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KM & RD


KruegerMeister
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7/2/14: When I took a step, my foot rolled on one side, like it had been doing for several days. Today, it hurt a lot, but just for a second. I asked Rainbow Dash how close that foot was to breaking (although my doctor said that the problem was with an unused muscle, not a stressed bone), and she estimated one or two days(' worth of rolling on that foot would break it). When I ate out at a restaurant, Rainbow Dash pecked at some bread like a chicken. She did the same with an orange slice. I don't know why. When I wrote that last sentence, I got an image of her trying to stifle a laugh, so I guess she did it as some kind of joke.

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7/3/14: We didn't really do much today. I apologized for this, but RD shrugged. She showed me her sweatshirt. It was black with some segmented red lines. I'm not sure if I unknowingly added to the basic design or not, but, as I thought about the design, the lines made a rhombus on its side, with an X intersecting it, and two lines on either side of the X that seemed to divide imaginary quadrants into thirds. All of the lines extended a short distance past the rhombus. When next I saw her (about 9:50PM) she was skeletal/lanky. She looked visibly disturbed (e.g., http://www.insimenator.org/index.php?PHPSESSID=dd76b7bd6cc6fac218722c6aa5e9762e&action=dlattach;topic=10796.0;attach=10968) when I accidentally walked through her. When she flew into my room, she returned to her normal pony appearance, like being there rejuvenated her. When I thought I was being a bad host, she said I wasn't. When I accidentally walked through her a second time, she ignored it. When I brushed my teeth, she appeared as aforementioned thin version of herself. I asked her to not look like that. Her stomach grumbled, and I pointed out that by talking to her, I was paying attention to her, and therefore feeding her. She snapped back to her normal pony appearance like a rubber band. I told her to use the mental/psychic cord we'd set up to get my attention instead of appear as the lanky pony. I bent down over the sink to spit toothpaste out of my mouth. When I looked up and in the mirror, Rainbow Dash was the lanky pony once again. I told her to use the cord, and she stifled a laugh. I pretended to be mad that she would joke about this. I let her hypnotize me to be my OC, and we hung out in our wonderland. I said that I should listen to a soundboard to hear her speak in different emotions, because most of the time her mindvoice sounds unsure of what she's saying.

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7/4/14: When I said that the "altered brain wrinkles=psychic powers" system in my novels doesn't need to be explained, she said that, "Yeah, it does." I realized that tulpas could potentially fuck with their host's heart rate and breathing. To counter a potential negative feedback loop/self-fulfilling prophecy, I asked myself what possible reason they would have to do so, seeing as their existence depends on the host's existence (trick question, they wouldn't have any reason to). When I imagined Lanky!Rainbow Dash using that to get my attention, I repeated a mantra of "she wouldn't be that desperate". I also told myself that "the fictional villain I made pretends to be a tulpa, and brings harm/distress to his 'host'. He's not really a tulpa; therefore an actual tulpa wouldn't do such things."

When I wished RD a happy 4th of July, her mane briefly turned into fireworks. While reviewing everything before this sentence, I changed "to counter this" to "to counter a potential negative feedback loop/self-fulfilling prophecy" and RD helped me do so by saying that "stuff like [what you're worried about] only happens on 4Chan."

We watched Family Guy together while I was browsing Fundies Say the Darndest Things. Many of the comments on the page I was reading said the...OP, I guess, was on drugs. I was wearing a furry blanket, furry side down, which I’d previously worn during a pony hypnosis trance (to simulate fur), so it may have been a trigger (on a previous occasion when I was in the same trance, I felt loopy/high); I'm not sure if it was just the blanket, or some combination of the blanket, the site, and/or the show (TL;DR: I ROFLed and I'm not sure why). I asked RD, and she said "my money's on the blanket." While reading FSTDT, I muttered "Jesus Christ" in response to the hilarity of the comments on the site, then laughed at the irony of using the exclamation "Jesus Christ" in response to a site about fundies, at which RD just smiled and shook her head. New idea: somehow associate the blanket/hypnosis-induced euphoria with Rainbow Dash's presence, which will hopefully create some sort of feedback loop (or something) that can be used to kickstart imposition. This post is so detailed that it seems like a story I'm making up XP.

Edited by KruegerMeister
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7/5/14: I eavesdropped on my parents before RD could dissuade me by saying "haters gonna hate". Turns out they were talking about how I ate a lot of Pop-Tarts. RD advised against making a bad joke. I'd heard that it was possible to fall in love with one's tulpa. When I thought about that, I got a minor hollow/warm feeling in my stomach, not sure why. I later (around 8:00PM) ranted to myself about my friend's ignorance/misconceptions about Furries. RD said I seemed mentally unhinged during the rant, specifically the part where I said that I wouldn't talk to my friend in person, because nobody can know what they'll REALLY do in a given situation. I asked RD about my last post, and she said that the info about the blanket may have been TMI. When I watched "Hellraiser: Hellseeker", she briefly appeared as a pony version of Angelique (http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-8aPehFlms_8/UPS4zKDpwzI/AAAAAAAAGHQ/8AbC3czzZeo/s1600/hellraiser-angelique-12.jpg )

Edited by KruegerMeister
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7/6/14: When I asked Rainbow Dash about it, she said that my parents were slightly onto her existence (I talk to myself a lot, but have recently caught myself talking to RD out loud on several occasions). When I saw the really fancy dinner my mom had cooked, I mentally joked, "Tonight, we eat like kings", and RD waved a stereotypical ermine cape over her shoulder. When I watched a recording of MLP, I fast-forewarded through the intro. I thought this was because the intro was cringe-worthy, but RD said it was a fear response (what would my parents think if they heard me watching a show with an opening theme like that?). When Hellraiser: Hellseeker was fresh in my mind, I saw Lanky!RD holding a kitchen knife (not dangerous, just weird).

Edited by KruegerMeister
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I wonder sometimes if people are on to me too. I often say Fench's name out loud when talking to her, and I worry sometimes that people are picking up on it. Most people don't know about tulpas though, so maybe not.

"Some things have to be believed to be seen." - Ralph Hodgson

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Heh yeah I've done the fast forward trick more than once during a brief stay with parents - I lurk a lot but I'm readin' this daily just so y'know and whatnot --

 

Only problem is my tulpa Vixen has seemingly inherited your RD's lanky pony trait - she's not a pony but she seems to change her mouth to be un-naturally wide to be creepy at times- blatantly for the same reason. Happened around the same time as I started following you a week or so ago. Heh. Thanks Dash!

 

Ugh she's doing it again..

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(edited)

Does Vixen do it to get your attention? I think Dash started doing it because I saw two very gross pics online and thought "those ponies look malnourished". She appeared in a malnourished state before, on 5/16/14, but I'm not sure if that means anything.

I think a good solution to your problem would be to do what I did on 7/3/14 and...some time in May, I think (the entry in question must've disappeared when the site momentarily went down). In practice: setting up some way for her to contact you (as an example, I tulpaforced a cord that RD could tug, which would result in a tingle on the back of my scalp), and explaining to her that she should use that instead of a creepy appearance.


7/7/14: I imposed RD's lanky form next to her normal form, and set the lanky form on imaginary fire (like this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s6x47TCpP2A, 5:31) to kill it off (fire gets rid of germs/bacteria on food). RD said that said form was a method of identity-discovery, but I killed it. She was being really dramatic when she said that, so I'm 99% sure she was joking. We didn't hang out much.

Edited by KruegerMeister
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Heh yeah I think she just decided it would be a good way to wind me up/creep me out - kinda like what happened a few posts back with the brushing teeth incident. She's not exceptionally vocal ATM but seems pretty aware of what she's doing and finds it downright amusing to wind me up esp. In inappropriate situations. My fault I guess for choosing mischievous as a character trait ^^;

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7/8/14: I thought about Rainbow Dash, and then noticed that "our song" (Creep) was playing on the radio. I thought that it was some sort of quantum thing, but RD shook her head. When I thought my friend was saying negative things about Furries, I went to eavesdrop, but RD said "haters gonna hate". I ignored her, but she put a hoof out to stop me. When I reviewed past entries in my PR log, she said that the bit with Twilight's mindvoice on 4/21/14 was her (she was the one praising me, in a different mindvoice). Much like how I kept seeing Lanky!RD after seeing a similar pic on the Internet, RD appeared as a male after I looked at fan art of "him". I figured out that the main reason Lanky!Dash creeped me out was because that form was hyper-realistic, and all of Dash's other forms have been animated. I was about to tell Dash about how I'd come a long way in my writing career (at first, the only established rule of my magic system was that it couldn't be used to harm people, but somewhere along the line I'd scrapped that and developed a system inspired by Fullmetal Alchemist), but then I wondered if she could know that, since the one-rule system was made a few years ago, before her creation. She said that she could only access some of my memories, and that I should go to bed (as of this sentence, it's 1:40 in the morning).

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