The Long Story of Nonsense

[Guest]

So they wed, and the supreme leder became Maya Moldenhauer-Heart

[Redacted System]

Because of this, the Cuphead DLC got delayed.

[Tanaka Kanade]

But Half-Life 3 was confirmed

[Guest]

But Microsoft was doing it in a partnership with EA, EA is writing the ending. Thus the seventh seal was broken, and I beheld a deathly mare with a rider dressed in black... you know the drill.

[Redacted System]

It was a 12V Ryobi cordless drill.

[Guest]

That caused the nuclear meltdown.

[Tanaka Kanade]

On Mars, where no humans were, only fish-people

[Guest]

Were in danger of extinction due to lack of potable water.

[Tanaka Kanade]

So they decided to turn all the paper clips on earth into water!

[Guest]

Joy:

 

But getting those to Mars wasn't something they thought about ahead of time. Man, who's left making these decisions?