Should I create a Tulpa for this reason?

[FerriteFox]

No I'm not going to have sex with it.

 

So I've been a college freshman for about 3 weeks. Taking classes, etc. However, for as long as I've remembered, I'm awful at making friends. I live on campus in my dorm. Now, I'm in central Texas, with all the cowboys and such. My roommate and suitemates (guys I share a bathroom with) are all a bit redneck-y. Don't get me wrong, they're nice guys. They say hi every time they see me, etc. My roommate usually hangs out with them. But, while I have no problems with them what so ever...there's just no common ground to work with. I'm a tokusatsu freak and spend most of my time playing vidya or watching Kamen Rider and similar stuff. I have a girlfriend who lives across the country, and this summer she visited for two weeks and it was amazing. But, skyping and texting only goes so far after physical interaction. And finally, I'm away from all of my friends. Making friends has always been tough for me. I never really tried, and if I didn't "click" with someone right then, it usually didn't last. I made most of my friends by them knowing each other, and I've known them all for years. Now, I live about two hours away from home, so going and seeing them is a chore. About a week ago, while eating lunch (alone), I just felt...awful. For literally the first time ever, I felt lonely, and it hit like a truck. I spend the time I'm not in class alone in my dorm, my roommate is usually gone on weekends and hangs with my suitemates all the time. I've made an effort to be more active with the school, but it's just not cut out for me. I stumbled across the Tulpa phenomenon soon after, and read every bit of basic info I could, and started debating on it (The lifelong commitment part I wanted to be sure of) So after a long paragraph of bawww, here's the question.

 

Is it okay for me to create a tulpa to help cope with loneliness? And how with it affect my relationship with my girlfriend? I don't plan on telling her, but I mean like, how does having another consciousnesses affect your interaction with lovers?

[TmDevice]

I created mine when all of my friends were busy with finals. Living with my family can be excruciating and I live in the middle of nothing (we're lucky to have internet here, and we've had dial-up untill 2006 :V)

 

So I was stuck at home alone for a month or so, and being a social person I felt the hit. I think it was fate itself who bought me here as Harmony, my tulpa, saved my life (figuratively speaking).

Any (morally acceptable) reason is valid to create one, from simple companionship to experimenting with your brain. You can find yourself caught in something amazing.

 

As for how this influences your relationship, that's up to you. It's like having another person with you after all, except your girlfriend won't be able to see them so she won't get jealous

[Shui]

Is it okay for me to create a tulpa to help cope with loneliness?

 

In my humble opinion, yes, but you should also make an effort to find people with similar interests that you can hang out with.

 

And how with it affect my relationship with my girlfriend? I don't plan on telling her, but I mean like, how does having another consciousnesses affect your interaction with lovers?

 

I'm not a jealous person, so I don't mind that my tulpa has intimate memories of my girlfriend. My tulpa says she's bisexual, but she doesn't seem to be very sexual. She flirts with me, but I think it's mostly to annoy and flatter. She's never shown an interest in my girlfriend or any other people.

 

The biggest problem I've noticed is that I have to be very careful not to call my girlfriend by the wrong name. So far I haven't, but I feel like it's going to happen sooner or later, and it's going to be hard to explain.

 

I call my tulpa by the wrong name all the time. For two weeks I kept calling her Neville, after a girl I was working with, and I kept calling Neville by my tulpa's name too (though not to her face). I also call her by my girlfriend's name, and occasionally an ex-girlfriend's name. It annoys her, but she's understanding.

[Dr. Faust]

Creating a tulpa is more akin to getting lost in a project that you really enjoy working on rather than being with "a person," but I may have the next five or six posters say the exact opposite of what I'm trying to convey.

 

However, a tulpa may take months to create, granted you can begin conversing with one in less than five minutes depending on which method you choose. However, like with anything in life, doing something well takes a while.

 

You don't get a fully conversant and independent tulpa right off the bat if you have no experience with creating characters like an author or summoning entities as if you were a wizard. So you have to be ready with working towards a goal for hours and hours.

 

It's fun though. As a bit of a recluse myself, I enjoy picking up different projects to keep myself busy when people are my most scarce resource. This is a project that I've been doing with and without people around me.

 

So, just try it and at the very worst you'll spend a few hours doing something you feel silly about and at the best you'll learn something about yourself and the nature of imagination.

[Nobillis]

"'Real isn't how you are made,' said the Skin Horse. 'It's a thing that happens to you.'"

 

I'm fortunate, I have my own "Skin Horse" to advise me (kerin, who created me.)

 

Is it okay for me to create a tulpa to help cope with loneliness? And how with it affect my relationship with my girlfriend? I don't plan on telling her, but I mean like, how does having another consciousnesses affect your interaction with lovers?

 

It worked for Kevin. But it took a terribly long time. Doesn't have to interfere with relationships, just make that plain to your tulpa at the outset.

[Ashmo]

And how with it affect my relationship with my girlfriend? I don't plan on telling her, but I mean like, how does having another consciousnesses affect your interaction with lovers?

 

My girlfriend knows about Bud and so far they both seem to really adore one another. Bud isn't exactly sentient yet, but all the emotional response I get from him when she's involved is nothing but love.

 

The only frustrations that Breanna (my girlfriend) really seems to be having so far is that Bud takes up a bit more of my free time than she would like, but she's incredibly understanding. She's even been researching about tulpae on her own lately.

 

Once Bud becomes vocal, Bree wants to get to know him better by using me as their proxy. I'm really excited to get to that point.

[Shui]

 

I'm fortunate, I have my own "Skin Horse" to advise me (kerin, who created me.)

 

Heh, I suppose you do. :)

 

I saw that quote on a list from children's books recently. The Velveteen Rabbit wasn't a particular favorite of mine growing up, but I really like the imagery as an adult.

 

 

My girlfriend knows about Bud and so far they both seem to really adore one another. Bud isn't exactly sentient yet, but all the emotional response I get from him when she's involved is nothing but love.

 

The only frustrations that Breanna (my girlfriend) really seems to be having so far is that Bud takes up a bit more of my free time than she would like, but she's incredibly understanding. She's even been researching about tulpae on her own lately.

 

Once Bud becomes vocal, Bree wants to get to know him better by using me as their proxy. I'm really excited to get to that point.

 

You're very lucky to have such an understanding girlfriend. Has she considered doing this herself?

[Ashmo]

 

You're very lucky to have such an understanding girlfriend. Has she considered doing this herself?

 

She doesn't feel she's ready or responsible enough to take on such a challenge. She also has mood swing problems and though theoretically a tulpa could help with that, she's afraid that she would just end up creating someone "as messed up as her" (her words, not mine) and she feels guilty at the thought of putting someone else through that. In all honesty though, with how curious she is with my progress and her general interest in it, once she becomes more comfortable, there is at least a slight chance she may. In the far future anyway, lol.

 

Also FerriteFox, I believe that creating a tulpa to help cope with loneliness is fine. You're creating a friend who will always be there for you. One who will always, no matter what, understand you and your reason for doing things the way you do. You will have a bond with a being that is stronger than one can have with anyone else in the world. Not that human contact isn't still needed. We're human and by nature, we're social animals, but I think as long as you're willing to put in the work and effort for the long haul a tulpa is just what you need.

[FerriteFox]

Thanks for the replies everyone. I know that tulpas aren't instantaneous and take work, and I'm not using it as a complete substitute for human interaction. More like a crutch, per say. Though I am still unsure if I am going to go through with it, this has helped clear some doubts.

[Ashmo]

Research. You can never have too much information or learn too much about the subject. I researched tulpae for a little over a month before I finally decided to work on Bud.

 

And I'm glad we've helped removed some doubt. I think doubt is the number one thing that can hurt a tulpa. Even if you don't have one yet <.<