Z-Byte's Happy Place

[Z-Byte]

Chrysala spoke my name this morning. This was the first time I heard a cohesive word or vocalized thought from her.

 

Happy feels everywhere.

[Z-Byte]

A thought occurs. Because I'm working with two tulpa now, and I don't want to risk alienating one while trying to work on the other more directly, I've come up with a clever scheme with, I think, the help of my tulpa Chrysala. Because Chrys's form is going to be much more complex and difficult to bring into being, as the ultimate design is really my own and I have no real way of drawing it well, I've decided to work on Amber Rose's form while focusing more on Chrysala's personality. I can much more easily imagine Amber, as a pony, walking by my side and doing these cute, childish things that I can picture her doing, while the more mature form and personality of Chrysala is going to need much more work and more concentration than I can provide right now. My life, sadly, is just so stressful that I can't sit down and focus without thinking about all of the problems I'm going through at the moment.

 

But a pony is a pony, and much easier to work with, especially because I want her personality to pretty much develop on its own. This is an image of Amber Rose I made with Zod's creator, and the idea behind this image is one of the first things I imagined her doing: playing with a beetle in my wonderland. Poking at it with her hoof, watching it buzz and crawl, accidentally knocking it over onto its back and then rolling onto her back to join it before picking it up and letting it walk across her hoof. Then watching it fly away and giggling about it.

 

That scene just played out naturally in my head when I thought about her. I don't know if I had subconscious help in that visualization, if my creative mind just works like that on impulse due to all the stories I've made, or what, but damned if it didn't cheer me up.

 

So what do you guys think about this idea? Working on one tulpa's personality while focusing on another's form?

[Guest Anonymous]

I think that its fine as long as you can manage splitting your focus like that.

 

Just to be clear, one is sentient and the other isn't? That's the vibe I'm getting.

[Z-Byte]

That's kind of how it feels, I suppose, though to be fair they both feel sentient to me. Amber has felt sentient ever since her name popped into my head not too long ago. Chrysala just feels much stronger and gives me more thoughts and ideas than Amber does right now, so she feels like the more mature of the pair. She's also the only one I've heard more than thought-speech from.

 

Amber is quiet in my mind, though the personality and thoughts I get from her are generally childish, playful and sometimes a bit cocky, traits that I didn't expect or plan for. Considering I didn't expect or plan for her at all, that's not entirely surprising.

[Z-Byte]

I spent all day visualizing Amber walking by my side at work. I woke up this morning feeling like my muscles were made of warm glue. Not sore, as if I'd worked them to death, but I just felt a very powerful fatigue. I just did NOT want to get out of bed. Same with Amber and Chrysala. I guess forcing might take a lot out of both parties.

[Z-Byte]

I arted my Tulpas, at least in the basic way I can see them in my head. Chrysala is different because her form seems to shift and change on me very often. I think I just need to focus on it more...

 

Anyway, this is Chrysala's flavor of the week, as well as my attempt at drawing my pony Amber.

[Z-Byte]

My head pressure is getting stronger. Remarkably so. Instead of being a dull ache, there are times where it is a downright, painful jab in my upper-right and lower-right brain. I'm sure that if I could find out which areas of the brain these are maybe I could determine which parts of my brain are being utilized by my tulpas at that moment. I don't think the area of the head pressure is random at all, so maybe if I know what my tulpas are working on in my subconscious, then that could help with imposing them!

[Z-Byte]

SPECIAL REPORT

 

Chrysala may be considering a different form to work on until I have the time and energy to focus on a completely original dragoness form. This form is a Pokemon named Gardevoir.

 

More on this topic, including our reasoning, at 11.

[Z-Byte]

Okay, screw 11, I've got a break at work and I've got to get the idea out of my brain and into permanency.

 

Earlier, I was putting Chrysala's amulet bag back together and going through some of my old things. I'm very sentimental, so I hold onto a lot of things that trigger distinct memories or otherwise please me in some significant way. And as we were going through one of my ancient, Pokemon-themed gameboy color cases, we looked in its little zipper pouch and found a bunch of my old Pokemon coins, the ones you flip when playing the TCG.

 

And on one of those coins was a Gardevoir.

 

IMMEDIATELY I was bombarded with just how similar I want Chrysala's base personality to match a Gardevoir. That wise, motherly, graceful figure who is highly empathic and, to me at least, very alluring. There are SO MANY dragoness females for me to take reference pictures from, and a long time ago (when Chrysala was just a concept known as my Muse,) I had wrote her as one of them, description and all. But visualizing that form is exceedingly difficult for me right now, mostly due to the stress going down concerning my family matters.

 

But visualizing her as a Gardevoir wouldn't be! Gardevoir are Pokemon that are so psychically linked with their trainer that they feel their emotions as if they were their own. They wield miniature black holes to protect their trainer, and ignore the effects of gravity completely, as they travel by floating. They also utilize the ability to teleport.

 

I'm honestly very excited about this prospect, as I previously had a Gardevoir female character written up named Lilith, based off of a Pokemon I had actually bred in the game. A Gardevoir with Dream Eater and Shadow Sneak, her theme was that she was this kind, protective creature that would hide in her trainer's shadow, communicating with him telepathically, emerging when she is needed or wanted, and while he sleeps she grows these harmless fangs that she uses to bite her trainer and draw his nightmares out of him. I think Chrysala would fit this model well! I would say that Lilith could be a tulpa on her own, but her personality is almost identical to Chrysala's, so it would be a bit redundant.

 

I may do something to help separate her from Lilith, though... perhaps I'll give her the cloud-like wings of an Altaria? Heh, yeah, I'm feeling really excited about this idea. Chrysala can have two forms, Gardevoir at first, and then graduating to her dragoness form if and when we get the time and the drive to commit to it.

[Z-Byte]

Okay, figured I'd post this idea here too. Just read the "Deathmatch" forum topic and I wondered what kind of sparring me and my tulpa would get into. And it boiled down to one thing.

 

Mud wrestling!

 

Okay make that two things. The second being an epic planeswalker duel.

 

We would HAVE to use magic on one another, and I can find of no better arcane competition than Magic: the Gathering. Here's how it would work:

 

Both of us would build a deck, and I would set up the field for both of us, both on the table/floor and in the wonderland as well. As we play lands, we would imagine these lands coming into being in the wonderland, mountains springing up and oceans swirling around us as islands, that sort of thing. Tapping for mana draws those colored orbs to our hands, and whenever we cast a spell, we take the time to impose how it would actually look if we were mages casting this magic. Summon a dragon? The earth shakes and the mountain cracks open to reveal a massive beast. Throwing out a lightning bolt? The sky splits for a second and a bolt of white death zaps down. Every card becomes a visualization exercise for us both!

 

Now you may be wondering about how we can actually play against each other when both of us know what the other's hand is. Well for one, I'm an excellent roleplayer, and that's a trait I'm trying to instill in my tulpa as well. We should all be able to act surprised. And really, we wouldn't care who wins. It's all about the epicness of the fight. If one of us is winning and the fight is relatively boring, we'll just start over or do something else, or better yet, give the other player time to catch up! Mock villainous or heroic gloating until the other person/dragon/pokemon/pony poses a threat! We don't get anything if we win, so the only incentive to play is to have fun playing.

 

Tell me what you guys think of this idea! If I don't get many responses here, I can post it somewhere else! Maybe in the guide section?

 

Let me know!