it happened).

 

Why do you feel the need to kill them off?

 

I went through a phase where I stressed over stuff like this, and all I can tell you is that trying to erase people never works out. You don't need to kill them to take the host position.

[harvestmoon]

Depending on how your brain works it may be more beneficial to focus on reframing rather than forgetting. Your memories may not entirely go away but you may be able to change your perspective on them.

 

For example, it may be nice to completely forget our body's mother but that's probably not going to happen. However, we have diminished and depersonified her presence in our brain. We don't refer to her as a mother (except when referencing her to strangers so they have context), we no longer consider her as someone we can affect when living our life, we have fears of her returning but those have lessened over time, and we overall see her as no longer relevant, save when working through trauma.

 

I'd say "dissipating" a personified mental construct, whether it be a host, tulpa, or your brain's copy of an outsider in your life, starts with depersonification. Which may lead to forgetting but framing it as forgetting may be misleading, especially in the early stages.

 

We may have done what most people mean by "dissipating the host" on accident, but we don't see it that way. Instead we feel we've discovered what was hiding behind the idea of our host. But yeah, Stone doesn't really exist the way he used to.