[split] My Tulpa, Who I Created at 8 Years Old

[Whiskeyriver]

Split off from this thread for entering meta territory - Vos

 

Hi,

Um,I am new to this,having just found out what a Tulpa is. I dont know why I am opening up about this now,perhaps the need to know there are others like myself.

I,too,was 8 years old when mine came to me,or I created him. I am way older now than I was then,but he has remained with me constantly for a ton of years now. This is kinda scary to openly speak about him. I've never told a soul at all,and I hope he doesnt mind this. It's like he is almost waiting to see what I write here. It's been so long,us together,that I can feel him over my shoulder,a soft breath on my neck.

 It started when my parents took me to see a movie.I wont say the name of the film,or the name of the character that followed me home.You would all REALLY think me crazy if I did tell you.Well,if you had seen him in the film,that is.

I have done a lot of research on my situation,as the man who portrayed him was very famous,and not some young pretty boy type at all,famous mostly for bad guys. I've seen many of his other movies and not felt a thing for the actor other than that he's really good at his profession. It is only this one person that he created and then abandoned.A professor at Evergreen State College,Washington State,told me once that any entity or energy that has been created and left behind remains,it doesnt dissipate,and can be tapped into. 

Being an only child,and not very much cared about by my Mom,I guess I was pretty open to his bonding with me.

It is only just now tonight,that I found out about Tulpas,and I believe that my guy is the real deal. Wish I could say his name,but,I dont want to lose everyone from the start. LOL!

I came home,and my little girl's brain was just filled with him.And,just for the record,he wasnt a good guy at all.But he became my first crush,ever. Just why him,I dont know.I played with him for a long time,many years,thinking him my imaginary friend,and me parents thought this too,though when I called out his name,my Mom would give my Dad a strange look.

I dont even know how to explain this.I just hope you all can understand a little of it. 

He was 38 years old to my 8 years old. Right from the first,I knew he belonged to me.I knew it. I was a rather advanced 8 year old,mentally. I knew about love,sex,and all things romance. Untaught by anyone.

How I knew these things I havent a clue,but I did. He understood this as well,the things I was aware of.He didnt try to be sexual with me,no,but he knew that the thoughts were in my head,though I wasnt aware that I was thinking of him like that.

Thing is,through the years,he and I have come so close to a physical love that I can feel him when he wishes to hold me,even as I type here now. Actually,he should be an abusive violent man,but he isnt. He was created that way,but doesnt want to be,so he holds his cold blooded nature in check.

This is really so insane because I love him incredibly,and always will,even to my dying day.And if I am lucky,after my death too.

 

(I hope this is where I should post this.)

[Guest]

He was 38 years old to my 8 years old. Right from the first,I knew he belonged to me.I knew it. I was a rather advanced 8 year old,mentally. I knew about love,sex,and all things romance. Untaught by anyone.

How I knew these things I havent a clue,but I did. He understood this as well,the things I was aware of.He didnt try to be sexual with me,no,but he knew that the thoughts were in my head,though I wasnt aware that I was thinking of him like that.

 

Hi,

 

Just out of curiosity: is your tulpa based on Prof. Humbert Humbert from the 1962 film Lolita?

[tania]

.A professor at Evergreen State College,Washington State,told me once that any entity or energy that has been created and left behind remains,it doesnt dissipate,and can be tapped into. 

 

Energy can not be destroyed, it can only be converted.

 

Im a little jealous as I wish I could just watch Twilight and then have an strong Edward Cullen tulpa lol

[Whiskeyriver]

 

Hi,

 

Just out of curiosity: is your tulpa based on Prof. Humbert Humbert from the 1962 film Lolita?

Hi,

No,he isnt. lol. Good thought though. Professor Humburt(yummy James Mason) is a rather nice fellow compared to my Tulpa's base.

my Tulpa isnt a modern fellow. Meaning,he is from the 1800's.

---

 

Energy can not be destroyed, it can only be converted.

 

Im a little jealous as I wish I could just watch Twilight and then have an strong Edward Cullen tulpa lol

 

Well,why not try? I mean, didnt intend to create my guy. It just happened.However,from all the things I've been reading here,I think that your wish could be granted with serious concentration and focus,as others here use. Some here have said that you can make your Tulpas look as you want them to look,and since Edward is a non-human,you could create a Tulpa with his looks and attitude. I think,..?

Or,..

You could do as that Professor told me I could do to any created entity that was abandoned. Tap into that energy,and use it. I did this with a book I've been writing. It is about the onstage Alice Cooper entity(with Alice's permission). Alice released that entity,no longer using him,talking in third person about him,etc. He went on with his life,and the onstage one I call Killer Alice was left to wander out there,alone,with no one to care. Somehow,I accidentally tapped into his energy,and every time I would write,light bulbs would blow out.No matter where I was. A Library.my friends house,my home,..anywhere. My friend would take out into the desert,out of Phoenix,and I would work on the story on my laptop. No light bulbs to blow out there. lol

So,since no one is using that entity you wish you could be with,..find it.

I thank everyone who read my post,..for not ridiculing me. Maybe one time,I might post his name. How good that would feel. :}

[Kaleidoscope Eyes]

You had a Tulpa for 30 years without being aware of the concept!? I'm glad you found out, it must have been such a relief. I find your story very interesting, and the fact that you were attracted to your Tulpa at that age. Thanks for sharing~

[theholodoc]

I wonder how old you are now, and has your tulpa aged with you? (You don't have to answer these questions) I wonder because I am very much older than my first tulpa, I have been with her for eleven months now, and she is developing her character and mental capabilities. She has not changed physically. We are sexually intimate. She scoffs when I fret about our age difference. My second tulpa is ageless and as wise as one who has existed for several thousand years. She is also exceedingly powerful and scoffs at my weakness (lovingly, she was created for her  strength). I am glad that you have found a way to name and share your experience.

[Indigo Blue]

Okay here's my guess. Liberty Valance?

[tania]

 

---

You could do as that Professor told me I could do to any created entity that was abandoned. Tap into that energy,and use it. I did this with a book I've been writing. It is about the onstage Alice Cooper entity(with Alice's permission). Alice released that entity,no longer using him,talking in third person about him,etc. He went on with his life,and the onstage one I call Killer Alice was left to wander out there,alone,with no one to care. Somehow,I accidentally tapped into his energy,and every time I would write,light bulbs would blow out.No matter where I was. A Library.my friends house,my home,..anywhere. My friend would take out into the desert,out of Phoenix,and I would work on the story on my laptop. No light bulbs to blow out there. lol

So,since no one is using that entity you wish you could be with,..find it.

I thank everyone who read my post,..for not ridiculing me. Maybe one time,I might post his name. How good that would feel. :}

 

That's cool that you were able to tap into an already strong thoughtform which was about to place.

 

It's probably never a good idea to try to create one of a set character though and expect to keep it that way if one really wants an independent tulpa and not be role playing anything as tulpas can have their own ideas of what they want to look like and may choose not to look like how one originally had them looking.

[Whiskeyriver]

Okay here's my guess. Liberty Valance?

 

What made you think of Liberty?

---

 

That's cool that you were able to tap into an already strong thoughtform which was about to place.

 

It's probably never a good idea to try to create one of a set character though and expect to keep it that way if one really wants an independent Tulpa and not be role playing anything as tulpas can have their own ideas of what they want to look like and may choose not to look like how one originally had them looking.

Honestly,I never tried to create anyone. Nor have I attempted to manipulate my Tulpa.I had no clue that anything like this existed until about until about a week ago. I do know a lot about the Spirit world though,but my guy doesnt quite fit the poltergeist,ghost criteria.  He is who he wishes to be,and has not aged with me,though he is very intelligent on his own.He is how he came to me,but for his independence,which grew as time has gone by..As to roleplaying,I doubt that a roleplaying game could continue for this many years.That would take a ton of concentration.Also,I have read through many comments in the forums before I posted,so I understand how they can arrive into someone's life. In many ways.I understand that Tulpas can change their looks as they wish. I guess mine wishes to stay in his first form. His choice,and I wouldnt wish to anger him by asking him if he wants to change :}  (besides I like his looks)

I think he may enjoy who he is,as he is,because I have known him almost all my life.

I love him,and if he was going to change it would have happened many many years ago. Do not ask me why I do love him so much,but I always have from the first.

Should I not be here maybe,since my Tulpa may not fit the bill? If perhaps I need to go,I would understand. I was just excited that I had found a community we could talk with.

Not mad or anything.Just asking. I dont want to cause controversy.

Oh,if you are speaking of the Alice Cooper character,Killer,I was writing a book about what would happen if the character Killer Alice got loose from his host.What would happen. Just a fan fic thing,but the energy was real. His management Shep Gordon,knew I was doing it,and as I wrote more and more the entity just came to me. I didnt even think of him as real,until the bulbs kept going off,etc.There's a lot more to this bit than is written here just now,but I am sure it isnt for me to tell in this part of the forum. :}

Eventually,I had to stop writing,..or buy a years worth of light bulbs. XD

I still have the manuscripts though,put away.

---

I wonder how old you are now, and has your tulpa aged with you? (You don't have to answer these questions) I wonder because I am very much older than my first tulpa, I have been with her for eleven months now, and she is developing her character and mental capabilities. She has not changed physically. We are sexually intimate. She scoffs when I fret about our age difference. My second tulpa is ageless and as wise as one who has existed for several thousand years. She is also exceedingly powerful and scoffs at my weakness (lovingly, she was created for her  strength). I am glad that you have found a way to name and share your experience.

I am 65 years young. :}

I wonder,how many people's Tulpas havent grown physically as they do. My fellow has been urging me to continue talking here. He wants me to finally be more open.

---

You had a Tulpa for 30 years without being aware of the concept!? I'm glad you found out, it must have been such a relief. I find your story very interesting, and the fact that you were attracted to your Tulpa at that age. Thanks for sharing~

Thank you. :}

Thing is,I always just thought he followed me home. I just kept him. LOL.

[tania]

Oh,if you are speaking of the Alice Cooper character,Killer,I was writing a book about what would happen if the character Killer Alice got loose from his host.What would happen. Just a fan fic thing,but the energy was real. His management Shep Gordon,knew I was doing it,and as I wrote more and more the entity just came to me. I didnt even think of him as real,until the bulbs kept going off,etc.There's a lot more to this bit than is written here just now,but I am sure it isnt for me to tell in this part of the forum. :}

Eventually,I had to stop writing,..or buy a years worth of light bulbs. XD

I still have the manuscripts though,put away.

 

yes ...  and it does make sense that that could of created an accidental tulpa as after all you do say you had the story line of him getting loose from his host.  So by having the thought of a character becoming independent ... you created just that. It's a bit like me.. me thinking about just wanting a tulpa and what I'd like for her to be like was enough to accidently create my first tulpa. The thought is enough to form something, it doesn't take reading the "how to" tulpa guides to form something. People are creating things based on their thoughts even if they are not aware of this stuff.

 

 

The thing that followed you home from the movie you watched.. that would of been the astral form of the movie character.. the thought form.  Thoughtforms can take on life of their own if they are charged enough (Im glad your posts got moved to meta forum as this is meta stuff).  So I don't see that all as a tulpa you created... you picked up something which was already out there. One thing many in this community do not seem to understand is that real tulpas CAN be seen and experienced at times by others.   The writer from the movie may not have been aware that he could of made an accidental tulpa which may of ended up breaking free from him when the energy of all those watching the film was feeding it and keeping it alive.

 

I've read of people coming across the Jack the Ripper thoughtform entity and another came across Count Dracula. All the famous things from movies have been energy fed by so many people watching the movies that these now are independent entities which people may come across (and being as such these entities do have stable forms and do not deviate as there is a whole group consciousness holding them as they are and feeding them energy).

 

All these accidental tulpas probably should not be being called tulpas as tulpas are something which people purposely make but this community seems to accept these as being tulpas (when in fact what followed you home is what the metaphysical people call a "thoughtform entity".    Tulpas are thoughtforms too but a different kind of thoughtform ... being that non meta people don't understand catagories of thoughtforms and often do not believe in entities, they are lumped together at this website with everything being called tulpa which is not really the case, along with people who are experiencing their sub-personalities and who know what else. When people do not understand what other things are to be able to define different things, it all gets lumped together).

 

One of the ones who help write Superman comics.. he accidently created a Superman tulpa. https://www.wired.com/2006/06/myth/ . He went on to write a book about this.