Experiment Log: Will Repeated Actions Lead to Switching?

[Ranger]

I feel like something like rythem games or speedrunning would be more helpful since they would be repetitive and require focus, and also once you get good enough it is mostly reflexive rather than with conscious thought. That sounds like exactly the right recipe to switch. Changing what game you playing often probably won't help very much either.

 

Those are just some suggestions though

I suppose I could attempt speed running cheap golf. Although, I find that some of the games can get boring and I lose interest pretty easily. When Monika rode your bike, did she enjoy it every time or where there days it felt mundane?

 

---

 

I couldn't resist.

 

Start: 6:59 pm

 

End: 7:43 pm

 

I felt like most of that was intense focus and repetition honestly. I beat the level I was stuck on :D

[Breloomancer]

She enjoyed, after all she was the one who would always ask to front while doing it; it was somewhat mundane, but that doesn't make it bad.

 

If precision and repetition aren't your thing then you don't have do it, but I would like for you to give it a try at least

[Ranger]

I keep playing cheep golf in an in-private browser, every time I play it I clear the data after awhile. Maybe I can keep playing it until I get a hole-in-one on everything.

[Ranger]

Cheap Golf

 

Start: 10:01 pm

 

End: 10:21 pm

 

I felt done after playing for a little while. I'm trying to hole-in-one everything.

[Ranger]

I told Cat's brother about cheap golf and we decided to try and race each other. In the beginning, I focused on getting the lowest score possible, and in the end I focused on getting the level completed. Cat's brother beat me, and I never finished the last level because I was tapped out, frustrated, and my hand is sore.

 

Start: 3:18 pm

 

End: 5:02 pm

 

I didn't realize two hours flew by while we were playing. After two hours of playing and previously at least an hour of chatting with Cat's brother, I feel pretty stable. I talked to Cat a little bit afterward and while she could have gone back to the front I wanted to keep fronting and I didn't get too much resistance.

[Guest]

I call this progress, did it feel like you're getting somewhere?

[Ranger]

I call this progress, did it feel like you're getting somewhere?

 

It may take awhile before the effect becomes obvious.

 

As an interesting note, Cat caught me biting my thumb nail when I'm focused. It could be universal, but Cat thinks it's a me thing.

 

Just a short run for roughly 20 minutes today, starting from the very beginning. Yesterday I figured out how to use click lock, and I like the mouse much better than my hand on the touch pad.

 

6:46 pm

 

7:07 pm

[Ranger]

Another 21 min playthrough from the beginning:

 

11:47 am

 

12:08 pm

 

Turns out the thumb nail chewing is a habit we have caught Cat doing too. This time I felt a little uneasy because I wonder how much of my thought was lost in thought. It almost felt like Cat was playing, but it's not too easy to tell. Maybe I feel more unstable because I haven't had the chance to front much today.

[Ranger]

Geez, 10 days ago is too long of a break. Today's run was a little longer anyway:

 

7:12 pm

 

7:28 pm (break)

7:32 pm (break end)

 

7:53pm (37 min total)

 

I made it all the way to qwest this time. Even with the click lock on, it was harder to play because the mouse kept double-clicking the ball.

 

I noticed that my time playing sometimes helps, but only if I do it for a longer period of time. Next time, I'll shoot for my sessions being a minimum of 30 minutes long. Otherwise, having fronted (possessed) before hand for a longer period seems to make me feel more stable regardless of what I'm doing. If anything, I've figured out how to one-shot some of the levels, which is cool I guess.

[Ranger]

For as much as playing Cheap Golf is fun, I don't feel more likely to switch. Part of the problem could be Cat's interested in sticking around to see what happens, even though she's not actively thinking per se. I want to take a break from Cheap Golf and try something else.

 

I thought about some of my previous frustrations with possession and realized something. If possession is very much a mind set thing, why wouldn't switching be? It seems that some systems more naturally pick up switching than others. I know Cat has trouble with relaxing, so having Cat trying to force dissociation on the fly may not be enough...

 

And then I came up with this idea- Teaching Cat to dissociate with conditional training. Here's the process we tried:

 

1) Cat lays down in a comfortable position

2) Both of us agree to the switch

3) I tell Cat to breathe and relax for a bit, but for maybe a minute.

4) I tell Cat that she isn't allowed to move her arm, other arm, leg, and other leg. I slow down if Cat needs a little more time to settle in.

5) Eventually, Cat isn't allowed to move if she's fronting.

6) I then decide to take the front, and I move the body freely.

7) Cat returns to a fronting position to believe her body's still locked and she can't move.

 

This repeats until Cat gets bored and lets go. This time, Cat can try to take the front if she gets nervous, only she's not allowed to move. Having me move the body when I'm fronting will prevent the feeling of Cat being "trapped" or get anxious about being "paralyzed".

 

We practiced for a few minutes just to get the feel for it.

 

6:31 pm

6:37 pm

 

Next time, I want to try the following things:

• I don't want Cat and I to constantly alternate who's fronting too often. The goal is a stable switch. If Cat feels like she has to move, I have to take the fronting position and move for her. When this happens, I may want to spend a minute or so fronting and then let Cat front in her "locked" position.
  
• I don't know if this will flow into a switch, I'm kind of thinking by itself it won't. I'm hoping that this is a more gentle way to teach Cat how to dissociate, and with enough exposure and practice she can hopefully dissocate a little easier. If Cat does learn how to dissociate but this method doesn't lead to a switch, then we could try applying a guide and hopefully getting better results.
  
• I want to extend the length of these sessions until Cat can dissociate more easily. Next time I want us to shoot for something closer to 10 minutes.