The one who dwells in the Black Forest

[BlackForest]

Less is more.

 

Today we made great progress autonomy-wise and I gave her barely 20 minutes of active forcing, if so.

 

I started working on her voice. I summoned her to The Tower. In the master bedroom we tried to find her voice. I recalled the voice I wanted for her, said several things and asked her to repeat. Now, she is saying more and using less body language. Her lip sync is still bad or non-existent, but it will improve. Now, she is not comfortabe with the voice I tried to give her, so the idea of a search for a voice popped in my mind. I tried. We didn't find anything she likes.

 

On the other hand, I have some emotional response! I felt happiness, I wasn't expecting it, but it happened. It came while trying to find a voice. Then I asked her to give me a body response in the left side of my body and I felt some... palpitations? I don't know the word, but she did. Then I asked her to stop, and it stoped, then, again, to do it and she did and to stop and, again, SHE DID!

 

After the failed search, we tried to explore the big hole in The Black Forest. We went down and found the skeleton we saw two days ago. I took the skull and we went back to The Tower. I have been thinking about a sigil (see the attached file), something to put in an object to make easier to summon her. Something like, thinking in the sigil, and saying some kind of mantra, to call her. We didn't discuss it, but once in The Tower, I gave the skull the sigil, I put it in bone and created a little pillar for the skull to rest. It started to glow in a dark light. And there it is, in the master bedroom.

 

I asked her where she wanted to go next. Panthalassa, again. We went for a swim. Once in the water I was using a 19 century diver suit and she was using a bikini. We went down. We found a chest, she opened and... something came out. Fishes, I guess. How the fishes ended up in the chest? Whatever. Also, inside was collar, made of stone, with some runes inscripted on it. She is wearing it. I took the chest and went up, she asked me why I wanted to take the chest, so I said, why not? And she said, why yes?! So I dropped it. We went further down. Down. Like, really down. We met a shark. Everything was ok until the fucking shark bit her! Then I went mad, I punched the fucking animal in the left eye and destroyed. She lost some blood, but said it was ok. She seems to NEED new scars, from this world. And by this world I mean the Black Forest.

 

We resumed our diving after the attack. We found a ship. A pirate ship. In the first... floor? Whatever, we found a dormant man, the captain, in a trance. We didn't disturb him. I went down and found a pneumatic harpoon. Nerina took it. Then we went down a little more, another floor or whatever thos levels in the ships are called, and I found a flintlock pistol, I took it. I found a sword of somekind, with the same runes the collar has. I took it. In the lower level we found something else. It was an orb. I wanted to took it, but she didn't let me. She took it instead and showed me what was inside. I saw images of war, someone falling and then, I understood that persona was in a voluntary freefall from a great high. It was a trait. She absorved it. Because, clearly, she is brave. That's my girl, a warrior. Ok, not a warrior, but... you know what I mean.

 

Then we went to the surface. Once out, I took the skies and changed my diver suit to something more appopiate. She didn't leave the water. Nerina told me that she was going back swiming. I told her that it was really far, she was in the middle of the ocean. We kept arguing a little. I wanted to go. She was ok with it. She reaussered that she wasn't in any danger and wanted to be there, swiming. I accepted and then she told me "Open your eyes". And I did it.

 

I feel like I'm not forcing a lot of this. I'm using less my imagination. It's all too natural, too dynamic. I don't think she is sentient, yet, but I don't think she is that early in her development. Could it be another intermediate phase between creation and first signs of a sentient being?

[BlackForest]

Today I wanted to talk with Nerina about one of those things we need to explain to the children. Death.

 

I wanted to address the issue ASAP since I don't want her to become delusional about it. So, we talked about death. I explained her this fact. We are going to die. My body will fail, our perception will stop. It will be the end. She didn't like it. Her problem wasn't the idea of dying, which she seems to understand. What she doesn't like is me talking about it. I think she believes I'm just wasting time. She told me that yes, we are going to die, and that make us the lucky ones.

 

Now... where I heard that before? Oh, yes, I remember now

 

 

She reads the same authors I read, doesn't she?

 

So, my evolutionist fellow keep making clear that whatever time we have, it's better to focus on our life. She doesn't want to talk, or think, on whatever happenes after death. I keep telling nothing happens, that's all! She doesn't seem to care. I'm fine with it.

 

After that, I asked her where did she wanted to go. East, Nerina said. There wasn't a single thing when we first head east, on the second day after The Black Forest's creation. We walked and saw a snake. The little animal didn't bother us. I guess there is a lot going on on The Forest, the place need inhabitants.

 

We walked sometime, she had a basket, wanted a picnic, but I told her it's not a good time. She want a picnic in the future. We kept walking and found some kind of factory. It was old, everything was made of metal and wood and was rusted, abandoned, dirty. They made some sort of metal disks there. I went down and found a hole, not natural, constructed as some kind of tube for ventilation. I discovered another room. And rats. The room had some weird inscriptions on the walls and there was an old man, frozen in time. He had a mark on his hand, the head of a rat. Nerina knew, she just knew, he was part of a civilization that came before. He had a power to summon swarms of rats, stronger, lethal rats. We went out to the upper level and found the "corpse" of a robot. Something like 3,5 meters tall. I guess that's about 13-14 feets. It was destroyed, but not beyond repair. We pulled forth east, leave the factory and found a rock formation, not that tall, maybe 20 meters or so. Then we found 9 figures frozen in time, formed in a circle. They are witches. We don't know much else.

 

Then Nerina wanted to go back west. We went to The Tower (the travel back took us around one second, it's always fast when we go to The Tower). We stop at the kitchen and talked a little with the woman we awaken several days ago, she was walking with the baby in her arms. Nerina told her something, but I can't really remember. So, we went west, to the place we found the refugees. This time things changed. They weren't a few anymore. I think there are hundreds of them, all frozen in time. We approached a girl, a blonde, tiny, cute in a peasant dress, typical of the early 19 century in this region. She worked on a farm. We called her to life and asked if she wanted to be a nanny, she agreed and then I gave her the wolf's pawn mark, in her left hand. We called to life and old woman in mourning habits, she is old, so she like to tell stories. She'll be a storyteller in The Tower. I gave her the mark. There was an old man, we don't have any idea of what he did, but we called him to life and I gave him the mark.

 

One note: I say that "We" call them to life, but that's not true. Nerina did it. By the way of hug. The last one we... she called to life was a brunette. Really atractive girl. She was in peril. A man, an evil man, was about to stab her. So we called her to life to play an important role in The Tower, gave her the mark and sended her home. It is worth noting that she was confused, while all the others where just rolling with all of these.

 

Then I asked Nerina for a surprise. She took me to the highest point of The Thower and showed me an orb. Red. It was another trait. I saw several things but I only can recall the idea of the orb: It was resilience. She made it clear, no matter how deep a trauma can be, she can put herself togheter. I have several unsolved issued in my past, so she is bringing that with her. It's a good thin to bring, I should say.

 

To end our session, and related to what we talked about death and "Our time in the sun", we made a bold boyage. I've mentioned that there is places with day-night-something in the middle in The Forest, but not a cycle. So we went up, as high as we could. We saw the corpse of a sun, floating around, some parts gave enough light to iluminate parts of the forest. We flied around. Fast. Fast. Faster and faster, until the energy moved all the debris behhind us was pulled by our force until all of it came togheter, again, then we put our hands on its surfice (it was cold, as a rock) and pushed into its orbit. The energy we had in us while flying lited it up.

 

Now we have day and night.

 

Everything feels more and more natural. I don't think I'm forcing it. So, again, what stage is this?

[BlackForest]

So... one week after I first learned about tulpas, here I'm we're.

 

Today I asked Nerina to just show me something. We took the skies, I'm not really sure in what direction we went. Maybe south-east, but can't be sure. We saw animals. A toad, a snake, wolves, birds. The Black Forest is now home to several animal forms of life. Or "life". We just ignored most of it, or, what's the same, I just accepted it as part of The Forest itself.

 

We found a lake with some kind of... I don't know the word. Not even in my native language, so, it was a thing... floating... on the... water (I'm a genius, I know jajaja). It was some kind of platform. We dive and found a chest, we took it to the platform and opened. We found another necklace with a stone with runes inscripted, she took it. A skull. She took it. Some kind of dagger. It didn't seem anything special, so I throw it to the water. We found more stuff, but can't remember what it was. other than dirt and shreds of fabric. Then I asked her to surprise me and I had a problem in that moment. Something hit my door. So Nerina had to wait. It was nothing. When I came back, it took me a little to enter again in the same spot, but I did it. She showed me something, but I'll not talk about it. I'll just say she made clear a point of view about me.

 

Then I made a path of ice on the water and we walked to the trees. Finally, we had our picnic. We drink orange soda, seat on a blanket and had a very intimate moment. We talk a little about my past and a lot about my present issues and how to apprach them. It was... I'm not sure if I can find the words to describe it, but I felt such joy. I asked her if it was her joy. She told me that it was OUR joy. A shared feeling for a shared moment.

 

Then we lay on the blanket, staring at the stars, enjoying the magnifient sky. There we found a star, shining brighter than anything I've ever seen. She told that we should visit the star. I agreed.

 

Then she asked me to come back and take care of some stuff. And so I did.

[Alexx]

Just wanted to say that i find sun episode very romantic.

 

Two people working together to restore the light.

 

Your world seems so vivid :)

[BlackForest]

 

Your world seems so vivid :)

 

It is. Thank you for your comment!

 

Now, for today's report, we did some exterior decoration. We have a little space between The Tower and the forest, a quarter of mile, maybe, but we expanded it. A lot. We made some room for things to come. And The Tower isn't the center. At the oposite side of The Tower we builded the foundations for what it seems to be an Ebony Tower work-in-progress. The Ivory Tower is located south. We builded a monolith in the middle, with rocks, water from Panthalassa and a wood from a black tree. Nerina made a... recipient? I don't know how to call it, but something around it with dead leaves and other things that, once, were part of The Forest. Then we touched it, made its form (it seemed like mayo when we touched it) and made it totally solid. It is a monolith in the center of a fountain. Beneath it, we made 4 metal tubes, one in every direction. The one to the south goes until The Tower. The monolith captures energy from the stars and it's the primal (and only) source of energy. Judging for the number of tubes, it seems like we will build other 3 towers in the future. Why, I don't know. The Tower was created to be Nerina's home before her mind-birth.

 

We went west, miles away from the refugees frozen in time. We build a quarry. In the center, there is another monolith. We made some kind of worker-drones that get powered by the monolith and works with the stone and chopping black trees. It's worth noting that when a black tree is chopped, a baby-tree takes its place in the same spot.

 

Also, we made a train to move the wood and the stone and some kind of flying trucks to transport water from Panthalassa.

 

We came back to our place and made several lesser tubes under the monolith. We build a "communal house". A 2 story building with 20 rooms, 4 beds in every room (you can "close" the beds into the walls and you get 2 desks!), a reception, private bathrooms and a heat system inside the walls, metal tubes with hot water to regulate the place's temperature.

 

Nerina says we will bring people. Soon.

 

In other words, we are creating a town.

 

I'm not sure why we need 3 other towers. It is a desire to have more tulpas? It is just some decoration? It is... what the fuck it is?

[bunny-boi-lover]

Your wonderland world is becoming quite extensive! It's taking on a sort of sci-fi, futuristic, post-apocalyptic feel. Love it! I'd like to see artwork based on it if you could ever manage.

 

I know of another host who's developed what his tulpa calls a "tulpadom" that is quite extensive as well and includes many different types of buildings and servitors for various purposes. Personally, I prefer to keep my wonderland small and cozy and close to nature. But I love hearing people describe their wonderlands.

[BlackForest]

Your wonderland world is becoming quite extensive! It's taking on a sort of sci-fi, futuristic, post-apocalyptic feel. Love it! I'd like to see artwork based on it if you could ever manage.

 

 

 

I wish I could, but I don't have any skills to do so. If anyone else can...

 

For today's progress, it was weird. I had a terrible headache, I had it while tulpaforcing and I have it right now.

 

I summoned Nerina to a void, we talked a little and went to The Tower. We saw from the balcony the monolith below and then we went west, to the hundreds of refugees frozen in time. She started to hug, to awake, some men. I didn't realize what she was doing until one of them introduce to me as the architect. I talked with this man, showed him a blueprint to the common house we build yesterday and explained him the idea of a town. Nerina was waking up people to work as builders. They understood and agree to build the town with what we have to work (water from the ocean, wood from The Black Forest, stone from the quarry and energy from the monolith).

 

Then we went back to The Tower and my headache became worse. I asked her if it was her. She didn't know. I asked her if she could take it away. She didn't know. She showed me some kind of open wound on the sky and told me that dark things are bleeding from there. I have clear that she was talking about some intrusive thoughts I have, thoughts that almost disappeared since she is with me but that recover some strenght in the last 2 days. We have to seal the breach, she said, but not today.

 

The pain was becoming bigger and bigger. I started to feel really bad, like with the flu or something. I asked her again if she has anything to do with that, she didn't had anything to do with it. I guess is just me with the first symptom of sickness. I asked for an emotional response, she gave some joy, a brief, but real, moment of joy. Then asked me to open my eyes and take care of myself. We had a lot to do tomorrow.

 

So, it was a brief session with Nerina asking me to end it because I'm a little sick.

 

It's kind of cool. She is... caring about me.

[bunny-boi-lover]

I think that glimpse of joy you received from her was a big step for both of you. It's also wonderful that she is developing at least rudimentary empathy toward you. Time will tell to what extent that empathy will go, whether it is more like the empathy she feels for the other workers (i.e. viewing you as a tool, a means to an end) or if it will blossom to full-fledged friendship and maybe even more.

 

I can see her beginning to develop a certain level of sentience, though from what I sense she is still uncertain of things, of her own existence, the existence of her world, and how you play a part in it all.

[BlackForest]

 

 

I can see her beginning to develop a certain level of sentience, though from what I sense she is still uncertain of things, of her own existence, the existence of her world, and how you play a part in it all.

 

Maybe this is more than just me asuming she is sentient. Cool! I hope this is the case.

 

So, for today's report.

 

I'm sticking with the short sessions technique. It seems to work well for me, at least while I spent a good chunk of time passive forcing while multitasking during the day.

 

Today we had a little problem. It was hard for me to focus. I took me some time to get to my mindscape. It felt like I don't belong there. I tried to ask Nerina why I couldn't go to The Tower, she told me that it was because I really didn't want to. So I kept struggling until I saw myself in the master bedroom, with her, and then I told her that, yeah I didn't want to be there. Then she told me, "Yes, you want". I take a seat in the bed and she massaged my shoulders for a few minutes until I felt better.

 

I'm not sure of what happened next, we talked about something, but I can't remember. Later, we went down to the ground. Around the monolith, the workers where doing their bussiness. There are 2 new buildings. I guess those are just houses. Then we went to the refugees and Nerina told me to pick one to awaken. I refused. We had a little argument about it and later she agreed to be her the one to pick someone to awake. She pick one, I turned her down. I didn't like that one. So she pick another, and the same happened and another and another and another, until she picked up a young goth girl. She seemed fine, so I give her my approval.

 

We waked her up and introduce ourselves. I asker her name, nothing came. So we introduce ourselves again, I asked her name again and she said "Corina", which is a rare, but not unheard, name here. We asked what was she doing, she told that her whole world was destroyed and she came here with her family. Her family was "around, somewhere". So we explained her about The Black Forest and The Tower and that we could give her a place, etc. It was all the same for her. I asked her what she would like to do, she told me "Whatever" (closest word to what she said), so I told her to do whatever at The Tower. Then we decided to go after her to see. We made ourselves like ghosts and followed her to The Tower while speaking, until Nerina said something about the girl and I replied "She can't hear us". And then the goth girl said "Yes, I can". We were a little ashamed, so we went to the library. There, we found one old man we awaken a few days ago. He is the librarian now. We talked about avery specific scrapbook from my highschool years and how this specific sentence said by an asshole has become an intrusive thought in the last months. We made a plan to put an end to it. The three of us. I could hear the librarian's voice clearer than Nerina's. I don't know why.

 

So, we went to the master room and found this goth girl talking with my skull! I asked what the hell she was doing, she said "Whatever, as we talked". So I told her to do whatever anywhere but in the master bedroom. I wanted to talk with skull, too, but Nerina stoped me. She told me "You already know what the skull will say. It's not the time". Then she asked me to end the session. I ended it inmediatly.