Tief's tulpa

[TurboSimmie]

Yeah tulpamancy does seem like an insane thing when you first bring it up. But you can tell your partner that it's a practice that has legitimately helped many people, and that it's impossible to "give yourself" schizophrenia or DID from tulpamancy.

[SebastianSimp]

25.09.2021

 

I figured there's always more development at the start, and it's good to describe my experiences for the next generation of newbies, so forgive me if I'm posting a lot.

 

My first active forcing session. I should've used a timer, but I think I managed to do 10-15 minutes of forcing. Which is amazing, considering how bad I am at focusing. Had to close my eyes to get into the zone, but I'll probably be good with open eyes next time.

 

It was a bit strange, I didn't really know what to do, but I plopped the two of us onto my Wonderland Couch and started talking. The important parts of the conversation were like this:
 

"So I'm your host, [my real name], and you're a tulpa..."
"I know. No need [to explain]."

"Do you like your current form? You can change it later if you want, it's a placeholder."
"It's alright."

At some point I imagined a table in front of the couch and asked Sebastian to pour us some tea. 8 teacups appeared on the table.

"...why are there 8 cups when there's only two of us? I don't plan on making this many tulpas, you know."
(parroting?) "...The more tea, the better."

 

I noticed I'm particularly thorough when it comes to imagining Sebastian's gloves, so I took his hands in mine and tried to imagine the texture.
(parroting?) "(chuckle) Are you fascinated with these gloves?.."

 

There were more responses, but they were either unnatural (as in, I had to think for a few seconds to "come up" with an answer from Seb, which is definitely parroting) or I couldn't translate them into coherent thoughts. I definitely had more luck with visualization, but I think it's a given; I draw a lot. Some of Seb's mannerisms include quietly laughing after hearing praise or sincere words, and leaning onto one side of the couch, propping up his chin with his fist.

 

There's also this drawing I made yesterday while I was at work. I tried to make Seb's ears pointy like in the drawing while we were in the Wonderland, and he didn't mind.

[SebastianSimp]

21 hours ago, TurboSimmie said:

Yeah tulpamancy does seem like an insane thing when you first bring it up. But you can tell your partner that it's a practice that has legitimately helped many people, and that it's impossible to "give yourself" schizophrenia or DID from tulpamancy.

At this point they've already read some articles, I suppose they know better now, and they seem supportive. Thank you for the support <3

[Glaurung26]

That's what progress reports are for, post away lol. I don't do too much focused "tulpamancy" with my tulpa anymore. 😄 

Our PR has devolved into couples therapy 😆

 

So we mostly just have slice of life stuff, occasional art, screenshots or non-tulpa related host stuff like job status or whatever. I'm old and boring now I guess. So I just read what other folks do.

[SebastianSimp]

On 9/25/2021 at 7:48 PM, Glaurung26 said:

That's what progress reports are for, post away lol. I don't do too much focused "tulpamancy" with my tulpa anymore. 😄 

Our PR has devolved into couples therapy 😆

 

So we mostly just have slice of life stuff, occasional art, screenshots or non-tulpa related host stuff like job status or whatever. I'm old and boring now I guess. So I just read what other folks do.

"Old and boring" put a smile on my face. :) 

But yeah, I mean, what else is there to do when you've achieved what you wanted (in this branch of life)? :D

[SebastianSimp]

27.09.2021

 

Two or three days ago, I put two (accidental) triggers-reminders to force Sebastian: one is the smell of soap I have at home ("hey, Sebastian, do you like the smell? ...I'm going to associate this soap with him now, aren't I."), and the other one is a fountain I pass on the way from work to home ("cute fountain, I'll take a picture for you. Oh, it's going to be soap again...").

 

They do work, especially the second one. But today was a bit different.

 

I walked home from work, approached the fountain, and... It was not working, no water was flowing. Now, in my head I was a little bit surprised. Were I not raising a tulpa, I'd most likely feel nothing else. But after the realization and surprise there was a different feeling, like, somewhat blank? With a tinge of sadness. I imagine it as a wave of white sea water gently hitting the left side of the body. I assumed it might be Sebastian's feelings, so I tried my best to reassure him that the fountain won't stay like that forever.

 

It's getting progressively easier to remember to narrate to Sebastian. Or rather, it's getting harder not to talk to him, haha. Today I couldn't "exit" speaking to him for a couple of minutes. Maybe we were compensating for the fact that I couldn't feel like I'm talking to him all morning.

 

I'm gonna try to get him to say "good morning, [name]" and "sweet dreams, [name]" back for now. 

[OrdoVsInfo]

That's great! I hope seb's fountain is back in service soon! 😊

[SebastianSimp]

19 hours ago, OrdoVsInfo said:

That's great! I hope seb's fountain is back in service soon! 😊

You damn right it's his fountain!! It should be fixed today or else they're gonna have a grumpy host in their office!

[Luja]

 I really like your progress reports here and seeing how you're developing Sebastian!

It's a great idea to assign certain objects or places, like the fountain, to him so they remind you of him. And poor Sebastian when he noticed that the fountain wasn't working! I hope he can get to enjoy it again soon! 😊

 

I also love the drawing you made of him! It must be fun to draw your tulpa, I need to try that out, too!

Edited September 29, 2021 by Luja

[SebastianSimp]

13 hours ago, Luja said:

 I really like your progress reports here and seeing how you're developing Sebastian!

It's a great idea to assign certain objects or places, like the fountain, to him so they remind you of him. And poor Sebastian when he noticed that the fountain wasn't working! I hope he can get to enjoy it again soon! 😊

 

I also love the drawing you made of him! It must be fun to draw your tulpa, I need to try that out, too!

Thank you!

Do try drawing your tulpa, I keep the drawing near my PC and sometimes look at it. It was not only fun to draw, but it's become another great way to get reminded about Seb.