I can't, sir, it's liquid!

[Ranger]

I want chocolate drink, carb free, calorie free, as delicious as real chocolate, and no caffeine either.

 

Okie dokie, I have to go to get some cocoa butter, some zero-calorie sweeteners, some chemists, and some chefs. The chemists ans chefs take the flavoring extract from cocoa butter (zero caffeine), mix in some Olestra, and add the sugar. After that, they cook it into a highly concentrated syrup. Next, I grab some carbonated water from the store, add the syrup, and bam! Chocolate soda, calorie free, caffine free, and delicious.

 

Enjoy your drink good sir.

 

Draw me a square circle, pronto!

 

Bam.

 

 

I would like a parrot that can fly through walls, or really anything (except the floor, I don't want the poor bird to die).

[Trusty McCoolGirl]

It's okay, the parrot is already deceased and is a ghost. I'm very sorry for your loss, but perhaps you will enjoy the gain of your new pet. : )

 

Please fetch me a balloon that doesn't float.

[Guest]

A lonely lead balloon salesman just got his wish.

 

I want deer flavored icecream without any actual deers involved and no artificial chemicals.

[Michen_S]

All right. We just used chicken, since everything always tastes like chicken anyways.

 

I would like some toilet paper. However, it's for a prank, so I need toilet paper that's completely invisible.

[Guest]

ಠ_ಠ chicken icecream isn't the same...

 

Yep, it's wonderland paper, uh... oh, that's not for irl use.

 

I want a hamster sized elephant.

[Tanaka Kanade]

There is a parallel dimension where hamsters are the size of elephants; ergo, all elephants are hamster-sized

 

I wanna take a family vacation to that dimension, open me a portal or something

[Matsuri]

Take the red pill and you'll see that elephants has always been hamster sized and vise versa. Which would also mean they are the same size. But what size?

 

Cut me some slack

[Ranger]

 

Done.

 

I want original art of Ranger without the use of physical art supplies, without a traditional art program like ms paint, adobe, or gimp, and it can't be stolen art that Bear or I drew.

[Michen_S]

You didn't really give me a reference, so you'll have to do with this.

https://i.pinimg.com/736x/da/7d/9a/da7d9aab1aae680515a80f6a2715e000.jpg[/img]

 

I want soap that completely prevents me from getting dirty again forever.

[Tanaka Kanade]

This soap is acid; it dissolves your body as an ad hoc means of preventing you from getting dirty

 

I want to be able to print money without causing inflation