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Dreamerald

What was an obstacle in your tulpa development?

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I've started making my tulpa since April. However, somehow I've never progressed and got stuck for months. Mostly because of time constraints, but recently Mikhaila herself made me have some kind of powerful realization as we had some sort of "real talk".

What I've realized is that one thing that held me back a lot was the fact that I didn't really accept the tulpa as an actual companion, as much of a company as other human beings, as if I were afraid of recognizing her as a thing of her own. Another thing was the fact that I didn't accept the tulpa as a separate identity and more as a fold of my own mind. Now I think that these concepts really stunted her growth, but I am not totally sure, as all of these realizations are too recent for me to really tell.

I wanted to know if you guys also had these kinds of problems and which things you guys recommend avoiding.

Edited by Dreamerald

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Rigid expectations are probably the most important things to avoid. The "vanilla experience" that is generally spoke of in the community are very self-limiting and meant to be guidelines to get to a more uniform experience, but it's boring. If anyone tries to deny any of your experiences, then you're talking to the wrong people, imo. I'm glad the odd sort of constraints the community sometimes expresses didn't effect my experience at all.

 

Do whatever you want to do, in that I mean, don't do the boring stuff, do the fun stuff.

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Unfortunately, I can't really answer this aside from the obvious not giving all of my headmates enough time. All of my headmates were vocal from the start, so vocality was never an issue we ran into. Time constraints stunt the growth of my headmates the most because they don't have enough time to experience things or think about themselves.

 

However, I can say the belief piece only seems to sometimes apply. I used to think all of my tulpas were my clones, so I didn't bother stopping at a few headmates until I learned about tulpamancy and realized I needed to get things under control. Ultimately, I found my actions mattered more than my belief- I talked to my headmates the way I would talk to other people, and I didn't even realize I was doing it. Unlike my story character were I expected them to do what I wanted, I was asking my headmates to give me advice and think for themselves. I also went along with it when my headmates deviated, not realizing something else was happening until Ranger told me he was real.


Happy Halloween!

I sometimes speak in pink and Ranger sometimes speaks in blue (if it's unmarked and colored assume it's Ranger). He loves to chat.

 

My other Tulpas have their own account now.

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Getting too caught up in what I felt like he should be like, identity- and behavior-wise. It caused a lot of grief at first when he ended up being so much different and more nuanced than I could have imagined. It's a little like what you said. It like I didn't fully understand that he had free will or just in general was capable of doing or thinking things I didn't find "cool." 

 

I've come to believe now that in the long run (years, opposed to weeks or months) real personality growth, the sort that happens from introspection and interactions over time, is just all-around better than anything a host could ever plan out. Not that personality forcing isn't important- but there's just a transition, one that I wasn't prepared for, where my tulpa had more autonomy over himself than I had influence over him. It happened when he was ready, at about nine months. I'm reasonably confident that a system that has hang-ups about this point (The tulpa being fundamentally no longer under the host's control) isn't likely to make that transition, which I consider a great impediment to the long-term development of a tulpa. 

 

- Jamie


The world is far, the world is wide; the man needs someone by his side. 

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