Earthquake's PR Journal

[Earthquake]

I'm making her repeat everything she says. It's working pretty good so far, though its starting to annoy her because I just keep saying "what" everytime she says something until it comes out a bit louder and clearer.

[Cinemaphobe]

I'm making her repeat everything she says. It's working pretty good so far, though its starting to annoy her because I just keep saying "what" everytime she says something until it comes out a louder and clearer.

 

Lol sounds like something Yumi would do. Good luck my friend!

[Earthquake]

Thank you cinema.

 

Nothing new to report as always just a general update.

 

No new improvements on any kind of imposition.

 

We are definitely having conversations where as 5-6 months ago they where extremely one sided.

 

April 18th is her birthday, the day I stared creating her, as opposed to June 27th, the day she started talking. Still trying to decide what to do. We both enjoy food so probably gonna be food related.

 

Not mine, just a picture of a fat Weiner dog that makes us smile.

[Earthquake]

I drank this Ready to Drink Prework out thing before lifting last night and I had the best work out of my life. I was at the gym for over 3 hours and had to force myself to leave, my body just would not get tired. It was like 1000x an energy drink it was incredibly intense. The bottle said drink half but the guy working assured me, that despite the warning labels I would be fine drinking it all. No, I wasn't.

 

My mind was super alert and focused and I could see it maybe helping with forcing but I wasn't really trying for that at the time. I took it at 1 am and it lasted like 12 hours. The first 5 weren't bad but then I just couldn't calm down, I couldn't sleep, and my stomach started hurting and my heart was beating hard and then I read reviews that made me freak out and it was absolutely horrible. Elia babied me. Reassured me I would be fine and talked me through it, very logically and calmly and talked reason into me.

 

That stuff was no joke. Without Elia I probably would have talked myself into going to the hospital, and I was afraid to take my xanax because I don't like mixing drugs I don't know about, but I am really glad I had someone to talk to.

 

We ended up watching tv. We watched Last Man on Earth, and then What's Eating Gilbert Grape. She really liked that movie a lot. I ended up being able to fall asleep around 1pm for a coupla hours, and I feel better but not 100% normal.

 

We also went out to T.G.I.F. last night with a coupla my friends. I kept forgetting about her, even though going in I had planned on trying to keep her on the front of my mind, for the most part. She shrugs and says its whatever she got to enjoy the food anyways.

[Earthquake]

I've been going to the gym with my buddy and his girlfriend. Hes been working out for 5-6 years now, and while hes a short dude and not massive, he is quite swole and can out flex me by so much so easily. He also is going to college to become a physical therapist, so he knows a lot about health and fitness. Hes my go to when I have questions or if I need help working out. Hes been getting me and his girlfriend into better shape, and hes doing a damn fine job. When I work out with him I am 10x sorer the next day compared to when I lift by myself.

 

My self esteem has increased, Elia says she's very proud of me, I'm seeing progress on my body. Things are going pretty good at the moment.

 

Over the past couple of months Elia's voice has fluctuated between periods of being stronger and weaker, currently being kinda weak. I hate active forcing, I just can't sit their and focus. Sometimes when I do it we have good talks, but other times I just hate sitting there and thinking. I can passive force with the best of em, its natural, and she's always not far from my thoughts, excluding when I'm in social situations. She's understanding, but I hate using active forcing as a treat for her, or a compromise to something.

 

She doesn't want to say anything directly, but she does want to get it across that she understands how it is for me, and that the passive forcing I do is more than fine.

 

There's more I feel needs to be said, but we can't decide what it is and this post actually helped by getting our feelings out there and all that mushy shtuff I do feel but don't like expressing. Soooooo we are just gonna leave it at that until next time.

{I do say I'm the shit, if I do say so myself.}

[Cinemaphobe]

I'm glad that you are working out! Exercise increases oxygen levels in the blood which in turn increases the amount of oxygen in the brain consequently improving cognition.

 

What's funny is that you are amazing at passive forcing while I'm amazing at active forcing. Your weakness is my strength and your strength is my weakness lol. I'm sleepy--don't judge my temporarily poorer than usual writing skills.

 

Oh and I'm glad to read that your life is going well--better than ever in fact.

[Earthquake]

Thank you Cinema. I wouldn't say my life is better than ever but I definitely feel better than I gave in a long time. Idk if you've tried the rope trick but I've found it helpful while passive forcing, especially when walking around stores and what not. Just imagine a rope or string connecting you and your tulpa.

 

I ate a fortune cookie that I had gotten from some Chinese food I had the other day, which coincidentally Elia had asked me to save. The fortune said, "A modest man never talks to himself." Found it kinda relevant and it made me laugh.

[Earthquake]

Voice and presence has been getting stronger. Her birthday is on Saturday and we are excited, gonna spend a lotta time together that day. We where at the grocery store about 4 days ago, and we where looking at cake. I decided why not get her one for her birthday. I was gonna wait till it got closer but she was persistent in letting me know she really wanted one. So I said sure why not I got the money and I like cake too why not get it today, and in my head I could see her fist pump, head down and eye closed, and yelled "Yes I'm getting a cake!!!" It was actually pretty loud. I couldn't help but smile, I felt her happiness and excitement and I don't like mushy words but it was sorta cute. We ended up getting a banana cake, it was pretty good. {I liked it.}

 

Had nothing to do the other day so we decided to just swing by a couple stores, I needed to pick up a prescription anyways. We went to about 2 clothes stores and a book store. We ended up buying this book called The M.D. By Thomas M. Disch, which has praising by Stephen King on it, has so far has been pretty entertaining. I've been wanting to get back into reading for awhile now, and I have the time I just haven't had the motivation. Elia nudged me into doing it because its something we havnt really done before. After the bookstore we got some tacos, and she saw a buffet and wanted to go but I had already bought tacos so tough luck Elia. I ended up goin to lunch there the next day because I promised we would. Very sub par Chinese buffet but it was a lunch with Elia so it wasn't all bad. She's getting treated like a Queen her birthday week now that I think about it.

 

I woke up this morning multiple times and kept passing back out because each time I woke up, I was in a nice dream. During one of em, Elia somehow in my half asleep mindset, got me to do a bit of forcing, and she led me down a market place, (this wasn't a dream).

She was showing me the food they had on the table and had me visualizing it as real as I could, and we did pretty good. I feel asleep not long into that but it was definitely pretty cool.

 

Working out is going good, I like it a lot. Its not something I can really do with Elia I think of her when I'm there occasionally, but if I'm not using an elliptical or treadmill, my full attention is on the work out I'm doing. But after I'm done, on the drive home and the rest of the day, lately at nights, we talk a lot more. Slowly but surely progress on my body is being made. And Elia some bit faster and surer.

[Earthquake]

Been putting this off so badly. Shoulda updated on Elia's Birthday but didn't. Her birthday was on April 19th. We watched what she wanted, ate what she wanted, did a bit of forcing. Pretty much gave her the day. It was fun we enjoyed ourselves.

 

Had a lucid dream a couple of nights ago, and when I realized I was dreaming, I decided to try and pull Elia into it. It actually worked and she looked different with similar features, she was wearing glasses though. Didn't last horribly long but it was definitely worth noting and the main excuse shed been using to make me update this.

 

Sooo since last post only fun things in my life are gym, Elia, and then we saw Avengers together that was fun. Been meaning to start Buffy the Vampire Slayer over again so Elia can enjoy it, been a couple years since I've last seen it. But I the mean time, King of Queens.

[Earthquake]

I stopped updating this but I haven't left Elia, she's still around on the daily. I dont really have much to update on, I just see a lotta abandoned progress reports only to wonder if they gave up on forcing. I still lurk here couple times a week.

 

Elia's alive and happy, and we have grown closer. I dont active force but shes always on my mind and no matter what I'm doing or where I go she's with me. Blah blah blah, maybe I'll do a more complete update sometime soon, maybe not. Just wanted people to know I ain't quit.