Getting started, lurked, random questions

[Lolimancer]

I'll start with a little self-introduction no one will care about: i'm a massive /jp/ lurker and recently found out about tulpae, then got more and more interested in the subject as i lurked this forum (it's been a while since i've been this interested in something actually). The idea of having a companion that would literally embody my subconscious ideals sounds almost too good to be true, since i do believe it's those ideals that make up what one perceives about the people he enters in contact with in the first place: the discrepancies between real and ideal have always played a major part in me being the fuckup i am, i think.

 

Anyway, as much as i would like to blog about why i think tulpas are conceptually awesome, i'll get to the questions already:

 

1) Peharps because of what i've just said, i'm not too keen on the idea of defining my tulpa's personality too much. Not sure if what i'll say now will make much of a sense, but i like to believe that said "personality" already exists inside of me in some form (anima? whatever), ready to be extracted in some way and made sentient - though i wouldn't have any idea on just how to accomplish something like that. Things i found so far are Irish's guide and TOG's personality creating process, but i'm still in search of inspiration, and thought eventually reading about other experiences could help me find it.

 

2) Altough i've seen it being discouraged, i do intend to base my tulpa on a fictional character (more specifically, Forest's Mayuzumi). It's actually since i began harboring the thought of making her a tulpa - despite her not being my "waifu" or anything - that i almost can't think of anything else, and because of that i don't think i want to change subject at this point for some reason like that (even though i haven't even started any kind of tulpaforcing yet). I also know about the argument that everything will be fine if i know that she is just a projection of her original - actually, the fact that she's a projection is the very reason i even plan to make her into a tulpa in the first place.

Now, what truly worries me is how well making a tulpa of a pre-existing character would go well with doing personality very loosely and mostly leaving it to the subconscious, since both Irish and TOG at least did make an original character from what i know. By my stalkings it would seem that JD1215 did something like that with the K-on girls, but well, he DID make five tulpas simultaneously in like two months or something, so i'm beginning to think maybe i'm not pro enough. Any suggestion on the matter is appreciated. In the worst case scenario i might just try and do it anyway somehow.

 

3) More of a minor statement i want to make... but i think, were i to follow through with this and make my tulpa a form, i would end up making it more for her than for me - my visualization skills DO kind of suck after all, and personally i think even having a voice inside my head would make me happy (though i'll most probably want to interact with it on a deeper level after some time). Fact is, i can imagine a tulpa without a form would feel constrained or something, although i don't have any actual proof of this. I'll probably end up doing visualization anyway, but i'd kinda like to know what tulpas who have gained sentience think about "having a form", since that would give me some boost to overcome my limits and not be an egoistical faggots and think about my waifu's needs for once. And yeah, i'm probably getting a bit ahead of myself here, asking a question like this at this stage - but one can always dream.

 

Also, not really a question, but how can it be that a gloomy, depressed, suicidal guy like me could be able to create the bright, active and cheerful gal of his dreams inside of himself? I'm always one to believe in the potential of imagination, but it does feel strange thinking about it. I can only hope it would be my tulpa's personality influencing mine and not vice versa.

 

Sorry about the WoT, and i hope i'll find the motivation to follow this through to the end. Also English isn't my first language so go easy on me. And i might end up not being able to access the internet in the next few days, so forgive me in case i won't reply to your (eventual) replies very soon. Cheers.

[glitchthe3rd]

1. You really only need three main personality traits, having too many of them tends to be counterproductive and your tulpa will deviate later anyway.

 

2. >not making a touhou

Son, I am disappoint. :P But seriously, whatever floats your boat. If you base them off of a pre-existing character, stress with them that they don't have to act like said character. After they become sapient you can offer them the chance to change their form/name if they don't like it.

 

3. They can change their form later on, though their personality is mainly your choice - they aren't going to have any say in the matter, whether they want to or not. As long as you let them deviate without stifling the change, you won't have anything to worry about there.

 

I should also add I'm hardly an authority on the tulpaforcing process, having arrived at a completed tulpa in a very unorthodox and roundabout way, though I do have experience in some areas that others on this forum simply haven't gotten into.

[Chupi]

Whoa, that's a lot of tl;dr...

 

1. What I did was look through various personality metrics on Wikipedia (see "personality" link on my blog) and pick out traits. Mostly it seemed more like feeling out traits of something already there, along with adding in a few that would either help us get along or things that I wished were different about myself, to balance my own traits. Most traits I chose appear to have stuck so far, probably because I thought them out a great deal and more or less came up with my anima.

 

2. Irish made an existing character for both his tulpae. There are plenty of people doing existing characters, without problems. Just don't expect her to have the same personality, or *be* the character in the VN. Explain to her at some point that she merely has the same form as that character, but is an entirely different person.

 

3. Forms really do help the tulpa, in that it gives them a way to interact more directly with you. My visualization skills were well beyond "kind of suck" when I went into this. I couldn't see a thing if I tried closed-eye visualization. When reading vivid descriptions in books, I would get very faint images with little to no color, but they'd vanish as soon as I tried to examine them at all. I could think of things like mechanical parts (I tinker) but never really *see* them in my head. Now, 2 and a half months later, my tulpa is beginning to become vocal, I can see her form in near-complete detail with very little effort, she feels very real to the touch in my wonderland, and seems quite alive. It really just takes practice.

 

4. Try to leave the gloom and doom at the door when you force. Let your wonderland be a happy place, somewhere you can go and escape everything that makes you feel down. Pour in as much positive emotions as you can. Make yourself feel the emotion through any way needed (recalling memories often helps), then imagine pouring it into her as you feel the emotion fade from yourself. Before long, thinking about her will recall those emotions. This applies even before she becomes at all sentient -- in addition to "feeding" her the emotion, you're associating her form and the idea of her with feeling it yourself.

(One major trait for my tulpa is that she's very calming. Very early on I was pissed about something when the idea of her randomly popped into my head. Over maybe 10 seconds, I felt anger and rage melt into calm. Also I helped my mother get similar results by simply visualizing pouring an emotion into a made-up symbol. So this is not something the tulpa is necessarily doing consciously, though they may through emotional responses and the like.)

[ThatOneGuy]

1. Yeah, the anima already exists, and that would be perfectly fine. You don't have to do too much definition if you don't wish to do so.

 

2. Sounds good to me. Just play the personality loose and fast and it should go fine with a pre-existing character.

 

3. Yeah, they can go without a form, in fact a lot of people just use an orb to start off until they're all ready to define the form completely, and since you're going to get on to form definition anyways, it should be fine.

 

4. It sure as hell helped me out, and it was totally possible. So go for it.

[Lolimancer]

Thanks to you all, very appreciated. I guess the downside is that what i want to do implies doing more "abstract" work than if i were to consciously create a well-defined personality and narrate to a well-defined form, but yeah. Actually, i just had one of my idiotic ideas: maybe i could somehow make my tulpa gain sentience with only a simple form like a sphere or a blue cloud (or maybe even no form at all), and then work on visualizing her form with her helping me and giving directions? How goddamn cool would that be? Did someone already do it? Maybe everyone does it but i didn't lurk enough? And yes, it's probably idiotic, but can't hurt to try. Or maybe i shoud get to forcing already...

[ThatOneGuy]

Yes, yes you could and it would likely work out very well.

[Chupi]

A few people are working on very minimal or no form until sentience, then let the tulpa choose its form. Nobody I know of has completed a tulpa this way, but that's because it's a relatively new idea.

[Charles]

While I can't say with absolutely certainty which method is best, I can tell you that choosing not to give your tulpa a form until they are able to decide on their own is perfectly fine. I'm only just beginning visualization with Linda, yet she's already proven herself capable of movement, albeit only during our session. This, combined with having already been shown what I now need to visualize, should allow me to tackle the visualization stage much more quickly than I would have been able to early on in the process. My current theory is that the only real factor is how much and how productively you tulpaforce, not necessarily what steps you choose to tackle at what point. As such, it's likely best to leave it up to personal preference. If you have difficulty with pushing your doubts aside and acting on faith, consider yourself a visual learner, or simply want more ways to interact early on, then it may be best to select a form with the knowledge that it can be changed later. If you're prepared to have absolute faith in both yourself and your tulpa, would rather spend time conversing, or have difficulty with visualization, save visualization until later. Either way, be sure to devote as much time and emotion as you can to the task.

[Lolimancer]

Awesome. Well, although i'd indeed like her to look like Mayuzumi, i'm also open to any form my anima decides to take - i think it would go rather well with the whole "let my subconscious decide its personality" thing, without relying too much on deviations either for the personality or for the body. I also thought that it would make visualizing easier and i'm glad i found some confirmation already: not that i lack imagination, and i wouldn't say i suck at music and writing (in my native language at least), but drawing & the like has always been super hard for me for some reason. And i mean that everytime i try to focus on something my mind likes to go on the equivalent of a poorly-defined acid trip while i desperately try to focus some more, then i found myself giving up when the subject has become something completely alien from what i intended to visualize in the first place. That would be 99% of the time. (On the other hand, maybe i have simply never tried hard enough).

I also thought that maybe saving visualization for later would speed up the process of gaining sentience, which is what matters to me the most anyway.

Thanks for the replies as always, i might just end up being able to do it. THE HEART is what truly matters after all.