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Guest Anonymous

Yuki

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Guest Anonymous

I guess I could use a backup of my personal notes, might as well put them up here with some additional comments.

 

I'm making a kawaii genki 2d loli imouto tulpa called Yuki.

 

day 1

I started out making a list of personality traits. I went over each of them and considered how I wanted them to manifest in Yuki. Visualisation came easy to me, so I created a basic wonderland to force in, a small room with a table in the middle. I imagined Yuki to be a small ball of whatever on that table, and started narrating to her, discussing all the above traits.

 

Later that day I decided on the form I'd like to give her, and started to try and visualize her as that form. I parroted with her a little with a voice I'd like her to have. I tried training my visualization skills through drawing in my wonderland and playing tic tac toe.

 

day 2

I felt some strange pressures in my forehead, incidentally in the same place I mentally imagined to be where Yuki is relative to 'me.'

 

day 3

I've expanded my wonderland. On the bottom of the image there's a small house. The middle room is the original room I started with. To the right there's a symbolic library, the concept of which I took from a guide, containing all of my memories, so Yuki can learn about the world and me herself. The bottom room is something I came up with myself. I wasn't sure if Yuki was able to see through my eyes, so created a room where one wall shows what I see. The left room was an experiment, where I told Yuki that there was an empty room behind the door, which she would be free to fill with whatever she wants. The experiment failed, and the room was empty when I went in a while later, so I put in a bed and some other stuff myself. We'll get back to that in a later stage.

 

To the north of the house there's a pond, a training field (A high fantasy D&D-esque world is the goal!), and a forest to be explored when we feel like it.

 

day 4

The physical sensations are becoming more and more pronounced. I'm getting tons of pressures in my forehead, sometimes almost headaches, and the same but weaker at the base of my skull. Here's a shitty drawing detailing the locations.

 

At this point I'm narrating a lot as well as focusing on visualisation a lot during active forcing. I also do passive forcing whenever I think of her.

 

day 11

I heard Yuki calling out to me in my mindvoice. I heard her say my name, then felt a strong pressure in my forehead. I'm excited!

 

day 13

This morning I wasn't even passively forcing, but as I walked downstairs I heard some kind of static noise, and a voice behind me saying "hi". It was a full auditory illusion, kinda startled me. But then I realized this was exactly the voice I want Yuki to have, and that this seems to a huge step!

 

I couldn't actively reproduce the auditory imposition during active forcing, but I can be patient for a little while longer. We've made huge progress so far, so I'm happy enough.

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I guess I could use a backup of my personal notes, might as well put them up here with some additional comments.

 

I'm making a kawaii genki 2d loli imouto tulpa called Yuki.

 

This is gonna be a good one.

 

Later that day I decided on the form

 

kawaii~

 

the rest

 

Congrats on the fast progress, Dutch. I'm excited to see what happens next.

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Guest Anonymous
shitpost

 

I ninja edited the form. Thanks, I'm really excited too, I couldn't have hoped for progress this fast.

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Guest Anonymous

day 22

We're getting there. The sensations I feel are becoming stronger and more pronounced, and are starting to get distinct feelings to them. Is this the emotional speak you guys talk about here? Besides that, I sometimes find myself hearing thoughts, in my thoughtvoice, that don't seem to be mine. They're worded slightly different, or even voice an opinion different than mine. I need to work on being able to distinguish Yuki's voice from mine.

 

I haven't had any more auditory illusions, unfortunately.

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day 26

I've been having more and more thoughts in my head that aren't mine, and was even able to establish a little back and forth a couple of times. Wow, this stuff could actually be real. :^)

 

At one point I was reading a book on philosophy and started thinking about whether the concept of God could be related to the tulpa phenomenon (won't go into that too much), and I asked Yuki "are you god?" She replied with a loud and clear "yes". I then asked her if she would be so kind to grant me a snack if that was true, and she gave me a cookie in our wonderland. It's silly, but made me laugh, and it's huge progress to actually be able to hold conversations at times.

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day 36

We're developing vocality more and more. I can hear Yuki in my thoughtvoice regularly now, and I often notice emotional impulses from her (usually if she's angry). Vizualisation takes no effort, and Yuki moves by herself now. I'm glad I started this.

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day 40

Yesterday, taking some illegal drugs, I heard an auditory illusion from Yuki again, this time saying a longer phrase than before, which seemed to be nonsensical japanese. It was pretty rad.

 

Also, she made me stop smoking. ;_;

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