vidoxi

Problem with feeling my tulpa's presence

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I'm not sure if there's a common term for this in the tulpa community, but what I mean by "presence" is the feeling you get when you know that someone is close by you, without hearing them, seeing them, etc.

 

Anyway, right from the start when I first starting making my tulpa, his presence felt very strong, and I needed only to think of him or say his name to feel his consciousness become more alert, and I knew without a doubt that he was taking in what I was saying.

We're continuing to make progress, but that feeling has faded so much that I can hardly tell if he's there sometimes. It's hard because now when I narrate it feels like I'm just talking to myself, and when I enter the wonderland it's much harder to find him. It's been quite a detriment so any advice on how this could be rectified would be much appreciated.

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I think we all had the same experience: It started with a boom then everything faded. Mostly the first-time enthuisasm made you feel what you felt, at least that's what I think.

 

Keep practicing (surprise, surprise), also try saying some mantras or self-hypnosis. I yesterday tried flash imposing and I felt her presence behind me. I focused on her until I truly felt that "someone's watching me" feeling on my back, then turned back. Rinse and repeat.

 

It was the first time I truly felt Martina's presence, I was shocked, I even touched her hands and face and felt a cold aura. For me it's easier to feel her when she is behind me.

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Sometimes they do go away for a period of time; there are people on this forum who said there tulpa went like inactive and hard to find for like a week is the longest ive read, and came back more 'powerful' and talking and what not. Dont fret about it just keep forcing and just talking to your tulps even if you think its not listening and itll all work itself out.

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Like others have stated, things may go off sporadically and frequently to where you feel as if the surging of emotions won’t stop, and then the experience reaches a plateau effect at times. And like what Mel Syreth stated about the first-time enthusiasm, something you could also do in relation to that is find any means (e.g. self-hypnosis, guided imagery, trance, meditation, etc.) to emulate those initial feelings you had before.

 

Here’s an analogy you could think of to get what I mean: A sport, like tennis for example, you may be too fixated with winning and losing. It may make you become hesitant and over-cautious because there’s something at stake. But if you want to reconcile when you reached certain pinnacles in the journey where you would make the breakthroughs, sometimes it’s best to forsake the outcome of the match, and simply have fun playing tennis.

 

It’s the same when you feel you can’t feel your tulpa’s presence, try to get into being nostalgic of any moments where you reached a certain apex in progress that made some breakthroughs for you and your tulpa. And if you don't have any significant history as yet, try to imagine what it would be like. Then forsake the outcome of waiting for them to respond, and just simply enjoy having fun remembering moments of what was/will be while you fixate on how their presence will be in time.

 

If you practice learning how to do something like that, it can be one of many useful mental trump cards if some circumstances in life bring your confidence down. It may feel like you’re parroting, but it’s really just mental prep on your end as a transient mode of reaching communication with them. As time goes by, don’t underestimate the naiveté, excitement, and paradigm shifts you had that made the breakthroughs into this. I always try to remember moments like when Eva first talked consistently for a good half hour or so, and how I was completely mind-boggled on what occurred.

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