The creation of Seren

[LifeInside]

 

Oh, I got that a lot early on when I was communicating with Sceena. I'm glad to say that it's probably your tulpa, but skepticism is probably still good to have at this point. Ask Seren to surprise you sometime, and see what happens.

 

 

I guess this might be Seren? Maybe you could ask her to replicate the feeling.

 

 

I don't see why it wouldn't be a good idea. It feels to me like you're trying to force yourself to get immersed into your imagination. It's not a bad idea, but I don't think this'll help.

 

Oh well those are great news then! I'll ask her both to surprise me and to replicate the feeling. Thank you very much :)

[LifeInside]

January 01, 2016

 

Happy new year to everybody!

We sadly weren't able to do much active forcing the last two days. Yesterday we did a little though.

I've realized that I may have been seeing signs of sentience:

I firstly started imagining Seren in an invented anime form with orange hair, and dressing jeans and a red sweater.

As time passed by, her hair changed to black, and so did the colour of her eyes. I believe I did NOT make these changes (although I do like them to be honest). They just happened.

Also: the other day, during an active forcing session, we were dancing to some classical music and, out from nowhere, she was wearing a white dress! (Which looks lovely in her, too). Now, every time we dance, she wears it. Are these changes product of her will and should I consider them sentience signs?

Thank you!!

[Paranoid Llama]

Yeah.

[LifeInside]

Yeah.

 

Great then!! Also, thank you for keeping up with our progress report, we really appreciate it :)

[Paranoid Llama]

Yeah.

[Vos]

Those seem like signs of sentience and deviation, yes. For more narration material, you could try asking why your tulpa chose those things, if she chose the white dress to fit with the type of music, etc.

[LifeInside]

Those seem like signs of sentience and deviation, yes. For more narration material, you could try asking why your tulpa chose those things, if she chose the white dress to fit with the type of music, etc.

 

That sounds like a good idea, thanks a lot!!

[LifeInside]

January 02, 2016.

 

It's been a week since we started! And it's been great!

 

Yestarday night, I wrote to Seren for the very first time. It was a letter that said how awesome this week has been, and how wonderful it's been for me to have her around (even when I can't hear her yet), and things like that. I'd read it's a way of forcing, and I found it a pretty tender one.

What I did was think of her while writing (write to her), and, afterwards, read it to her.

We may be doing this again, I really enjoyed it!

 

Today, I bought a poetry book and we've been reading it since then, so Lovecraft will have to wait for a little.

We're still doing narration mostly, in different ways. And also still visualizing when actively narrating. I believe it works for us.

Also, it seems like Seren wants to wear that lovely white dress everytime now! I'm happy about it.

 

That's pretty much everything for now :)

[LifeInside]

January 03, 2016.

 

What a productive day today was! Have a lot of things to tell/ask.

 

Firstly, we finished reading the poetry book.

Then, we tried something new. I was reading the tips and tricks section, when I saw one that supposedly helps with vocalization. All I had to do was play a song in my head and imagine Seren singing. So, we did it.

I actually played a couple of songs in the real world with the guitar, but I did not sing. I visualized the whole scene in wonderland and there she was, singing and even dancing to it. Right now I can't tell whether the dancing was me puppeting or not, but I believe I shouldn't worry about it.

I've kind of stopped seeing puppeting as a bad thing (not too much, though). Is this alright or am I making a mistake?

 

Anyway, later on, I did not know what song to play, so I asked Seren to choose the one she wanted to sing. I had to ask it a couple of times until the word "Yellow" (from Coldplay) popped up in my mind. So, I assumed it was her and started playing. A minute later, still playing Yellow, I made a mistake and I heard something like "you silly!" and I laughed. I'm assuming that was her as well. What do you guys think?

 

Afterwards, we had an active forcing session. I tried to make "unusual and exciting" things with Seren, such as flying around, bungee jumping,... and I tried to make them feel as real and intense as I could. In order to succeed, we followed a visualization guide which intendes to inmerse the host into his imagination by trying to "activate" the five senses. I had to go through each one of them, one by one, until I could feel them all at the same time. To be honest, it's a tricky thing, but we won't give up on it.

Anyway, here's the remarkable thing: I've been asking Seren to surprise me during the last days. And I've got nothing... until today. I asked her and, after a couple of attempts, suddenly, I was in the outer space. I could see the earth. Anyway, after a few seconds, I started falling right to a lake where Seren was waiting for me.

The thing is: I DIDN'T expect to be taken to the outer space, but I did kind of know I was going to end up back in the lake with her... Should I still believe it was her, or was it a trick my mind played on me?

 

Thank you!

[LifeInside]

January 04, 2016.

 

Oh well, there's not much to report today.

 

We didn't active force today (to be honest, I fell asleep pretty soon on my first try... looks like I was too tired), but we'll do some before bed. Hopefully I won't fall asleep so fast this time.

 

On the other hand, the good news is I can see improvement when it comes to narration. I know it's the easiest thing, but it's been difficult for me to direct my thoughts to Seren without picturing her in my mind (and that's been becoming less and less neccesary).

 

Anyway, today I read The Circular Ruins by Jorge Luis Borges to Seren (since I'd read it could be related to tulpas), and I actually enjoyed it. I highly recommend it. :)

We also tried the vocalization tip again. Nothing to report about it.

 

That's pretty much everything for today. Tomorrow will be a busier day than usual. There'll be a lot of passive forcing, I believe; but less active forcing too.