I'm getting worried I might be losing her

[Byakko]

sorry to hear you're going through that! 

 

i wouldn't worry about any possibility that you could lose seraphina forever or anything. tb has gone through similar phases multiple times over the years, it always fixes itself eventually. i do think it can be related to stress sometimes or anything that might cause some sort of brain fog or malaise

 

in fact i'm going through it too a bit and last night or this morning realized for the first time rena was forced to talk to me in tulpish because vocality wasn't working right. i never experienced it myself but i'm not too worried since i know from tb's experience it can happen

 

seems other people have suggested possible ideas to help so that all can be good to try. for us personally, the solution to most things is always "meditate" and if that doesn't work "meditate more" lol. if that doesn't work, "listen to adept meditators talk about meditation, then meditate" 

 

that doesn't seem to fit for everybody though. other things that cause brain fog for us is going to long without being outside or eating crappy foods. but it sounds maybe related to your memory you said resurfaced

 

i wish you luck and patience to get through it and finding what works for you

[Rhea]

7 hours ago, Byakko said:

i wish you luck and patience to get through it and finding what works for you

Thank you so much for sharing. I didn't realize this was such a common experience, I think that's a bit reassuring, although I'm sorry for TB that she went through that, and that you've experienced bits of it too.

Meditating just does not work when I'm in that state. But then again I'm not all that good at it yet, not good enough to effectively push through the fog and the random thought spirals when I meditate. But I'll keep working on it^^

[Ranger]

On 6/21/2025 at 9:35 AM, Rhea said:

If it's not insensitive for me to ask, how did you manage to, well, manage your trauma? How did you learn to better cope with it? 

I started therapy recently but it hasn't really been helping, at least not yet. My therapist says she wants to try EMDR, I'm willing to try anything at this point.

 

Sure! We'll share elsewhere though, we don't want to do it here 

[bunnymustdie]

On 6/21/2025 at 9:35 AM, Rhea said:

If it's not insensitive for me to ask, how did you manage to, well, manage your trauma? How did you learn to better cope with it? 

I started therapy recently but it hasn't really been helping, at least not yet. My therapist says she wants to try EMDR, I'm willing to try anything at this point.

I had a lot of good results using the technique from this book. The best way I can describe it is that it's like a strange visual meditation that someone else guides you through. It tries to work on the same subconscious stuff that hypnosis might try to address, but does not require you to be at the same deep level of relaxation. It worked really, really well for me. Gets rid of stubborn negative subconscious emotions and beliefs that quietly exerts their influence in the background all the time. With repeated usage, there was no "coping" with the trauma. It's just gone. I'd still remember whatever bad stuff that happened, but the bad emotions associated with the stuff is just no more. It's like a metaphorical pimple in your subconscious is popped, and the pus inside (trauma, nasty emotions, etc) is drained. Really stubborn or severe stuff might have some lingering traces left, which can be worked on more as they pop up.

 

It's not a popular technique because despite being in a self help book, the technique requires someone else to do it on you. And the author keeps nudging you toward the trained practitioners of that technique, who charges money for their service. If you have a vocal tulpa, you can just get the tulpa to read the book and use the technique on you. It's what I did. It felt like the technique is practically made for people with well developed tulpas. In your case you can probably just get your wife to help.

 

You can take the metaphysical stuff in the book, which there is not too much of, with a grain of salt and make your own judgement on them depending on your results. The main technique itself is a mix of meditation & visualization, and it produces results in the patients of the practitioners, regardless of their belief. The main theory in the book, about how the mind fragments off to quarantine a piece of trauma, etc, is pretty similar to a lot of common theories on how the mind processes trauma or the formation of DID.

[Rhea]

10 hours ago, bunnymustdie said:

I had a lot of good results using the technique from this book.

Thank you so much for your recommendation, I'll give the book a look and do some research on and see if it might help^^ As I said I'm willing to try anything at this point, though I wonder if doing two different trauma work techniques at the same time could be a problem.. So I'll try to do some research on the subject^^