tulpa001 March 14, 2017 March 14, 2017 Darn. That bumps me down to at most fourth best overall. I understand. I know I have been off chat for a while now. Hope you feel alright. Don't go making decisions like that so quickly. Host comments in italics. Tulpa's log. Tulpa's guide.
Andrew Powers March 14, 2017 March 14, 2017 I've voiced this earlier I believe, but golly goodness, sweetheart, I am so, so so so SO relieved you are still here! No one in this world is worth your own dissipation, no matter what. You are a gift to this world, meant to shine in your own way and contribute until the end as we all are, and I don't believe the world would be the same without your light in the mix. THAT SAID! Even with a light having gone on its own way, there is a vast, vast ocean of lights to follow! There are others to love, to cherish, and my doll, you will find those lights! Just keep in tip-top, keep your eyes on the prize of life and keep on finding new reasons to love yourself, your existence, and those around you! Love to you, and have a wonderful day! P.S.: Yellow is adorable, you should wear it more often! Remember: Every day you've woken up, alive, has the potential to be an amazing day. You are all wonderful people who deserve to be here and be alive!
acutelatios March 15, 2017 March 15, 2017 Oh dear, I'm really glad you're okay Annabell. I nearly did the same myself not too long ago...but really it's hard to see other people or even reason when you're that much in despair. Still, I'm glad you got pulled back. Please take care of yourself. And that goes for the rest of you too. ❤ If you want daily updates on shenanigans we go through, here's my tulpa blog! Dagny | James | Rick | Morty | Veto | Sansy | Gaster | Eras
Ponytail March 22, 2017 Author March 22, 2017 So, more updates, less suffering. Today, Annie tried to make friends. There's this gal in my class and she's really smart and hella cool and so this last week I decided I'd message her on Facebook because talking in between classes gets you nowhere with knowing someone. I told her about my tups and she had the most rational, accurate reflection over it than anyone else I've met has (read: She didn't say schizophrenia). I told the tulpas about this and Annie immediately started saying garbage like "So, wife material." Regardless, she and I discoursed over the topic and then she decided after learning more about this gal (We'll call her... hmmm... Meg), Annabell said "Hey, I'll possess next morning and go through your first class and talk to this girl. C r i n g e y a s h e l l. It was a rather brief interaction but Meg seemed rather... comfortable. It was weird to me, normally people ask questions and start treating my tulpas like they're new people to them (which they are, but, y'know). Meg just... continued in conversation with Annie as though they'd been friends for a short while. Annabell liked it, so maybe we'll repeat it, maybe we won't. Really, I don't like my life being taken over by a tulpa and I imagine some friendships would die if Annabell possessed every morning and kept telling my friends to go away, lol. More progress though, this time on ME! I know, fascinating isn't it? Anyhow, during this "switch" I realized something. While I am fully dissociated it's like I'm staring off into space. It's not hugely fascinating, I'm aware. However, this is significant progress from not being able to dissociate from the eyes at all. Might I say, it's a little strange to realize your eyes have moved since you stared into space. Meh, I'm rambling. Annabell is wearing the classic purple today, though she assures me she's going to dress like "A casual dweeb like you" tomorrow. The System: It's too big. ha, that's what she said.
tulpa001 March 22, 2017 March 22, 2017 Oh, Annabell, please don't scare off all his other friends. :p I hope someday to have my own cringeyasallhellmoment. Host comments in italics. Tulpa's log. Tulpa's guide.
Ponytail March 27, 2017 Author March 27, 2017 Oh, Annabell, please don't scare off all his other friends. :p I hope someday to have my own cringeyasallhellmoment. And now me talking to anyone is going to be "Cringey as hell." Also, if you have a Discord, I'm on the Reddit chat (never use it though) and you can shoot me a friend request there and maybe we can do a voice chat one day. As for progress. Omega is now "trying out" Christianity. Which, when a miracle happens before your very eyes, it doesn't surprise me that he is acting strangely out of character. This isn't a pulpit though, so I won't go into detail. But, the miracle was interpretation of tongues (if you don't know what that means, PM me or something) and he said something along the lines of "They spoke with the same authority I did" and I responded "Where do you think I got that from?" Next thing is Tula, who changed her form. she's no longer extremely goth as I made her *sigh*. My last fingerprint on her form, damn. Oh well, she loves the new form and frankly I think it's fantastic to look at. She kept her body basically the same, however her skin tone is a tad darker (so she looks Caucasian now, not gothic irish). She also changed her hair to be green and has those fairy wings from SAO's second arc. At first, she wasn't wearing any clothes and uh, she's hot as hell so that made things awkward because she's asexual and I'm definitely not. Luckily, modesty won out and I told her to put on some clothes and now she wears a simple green nightgown. Though, she plans to accessorize because she wants something to look flashy. Annabell also made a minor change in form at my suggestion, and now her eyes are gray. I'd say it fits her better. Plus, it's easier to imagine. The System: It's too big. ha, that's what she said.
Ponytail March 27, 2017 Author March 27, 2017 Oh! I remembered something thanks to Saylin's PR, I took those 4 letter Jungian psychology tests with tuppers. Me, Myself, and I: INT(P/J) (P and J flop, though most of the time I get P) Annabell: ESFP Tula: ENTJ Now, on IRC and Discord, bitch at me to finish Omega's The System: It's too big. ha, that's what she said.
Ponytail April 11, 2017 Author April 11, 2017 You guys are bad at bitching at me. Jokes aside, it's my fault that I have nothing here. So, Omega is INTJ. This is strange, I thought he would be extroverted. Actually, fuck test results, he's extroverted. The only reason he gave introverted answers is because of meme magic implanted into my brain that the government hides in vaccines. I've cracked the code! Idiocy aside, it has been a looooooong time, and as usual this is going to be a short ass PR. I doubt this will be updated all that often anymore. Recently, Tula has been longing for huggable people. I say that, because if I say "real" when I mean "People I talk face-to-face with" you'll receive it as "Wow this cuck is worse than Mistgod and Melian (of whom I will from now on refer to as M&M), he thinks we're fakeasafpoiasjdfoai." Thing is, it's beginning to occur to me how difficult it is for me to find people willing to talk to tulpas. At school I have a circle of (gimme a sec I have to count) about 23 friends. Okay, that's two circles that hate eachother, point is, I've told almost a dozen of them, the ones I thought would be able to handle a loud cover of Randy Orton's entrance music, and of those, 3 wanted to talk, and 1 was someone my tulpas wanted to talk to. Why the fuck is it so hard to make friends for my imaginary friends, for fucks sake? Omega is still Omega. Recently though, he has stopped killing NPCs. Tula has kinda become his tulpa, he forces her more than I do. As a result he's acting more... regal, I guess. It's difficult to detail because he's still very much so himself but Tula has been reforming him on little things like being a huge fucking sadist. Meh, if you want to see the results, talk to him. For now... see you in the next PR 5 years from now. The System: It's too big. ha, that's what she said.
Ponytail April 14, 2017 Author April 14, 2017 It's been five years. Don't believe me? Check your calendars. I remembered something I wanted to talk about a long time ago, when we started fully possessing and the like, about proxying. For the most part, I proxy my tulpas... I think. It is impossible to tell what happens beyond that because now that the others can take control, they seems to do it on accident. In order to explain this, I'll give an example. I was once proxying Omega for a group chat. During the convo, I was going to get up and go get something and I didn't. It was then that Omega and I realized that he was in control. He just sorta shrugged and continued typing. But then I took back over and I realized this when I wanted to take my laptop over to my bed. However, I couldn't tell you when I took back over. This nonsense mostly happens with Omega, but Annabell takes over on accident all the time (She did it once because she read aloud something someone typed on my phone). Tula is a deliberate effort still, not sure if that's a blessing or curse. This, of course, gets a little awkward when I have to force my speech because my sister interrupts Annabell reading something and I don't know that it's Annabell reading it until she opens the mouth to speak and it's her speaking and so I have a short mini panic and quickly try to reattain control and in this lengthy turn of events, I finish by saying, "Yeah?" This, of course, only gets fucky with voice and I'm trying to maintain control of the body. When my tulpas start proxying each other but I'm slipping in and out of control and so are they... Agh! It's not painful or frustrating it's just very... loopy and you begin to feel less real, if that makes sense. The System: It's too big. ha, that's what she said.
tulpa001 April 14, 2017 April 14, 2017 I can relate to that confusion about who's controlling. Man, it gets smoother. I am operating under the assumption that paying close attention helps speed the process. Though, that can't be proxying. Either eclipsing or possessing. Host comments in italics. Tulpa's log. Tulpa's guide.
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