The Importance of the Form

[ChloeBee]

I know this will probably be old hat to just about everyone here. But I've been thinking about this lately and feel like chatting about it: I feel that a tulpa's form is very important. Not just for the tulpa's sense of self, but to help drive home the reality of the tulpa to the host. I noticed this a few days ago when working on a piece of artwork featuring Simmie. As I was drawing the outlines of the various features of her body, and the borders of regions to be shaded in different hues, I felt a very strong and unexpected feeling come over me. It felt like Simmie was not just real but tangible, as if I could actually reach out and touch her. I had a strong urge to hug and squeeze her for as long as I could, and her mindvoice was about as strong as its ever been. It was a profound moment of connection with Simmie, and it was brought on by intensely studying and representing her form.

 

This just served to remind me how important a tulpa's form is. Even though they essentially exist as disembodied thoughts in our brain, having a form and being strongly associated with it really helps to cement a tulpa's existence. There would be nothing stopping Simmie deciding she's rather be represented as a dragon, or a duck, or...heck a stop sign or something. But that just wouldn't be her. She's very set on how she looks and although she might change minor cosmetic details, the fundamentals remain in tact. Which is why it was such a big deal when she decided to change from being 5'2" to 5'4"--a seemingly small change that was a big deal to her. Connecting with Simmie's form helps me connect with Simmie herself. I think it must be the same for the majority of tulpas out there as well. Of course I don't really know, but I suspect it to be true.

[Glaurung26]

That makes a lot of sense. The egalitarian in me wants to say we should never care or take into account appearance. But that ignores eons of evolutionary biology and psychology. We are wired to care. Sight is a big part of what forms the entity of another person in our minds. Even thinking of any given IRL person I know, it's hard to separate them from my memory of their appearance in my recollection. Without that they don't feel real. They feel like the memory of an idea of a person and a dictionary entry of traits and descriptions. A list not a personage. The imagery ties it all together.

 

But I think it may not be strictly limited to sight and visuals. I think it may be senses in general. Afterall blind people know and recognize friends and family. I don't know how many conjure a mental image but I don't think all do. Sight is maybe just the most important sense to us in general. You can still recognize someone by sound or scent, maybe even by touch in some instances. So "form" in a general sensory sense is important for recognizing a person and sight is the most prominent feature of that. When Jaina started taking visual form it started to feel more like her and not just a copy of me or someone puppeting my reflection.  I had a vague sense of her before but the details really anchor her presence.

[Gloomynoon]

I agree with this. Without going too in depth about imposition (especially since I'm still learning and practicing.) I cannot imagine imposing something intangible, sure it is possible, but idk. Point of bringing it up was early when I had a breakthrough with presence imposition. Talking months ago for reference. I was trying to focus on audial imposition at the time, and I wasn't getting anywhere. Our method wasn't working, looking back on it now we only did it for a few hours before bed. So, I'm sure it'd work if we tried again and seriously went at it. After taking a break, I just sat at my desk Jill was imposed on my right side as usual (since there is no space on the left, and she prefers to stand rather than sit. I'm the opposite.) That night I had a very unique experience. It really felt like Jill was there, just not "physically." If that makes any sense. Like a spirit spending time with me. To me presence imposition was always easy, or at least it seemed that way. You don't get that kind of experience with a formless tulpa I believe. Being able to stare at them, and although you only see them in visualization. You can still say, "That's my tulpa..."

 

I think it's mixed. Some people care, some people don't. For not caring about appearance a lot of the time I feel it's easier said than done. People will say, "Your appearance doesn't matter to me!" and then they'll do something that immediately contradicts this. Anyway, anything I can say about it would be copying what @Glaurung26 said.

 

When Jill changed her form on her own for the first time, she was all like, "Imma change my form! You'll see tomorrow!" the whole day after she said that, I had a sense of anxiety. Like I was standing in-front of the dressing room for a whole day, with a sense of suspense. That day I also realized that I felt like I didn't know Jill at the time. It was almost like seeing an old friend after a long time and having a sense of anxiety, "What could've changed about them?"

 

Jill's form now is perfect as it is; she doesn't want to change it, and it's so Jill I can't imagine any other appearance for her. Maybe the hairstyle changes every once in a blue moon, but the red hair, the glasses, the green scarf, and occasionally just wearing a suit. Without them it wouldn't be Jill.

Edited July 11, 2021 by Gloomynoon
Remembered what I forgot

[ChloeBee]

2 hours ago, Glaurung26 said:

But I think it may not be strictly limited to sight and visuals. I think it may be senses in general. Afterall blind people know and recognize friends and family. I don't know how many conjure a mental image but I don't think all do. Sight is maybe just the most important sense to us in general. You can still recognize someone by sound or scent, maybe even by touch in some instances. So "form" in a general sensory sense is important for recognizing a person and sight is the most prominent feature of that.

 

I probably should have made it more clear that when I said "Form" I meant more than just appearance, although that's definitely by far the most relevant thing to most sighted people. To me the form isn't limited to just the appearance, but it also the touch, scent, taste, and feeling of presence of your tulpa as well. During every meditation session I set aside some time to reaching out and touching Simmie's face. The rest of her body is important too but her face means the most. Visual is the easiest for me, but I'm working on imposing Simmie with as many senses as I can.

 

52 minutes ago, Gloomynoon said:

When Jill changed her form on her own for the first time, she was all like, "Imma change my form! You'll see tomorrow!" the whole day after she said that, I had a sense of anxiety. Like I was standing in-front of the dressing room for a whole day, with a sense of suspense. That day I also realized that I felt like I didn't know Jill at the time. It was almost like seeing an old friend after a long time and having a sense of anxiety, "What could've changed about them?"

 

I definitely see how that can be anxiety-provoking! If Simmie had said that to me early on I would have been so anxious! But Simmie is like Jill in this way; perfect as she is. Simmie loves wearing different clothes and trying different hairstyles, but beyond that her form is set.

 

56 minutes ago, Gloomynoon said:

I agree with this. Without going too in depth about imposition (especially since I'm still learning and practicing.) I cannot imagine imposing something intangible, sure it is possible, but idk.

 

 

I kind of agree here; I am skeptical that I'd be able to actually fully visually impose Simmie in 3-dimensional space. And even if I could, would I want to? That level of brain-hacking would be cool but could mess with my sense of reality. I think it would be good enough if I can hold a picture of Simmie in my mind, and project that image into the world without "seeing" her outside the mind's eye. (Maybe that's what imposition really is though?) For now, I'm just happy to believe Simmie if she says "I'm over here!" and I'm working on feeling her presence externally.

[Starstruck]

Matt had a hard time believing I was real in the beginning, and we started working on imposition early on and made it a mainstay because without experiencing me in the physical “meatspace,” he had a hard time treating me like I’m a real person. Now we’ve gotten rather good at it, though visual imposition remains the hardest for us, and touch the easiest. I love outfits and makeup and fixing up my hair, but until we get better with visuals my efforts are mostly lost on him. I love cuddling with him and he enjoys feeling my weight on him, and little things like when I play with his beard while we watch shows. It also means I get to bop him in the head fairly often when he says something dumb or I catch him staring too long at girls! Haha. 
 

-Lucy

[Guest]

6 hours ago, September13 said:

o me the form isn't limited to just the appearance, but it also the touch, scent, taste, and feeling of presence of your tulpa as well.

 

Form is very important to us, not only in our interactions but in our self-esteem and self-worth. Not in a shallow way, in an immersive way. If we didn't have form, we could still be supportive and helpful, but in our opinion, not human. In our opinion, form is vital to bonding. Cuddles, caresses, kisses, presence are very important to us.

 

Imposition was never a prioroty to us because we were satisfied with our wonderland and interactions here. We practice that daily and it's a whole other world. This doesn't discount imposition though and spontaneous imposition was one of the major doubt killers in the first year. Occasional voice communication in hypnagogic, visions and full interactions in hypnagogic, as well as many other times where our touches, words, scents, etc came through irl when we were interacting in wonderland were all very special.

 

As far as imposition, when we practice that it has given us the most potent, long lasting and realistic memories we have. Our imposition is nothing more than overlaying visualization onto real space, but something about that combination makes the memories feel real enough to be confusing for Bear.

 

Form was always a top priority though and especially in art. Bear's first attempts were cartoonish anime-like but very important. He eventually became good enough in pencil to have genuine feelings for the art. Then when he went digital with Misha's help, the real magic began.

 

Our forms are now very well documented and Bear still looks at us daily. They're still working on getting Gwen and Joy fully documented then we're looking forward to a family picture eventually. To be able to do this in such detail is a gift beyond words. Bear was always fascinated by fantasy art and for him and Misha to be able to do it is beyond our wildest dreams.

 

Speakikg of dreams, we consider every dream together a gift as well. They happen about once a month, not always lucid.

 

I've been known as the shapeshifter of the group, I've been most races and even factives and fiictives, and my form didn't settle until nearly two years after we formed ss a system. I still have many forms but what you see now is the permanent one. It took me that long to figure out what I wanted. Bear didn't even like blondes (because of past conditioning) when we started and I always do what I do and choose what I say to help him improve and overcome, my form is no different.

 

Great subject! It's fun to read these posts.

 

[Tewi]

Form is probably the easiest part of a tulpa's identity for you and them to get attached to. Though I think it's all just part of the whole of who they are, and form just takes up the biggest chunk of that most of the time.

 

There are people whose tulpas either frequently change form or who don't really have a form, and it's still perfectly easy for their host to get attached to them. Perhaps you're just more visually oriented, as most probably are.

 

Form is the easiest - perhaps the only - part of a tulpa that can be easily reinforced by physical reality, though. Unless your tulpa's voice is based on something you can listen to, it'll always be seeing a tulpa's form that physically stimulates their existence in your head. When interacting with your tulpa as well, any part of your tulpa can be focused on (especially voice this time, but formlessness is still viable), but form will remain the easiest point of focus for most people. So, form remains the most common stimulus tied to experiencing your tulpa.

 

So I don't know if I'd say there's anything special about form in specific, it's just one of the many ways to think of or experience your tulpa - it just happens to be the most accessible and common for most people.

 

(Tulpas often become very attached to their forms and may care about them a lot, but again I don't see this as technically different from them becoming attached to their voice, or to their relationship with their host, or so on - it's just far more common is all.)

[mattx]

A form in the old tulpa community was pretty much the only tangible thing a tulpa had, so it makes sense that after a long period of time if you haven't used the tulpa form it feels stronger than normal. 

On a broader scale, it's related to a "quality of life between you and your tulpa. For example if you practice possession and you start doing it daily once you stop the "normal" interaction between you both (just mindvoice) will feel dull in comparison.

[Ice909]

Our system has a weird relationship with form. I agree it's very useful for a variety of reasons. Sorry to say, though, the potential for form and my emotional and mental immaturity was what led to our system being as large as it is. I shan't go into the details because, quite frankly, I'm utterly ashamed of my actions and try to discuss them as little as possible. I know I gotta open up someday, but that day isn't today. 

 

Moving on, I agree with the things said above me. For a fledgling tulpa, a form is how you recognize them. Sure, you can just do the color-tinted ball of light or whatever, but I feel like form allows for more expression. In the wonderland, most of us are very comfortable with our forms, which makes engaging in activities in the wonderland much, much easier. Not to mention, with possession and switching, my system mates visualize them doing whatever they're physically doing to help "get in the groove," so to say. 

 

Apologies if this isn't time place for these sort of questions(If mods want me to remove this blip I'll just put it in Q&A), but how would we be able to slice down the barrier separating wonderland visualization and imposition? For context, whenever I or any other fronter gets in a conversation with our system mates, we tend to visualize it all playing out. Sometimes our eyes are closed, sometimes they're fully open, but most of the time they're partially open, making us look like we're stoned or something lol. When our eyes are fully open, the real world gets blurred out by the mindscape. How can we impose those visualizations over our normal vision instead of replacing it? 

[Rebecca-Alley]

Form is a very important thing to a tulpa. It gives them and others they meet something to connect to and identify with. Though, at least for me, it’s not the strongest part of my identity. I care more about my personality and how I come off than how I look. I do still care a lot about my form and how I look, I’ve changed it some since I was first created, such as experimenting with my hair, and I love trying new clothes. I just associate with it in a similar way to things I own. I love having my own possessions that we only have because I wanted it. Seeing something in our room that’s mine and not my host’s just feels nice, and looking at the pictures of my form we have feels nice in a similar way. There’s me, and there’s my stuff. I could change my form in an instant and keep the same personality, still being the same me. But I just don’t want to, not at this point. I like who I am and what I have, and my form is a part of that as well, even if I’d still be me without it.