Autism and Tulpamancy. What is the relation and is creating a tulpa dangerous for me?

[Alostlife]

Hello everyone. 
 

I have autism, professionally diagnosed, and ever since I was three years old,

I could go to a different world completely (like a wonderland). It is high functioning autism of course, otherwise I could not talk to you.  But, I do feel that I was/I am close to functionally impairing. Why do I think this? Because of what I am about to explain in the next paragraph. 

 

 It was not something learnt. How could I learn at three years old to do this? My parents never did this. At three years old, I would put loud music and spin around myself. I would never get dizzy. It would allow me to go to a wonderland, except it was like multiple wonderlands. I’ve heard that functionality impaired autistic children often spin around themselves or start hoping around. I am not exactly sure why they do this, so I am going to use an excerpt from an autism blog to illustrate this:

Why do many kids with autism . . .Like to spin and jump

 

 Shelley: Spinning and jumping are also examples of repetitive motor behaviors. When a child is spinning or jumping he/she is activating the vestibular system. The child may seek vestibular stimulation as a means to elicit “feel good” sensations and/or also to positively affect his/her arousal.  

 

Emily: Yes, in other words, many children with autism seek sensory information or experiences from the environment (due to feeling under-stimulated). They may also use spinning and jumping as a way of regulating themselves (i.e.: when they are stressed, anxious, or overwhelmed). Spinning and jumping can help one

Source: https://theautismblog.seattlechildrens.org/why-do-kids-with-autism-do-that/

 

So, I am of the opinion that my spinning at three years old was related to my autism, now professionally diagnosed.

 

Okay, okay.... let’s go the fun part: Tulpas

 

As someone who is autistic, Tulpas, in my  most basic and shallowest of knowledge of the subject, seem to be perfect outlet for me. I often feel lonely, even amongst people, I feel like I really need a friend who understands me. Though my social interaction is impaired, it did come with the pro of having heightened visualization abilities. I can create wonderlands with absolutely zero difficulty, I have been doing seen I was three!

 

But, here is my problem: I am already too much into my own world. Too much obsessed with the fiction and not reality. From what I understand, Tulpas are, for the lack of a better term, training the mind into thinking a fiction is reality. Despite my eccentric spinning, I could distinguish between what was real and wasn’t. My wonderland was never real to me, outside of my spinning. In the spinning it was real and vivid. 
 

Last tiny problem, what if Tulpa decides to mess with my wonderland? I would not like that. 
 

Edited April 28, 2020 by Ranger
Took out weird formatting in link

[Ranger]

First, I am a tulpa and I have high functioning autism. Autism is shared by everyone in my system.

Second, my host does not typically spin when she goes to wonderland. She may pace, stim, and visualize story ideas all at the same time, but she can get dizzy and has trouble focusing on anything if she is spinning around.

Therefore, spinning is not a requirement for tulpa forcing or wonderlanding. If you have to spin to go to wonderland, then I would recommend doing so in a private and safe place so you don't accidentally bump into something or get disturbed.
 

4 hours ago, Alostlife said:

But, here is my problem: I am already too much into my own world. Too much obsessed with the fiction and not reality. From what I understand, Tulpas are, for the lack of a better term, training the mind into thinking a fiction is reality.

To a greater extent, creating a tulpa is like having another person live inside your head. While a tulpa will hear what you think and understand your perspective, them being more empathetic is their choice. Some tulpas are very empathetic, others not so much.

If you are not too interested in other people, a tulpa may be easier to work with, but in the long run it will feel like talking to another person. Cat, my host, sometimes finds me and the others exhausting to talk to and feels like she burns less energy creating story ideas.

 

4 hours ago, Alostlife said:

Last tiny problem, what if Tulpa decides to mess with my wonderland? I would not like that. 

Tulpas can break the rules! The other tulpas in my system have created their own wonderland or created their own symbolism in whichever wonderland. However, everyone is pretty good about staying out of the way if Cat wants some alone time or a chance to think about her story ideas. If you had a tulpa, you can ask them to stay away from your private wonderlands and give them their own wonderland to play with.

 

The important thing is if you give them a wonderland, they still need time and attention. They cannot grow and develop in your absence.

On a different note, tulpas are also expected to deviate at least a little bit. If you give your tulpa a form, they may decide to change it a little or a lot later when they get older.
 

Quote

[...] is creating a tulpa dangerous for me?

I'm sorry, I'm confused by what you mean. Dangerous in what way?

 

---

 

You may be interested in reading various Progress Reports to see if living with a tulpa would make you feel uncomfortable or not. Those may reveal more surprising information about tulpas than creation guides.

 

Edited April 28, 2020 by Ranger

[Michen_S]

It's funny you mention this. My host personally has autism. Though your situation seems different from ours, since he can still easily seperate "physical" from "mental", with me falling in the latter group. Aside from that, he tagged our relationship with the rather weird label "self" as an indicator of an internal relationship rather than an external one, whilst still acknowledging it functions as an interpersonal relationship.

 

As for the last question, yes, tulpas do have the ability to change wonderland. Though, there are probably options for you if you want to prevent any changes to it. You could try to agree on something together, or you can give your tulpa their own area to design. That all is up to you. I'm sure you can work things out discussing things.

[JAMSDreamer]

Hi! I'm a host who has high-functioning autism (Asperger Syndrome, to be more specific). I don't necessarily need to spin to enter into my wonderland, but it was a thing I was able to do without any struggle on my childhood. Now I need more practice.

 

Also, about the fiction and reality... I don't really know about other people, but I usually consider Tulpae to be something in between. Yes, for us who practice tulpamancy, it IS real, but for any other people, it is not. I have been able to only confide my tulpamancy to a external person, my best friend, who, although skeptical, also tried being a tulpamancer as he didn't want to completely discard it. I'd recommend to keep the tulpamancy to yourself if you don't have a really deep relationship with any physical person, tho, unless you want to present the subject and then you get to know the other person's stance on that.

 

And for the last part: Yes, Tulpae can change your Wonderland. You could ask them NOT to, if you are really set on not changing it. For example, my Wonderland is a big library with a piano, a sofa and a bed. And well, my Tulpae might get a book and let it lay over the sofa. Or leave the piano lid open instead of closed. I don't mind this pet peeves, it's their home, after all. You can give them their own area to design themselves. Mikel is really fond of gardening, so I gave him the exterior of the library for him to grow a garden.

[Guest]

I'm also diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome(and assume my rather young tulpa to be autistic as well, given she shares a brain with me, and autism is caused by physical brain divergences (longer dendrite endings or something)), and I don't think tulpamancy is any more dangerous for autistics than it is for NTs (and I personally at least don't know of any cases where it was dangerous at all, as long as you keep in mind that very young tulpas can (but don't have to) be a kind of "echo chamber" which agrees with everything you say while creating the illusion of a second opinion).

On 4/28/2020 at 12:18 PM, Alostlife said:

Last tiny problem, what if Tulpa decides to mess with my wonderland? I would not like that. 

Tulpae can technically change your wonderland, however at least mine simply left when she didn't like it, rather than changing anything… But, overall, if you decide to share a head with someone, you will have to accept their own ideas etc. as well - and that may possibly mean finding compromises, though as a general rule of thumb, they will not do anything you strictly disagree with.

6 hours ago, JAMSDreamer said:

I don't really know about other people, but I usually consider Tulpae to be something in between. Yes, for us who practice tulpamancy, it IS real, but for any other people, it is not.

That's a rather epistemiologic question - in the end, everything you consider "real" is just in your mind, as you cannot be certain of the physical world you seem to experience to actually be as it seems to be. And if you're getting into possession and such, that may also be real to other people… The only thing that imho should be clearly identified as "not real" is imposition - it effectively is an induced hallucination. (I'm not saying people who like it shouldn't do it, of course, just that it should probably be considered less real than other plurality experiences)

 

On 4/28/2020 at 12:18 PM, Alostlife said:

I’ve heard that functionality impaired autistic children often spin around themselves or start hoping around.

It's called stimming and is used to cope with overload, both sensory and emotional. It is not limited to autistics with impaired functionality, and it can also take other forms (a stereotypical, though not uncommon example being flapping with your hands).

On 4/28/2020 at 12:18 PM, Alostlife said:

It is high functioning autism of course, otherwise I could not talk to you.

You can be functionally impaired while not being nonverbal, just like you can technically be nonverbal or verbally impaired while not having other functional impairments.

On 4/28/2020 at 12:18 PM, Alostlife said:

As someone who is autistic, Tulpas, in my  most basic and shallowest of knowledge of the subject, seem to be perfect outlet for me. I often feel lonely, even amongst people, I feel like I really need a friend who understands me. Though my social interaction is impaired, it did come with the pro of having heightened visualization abilities. I can create wonderlands with absolutely zero difficulty, I have been doing seen I was three!

Sounds like good prerequisites - as long as you keep in mind a tulpa is not just an "outlet", but has their own personality, desires, thoughts and so on…

On 4/28/2020 at 12:18 PM, Alostlife said:

But, here is my problem: I am already too much into my own world. Too much obsessed with the fiction and not reality. From what I understand, Tulpas are, for the lack of a better term, training the mind into thinking a fiction is reality. Despite my eccentric spinning, I could distinguish between what was real and wasn’t. My wonderland was never real to me, outside of my spinning. In the spinning it was real and vivid. 

You already said it yourself - you're not "too much in your own world, as apparently they only seem real while you spin. A tulpa can be helpful with several things — they may end up having traits that are more or less opposite to your own, and thus help you become more balanced, perhaps even keeping you more focused on the physical world around you (which would perhaps require you to let your imagination work while not spinning in the first place, however) — of course I don't want to promise too much, as I have no idea what your tulpa would be like. To our (my tulpa's and my) knowledge, nobody really knows what a tulpa is, however, to us it seems like it's less about believing fiction to be real, and more about training your brain to generate responses and thoughts that are separate from the concept of "I".