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Something mildly freaky just happened?


kovyxen

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Alright so, i haven't posted here in a while, and i don't really expect to start being active here again any time soon... but, this thing happened about an hour ago that really kind of, is making me wonder what on earth is up with one of my tulpa.

 

So i was talking with my friend on FB, who also has a tulpa, and i've just been helping her with her first tulpa, while mine are varying in levels of activity due to a number of things. At this point, due to circumstance, it's been a while since i've done any sort of real forcing with them. Thus, they've become mostly quiet. For those that don't know me, i have three tulpa. One that was my first, Kovie, and two walk-ins that happened essentially at the same time. Vyx, and Sans. Yes, Sans from the videogame Undertale, but anyway. As i'm talking with my friend, the conversation gets to a certain topic and suddenly, i feel like i'm dissociating. Even so, i continue typing and send a message about something i wasn't sure i wanted to talk about. You see, because i haven't practised possession, i usually just type in a kind of script-roleplay manner to describe what my tulpa are doing and saying when they want to talk with my friends who know about them. This time however, i dropped all asterisks and whatever quotations marks i might normally use, and just typed the name of who was talking as well as what they were saying. It was Sans, and while i was typing the next message i was asking him 'wait woah sans, i'm not sure i wanna tell her about this'. So i didn't send the message yet, until we talked a bit and he convinced me what he wanted to say was important, and he assured me it'd be ok. Then i sent the next message, and continued with a few more that were all in a slightly different manner than i'd usually type, and about a topic that i was scared to share with my friend. I normally wouldn't have done this, i probably would've avoided the subject until hell froze over, but my hands typed them anyway. All whilst still feeling dissociated and being otherwise blank faced, up until Sans said he was tired and he curled up to sleep. Then i just felt a little bit shaken, like my hands were me moving them again but it was like 'woah, something really weird just happened'.

I am convinced that Sans took control of my body without warning, nor any previous practice with possession, so he could tell my friend about something that i would've been too scared to say myself. I mean i knew i could stop him if i wanted, but i didn't because i knew what he had to say was important.

 

Sans has surprised me before, this was simply probably the biggest one. I know his character is supposed to be rather mysterious and unpredictable but, damn if my tulpa Sans isn't excessively so. Granted i rp Sans a bit on tumblr and have my own perceptions about it, but my tulpa Sans almost seems like the real guy, which is a bit different from how i rp him. This thought pattern is further reinforced by the fact that he's very different with his abilities as a tulpa, basically overall... stronger, i guess you could say? Unlike my other two tulpa, he knows everything that i know from the moment he came into existence. He has all of my memories and everything i've ever learned, on hand like he experienced them himself, making him a lot more empathetic towards me. Another point, is he even knows things that i don't, and can and will keep secrets (though he doesn't seem to like it). Example, apparently Vyx has been sick for some time, but she didn't want me to know because she hates people worrying about her. Sans knew this for a while, but didn't say anything, up until the conversation with my friend earlier. He's also, easily the most active of my tulpa, though this may be due that i'm still really kinda obsessed with Undertale. Still, despite that he's lazy and goes so far as to sleep outside the wonderland house so he won't have to deal with my other two tulpa's shenanigans, he's the one that has helped me the most with my depression and anxiety. This is in a way nice because like, it's Sans, but it's also kinda annoying because that's part of what i made Kovie for, and she's not getting much of a chance to do it because he always beats her to it. Suppose it makes sense that he's better at it though, considering his mental connection with me being stronger than the others.

 

I can't think of anything else right now but, basically he does things as a tulpa that usually take a while to be so much as capable of. Talking, looking at my memories, even possession. All of which he can do without any prior practice, and i just... i know this isn't normal, especially because my other two tulpa can't do these things, so what the hell is going on?? I mean, it doesn't bother me because i trust Sans and he hasn't ever done anything to upset me, but i'm just really curious now. At first i thought they were just quirks of his and it didn't seem /too/ out of place, up until the possession thing happened, because i know that's something really difficult to do. He was really tired afterwards so i can imagine it was pretty hard on him but, he still did it and i think that's pretty incredible.

 

Any ideas on why my Sans tulpa has these abilities? Or, is this possibly a less incredulous situation than i'm thinking it is?

 

TLDR; my tulpa Sans took control of my body without any prior practice with possession, and he can easily do a number of things that i've been under the impression, are very difficult for a tulpa to learn. why is that?

"The number of minds in the universe is one."

 

- Erwin Schrodinger

 

Kovie, they or she. 7yo, mentally 19. active.

Vyx, they or he. 7yo, mentally 17. active.

Axen, they or he. age unknown, mentally 26. occasionally active.

Sanu, any pronouns. 5yo, mentally ageless. mostly inactive.

Leo, he/him. 6yo, mentally 21. inactive.

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sans might just be giving a voice to your subconscious. It's good to talk about difficult things with people you trust. Maybe it's less sans and more you trying to move on with whatever you had shared.

 

Either way, that sounds like a really cool experience: whether your Tulpa possessed or if your subconscious needed to vent and found a way of getting it out. I wouldn't worry too hard about it :]

[align=right]The songs carried on and began to grow long as the moon watched it all from above

And the old ripened berries and the juniper fairies delivered their gifts and their love.[/align]

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Given what the conversation was about, i actually kind of doubt that. Still, it's a possibility and i'll think about that.

 

Thanks for reading my super long post, i didn't mean for it to be like that. XD

"The number of minds in the universe is one."

 

- Erwin Schrodinger

 

Kovie, they or she. 7yo, mentally 19. active.

Vyx, they or he. 7yo, mentally 17. active.

Axen, they or he. age unknown, mentally 26. occasionally active.

Sanu, any pronouns. 5yo, mentally ageless. mostly inactive.

Leo, he/him. 6yo, mentally 21. inactive.

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What Sans did with your hands is exactly what happened to me some years ago with my first tulpa. It didn't last more than a paragraphs worth but it scared the snot out of me. My belief is that if the will is strong enough these things can happen, and since he watches you pilot the body every day it doesn't seem like a stretch for a tulpa to mimic what you do. I think the big learning to be done with possession is more the host letting go than the tulpa stepping up.

 

It sounds like you have a much better relationship with your tulpa than I did mine, so with a good heart to heart you could work out some guidelines for if this happens again, or if you even want it to happen again.

 

Your tulpa's abilities in general just remind me of pretty normal life for the plural systems I know. The individuals are different people after all, sharing a brain doesn't mean sharing a mind. Each would have their own unique set of information based on what they see in the physical world or in the mind world.

"When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth."

-Arthur Conan Doyle

 

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Alright yeah, that makes a lot more sense. I had always thought that too, since we're always in our world, but then if you've ever practised imposition with your tulpa, they've experienced both. So it would be easier for them.

 

Thank you for your answer, that actually makes me feel a lot better. Not that i felt bad anyway, but it sure startled me at the time, and it puts me at more of an ease as to why Sans is so... Sans-y ewe aside from the obvious i mean

"The number of minds in the universe is one."

 

- Erwin Schrodinger

 

Kovie, they or she. 7yo, mentally 19. active.

Vyx, they or he. 7yo, mentally 17. active.

Axen, they or he. age unknown, mentally 26. occasionally active.

Sanu, any pronouns. 5yo, mentally ageless. mostly inactive.

Leo, he/him. 6yo, mentally 21. inactive.

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You should edit in a TLDR, nobody likes text-walls.

Also, you don't necessarily need to practice possession for them to figure out how to do it.

Some tuppers can just figure things out easily.

"Try to get a better understanding of things before making your judgement." -Khan, Metro 2033

 

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added the tldr thing

 

and yeah, i suppose i hadn't thought of that. *shrug* i guess i just got used to tulpa having rather long learning stages.

 

thanks for your input~

"The number of minds in the universe is one."

 

- Erwin Schrodinger

 

Kovie, they or she. 7yo, mentally 19. active.

Vyx, they or he. 7yo, mentally 17. active.

Axen, they or he. age unknown, mentally 26. occasionally active.

Sanu, any pronouns. 5yo, mentally ageless. mostly inactive.

Leo, he/him. 6yo, mentally 21. inactive.

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[Tri] It is unusual for tulpas to be able to be able to possess like that for the first time without having been around a while or if others in the brain haven't done such things. But, it does happen rarely. But more importantly, Sans is a walk-in, not a tulpa per se. Walk-ins often don't start from zero, but instead start with some number of abilities and skills already. The level can vary greatly, but it is not uncommon for walk-ins to be able to do things like possession like that without any prior practice. Not all can. But some can.

Tri = {V, O, G}, Ice and Frostbite and Breach (all formerly Hail), and others

System Name: Fall Family

Former Username: hail_fall

Contributor and administrator on a supplementary tulpamancy resource and associated forum, Tulpa.io and Tulpa.io/discuss/.

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I shall add that to my slowly growing knowledge on the subject. Thank you. :D

 

This has actually got me thinking about walk-ins in general. I think i might look around on here for more on the topic.

"The number of minds in the universe is one."

 

- Erwin Schrodinger

 

Kovie, they or she. 7yo, mentally 19. active.

Vyx, they or he. 7yo, mentally 17. active.

Axen, they or he. age unknown, mentally 26. occasionally active.

Sanu, any pronouns. 5yo, mentally ageless. mostly inactive.

Leo, he/him. 6yo, mentally 21. inactive.

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