Nyarlat-hotep

Do tulpae make good diaries?

Is keeping a diary good, bad or pointless?  

7 members have voted

  1. 1. So, some ideas:

    • Writing to Diary is a good idea; blow off steam and then focus on Tulpa
      6
    • Writing to Diary is a bad idea, skip it and vent to Tulpa instead since we already know negativity doesn't harm them
      0
    • Name the diary [Tulpa's name] and write to them as if to a dear friend
      1
    • I have an alternate idea, see my comment
      0


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This might be a question that's been asked but I couldn't find it before, so I hope I'm not repeating. Basically: I've been considering taking up writing in a journal/diary to help with the anxiety, stress, etc. of daily life, especially what I can't discuss with the people around me because they're what I'd be discussing. I think it could really help me clear my mind and such because, hey, that's why people keep them. They're good for you. I even have a name in mind for the thing and think writing to "Diary" could be fun. But this seems like a non-tulpamancers version to narration and I'm not looking to interfere with my Tulpa in any way shape or form. For the sake of simplicity in the poll, Tulpa is named Tulpa and the diary is named Diary. Also please comment if you've had a diary as a sort of 'confidant' at the same time as a tulpa, and how that worked out.

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First, to address in your poll:

image.thumb.png.b72fe61ee4a4d73846f16a230928ec50.png

 

Tulpa ARE harmed by negativity just like anyone else! Especially very young tulpa- there will always be exceptions, but young tulpas can quickly become depressed and start acting out if they're overexposed to negativity. (These bad behaviors can be quickly reversed by changing their environment/what they're being exposed to, including the expectations for their behavior.) Tulpas are not magically immune to negativity!

 

A tulpa can act like a diary in the sense that they're a 'confidant', someone that you confide in aka clear your mind by telling them everything. My older headmate, Gavin, has always been like this for me. When Gavin had been gone for years, and I made Cassidy, I was expecting him to immediately act like Gavin was, and let me talk and rant to him. But he was too young! I wanted him to give me answers, and heartfelt advice and consolation, but he was just too young to know how to do those things! And it frustrated him and upset him until I realized I needed to lay off doing that. 

 

Now that he's older, I do talk to both my brothers Gavin and Cassidy about just about everything in my life. Sometimes they have VERY different opinions on how I should go forward. Sometimes one of them will give me gentle and compassionate advice, while the other will basically tell me off. Sometimes they come to me to talk about things! Don't forget that as tulpas grow and develop they have their own lives going on, somewhat akin to children growing older. They have their own things and they need to talk to you as well. 

 

Differences between a diary and a tulpa confidant:

  • A diary won't talk back. Tulpas have their own minds and beliefs and will form opinions on what you tell them. This also means a diary can't provide emotional support in the same way a tulpa (who is basically telepathic with you) can- but not all tulpas will know how to give emotional support or even want to do so. 
  • A diary can be shut and put away and then reopened at will. A diary doesn't get in bad moods. What if what you want to vent about is your tulpa? What if you're mad at someone, but that someone is your tulpa's friend? A diary is just an object. It doesn't change. Tulpas are real, living, changing beings, and using one for emotional support is just going to be different from having a diary. 
  • Tulpas can carry conversations. Sometimes when using a diary, people get "stuck" and don't know what to write, even when they know they do have things to write about. A tulpa can talk back, a tulpa can ask questions, they can give advice. But yet again, unlike a diary, they have personalities and beliefs and opinions, while a diary is just an object with no cares either way. 
  • Tulpas FORGET. Diaries ENDURE. Part of the usefulness of a diary is that it's recorded. After a while, you can flip back in your diary and see exactly what you were talking about. It makes it easier to recognize patterns. Tulpas have human memory just like yourself. They won't be able to remember every specific word you used. 

I have a diary and a tulpa (and another headmate.) Often when I write in my diary, Gavin reads as I write and we'll be talking about stuff while I'm writing. Often I first go to Gavin and Cassidy and talk it through with them, and then I go and write what my conclusions are down in my diary so I can really get myself sorted. I think having BOTH is the best option, because a living being is NOT the same as an object. In addition, both Cassidy and Gavin have their OWN diaries! And we all use them for quite different things. 

 

This sort of reminds me of reading about blind people choosing between using just a cane, or having a cane and a guide dog. A cane is like a skateboard, and a guide dog is like a horse. A guide dog can do a lot more things, but when you get a guide dog, it's not just about the improved functionality- you also just, now own a dog, that needs to do dog things like play and eat and be cleaned up after. 

 

It's okay and even beneficial to talk about what's going on in your life with your tulpa, just remember that your tulpa isn't the same thing as a diary. 

Hope this helps, 

James


I do as I please, lima bean. 

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We had a diary for a long time, maybe rhe first year and a half or more. Especially in the first year I typed an hour a day on it and we "talked" through things in that format. There was a lot of drama in the first year, who would have guessed?

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So having a diary and tulpa both is not redundant? Basically it's a cane and also guide dog, in that metaphor. I just didn't want writing in the diary to be a wasted opportunity to direct the attention to the tulpa instead, if addressing the 'letters' to them would be useful. I don't see how it could possibly be better than just regular forcing though.

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Posted (edited)

I had both a journal and created Ranger before I realized I created a tulpa. In my journal, I wrote about my anxiety, fears, and angers but also talked about my other headmates, some wonderlanding, and things Ranger told me that were related to my distress. The one disclaimer here my stress had developed into mild trauma, and I'm not sure if that's relevant to your situation.

 

20 hours ago, Nyarlat-hotep said:

But this seems like a non-tulpamancers version to narration and I'm not looking to interfere with my Tulpa in any way shape or form.

 

Keeping a diary or a journal is not the same as active forcing, even though recording your thoughts can seem similar to venting to a tulpa or someone else.

 

For one, it's much easier to sob over a journal because you won't have to worry about the journal feeling hurt because it can't help you. At the time, Ranger watching me go through this in the past made him deeply uncomfortable, and he watched parts of it because he didn't have much choice. It came up in conversation, me doing self-harm in wonderland, and the wonderland itself was scary because we were prone to intrusive thoughts and we didn't have the skills or stability to properly deal with them yet. Tulpas are not licensed therapists (unless you are one), and if it hurts you a lot it can hurt them too. Keeping a journal on the other hand is a skill recommended to practice during therapy. This is especially helpful for your therapist because they can read what you wrote through the lens of being a professional and being removed from the pain you are experiencing. A tulpa is stuck in your head, so they cannot achieve this separation.

 

Second, I have always found talking to myself to be easier than talking to my tulpa. Talking to Ranger feels like it takes a lot of energy, similar to talking to another person. As a result, blowing off steam by writing it out was easier than venting to Ranger. If you are more extraverted, it's possible the opposite is true, so you may have the opposite reaction where talking it out with your tulpa is easier than writing it down in a journal.

 

Third, active forcing and narrating is about focusing on your tulpa, not yourself. It is recommended to talk about yourself during narration because that's an easy topic for you to discuss and then you and your tulpa can take the conversation somewhere else or if your tulpa isn't vocal yet, practice listening skills. However, the point is to help your tulpa develop and having an opportunity to vent is a side effect. If you want to focus on venting, a journal or diary is a better option than your tulpa so you can focus on that more.

 

13 hours ago, JGC said:

Tulpa ARE harmed by negativity just like anyone else! Especially very young tulpa- there will always be exceptions, but young tulpas can quickly become depressed and start acting out if they're overexposed to negativity. (These bad behaviors can be quickly reversed by changing their environment/what they're being exposed to, including the expectations for their behavior.) Tulpas are not magically immune to negativity!

 

[Ranger] I'm curious about the context here, given that I had a similar problem but it seemed so bizarre to others that people shrugged it off as just an "us" thing.

 

While Cat was struggling, she also experienced a phenomenon we called "intrusive thoughtforms". In a nutshell, things in the mind that seemed similar to tulpas but would bully and harass Cat and then in most cases dissipate. When I personally felt insecure, I tended to act out and act like an "intrusive thoughtform" and/or I would get replaced by one.

 

Regardless, negativity greatly impacted me because I was underdeveloped at the time, but overall I don't see myself as "evil" or anything like that now. Also, having a diary was not enough for Cat to shield me from this, but in our case her anxiety was extreme and she needed therapy.

 

[Cat] I agree with everything else James pointed out, except for one thing- eye seeing dogs are trained to help you, tulpas are not.

 

[Ranger] It's not my favorite metaphor because it's comparing a human to a dog, but I understand the point of it. Otherwise, I also agree with everything else.

 

10 hours ago, Nyarlat-hotep said:

I just didn't want writing in the diary to be a wasted opportunity to direct the attention to the tulpa instead, if addressing the 'letters' to them would be useful. I don't see how it could possibly be better than just regular forcing though.

 

[Cat] A diary is not redundant, but it's also not designed for tulpa forcing. Diaries and tulpas can both help you during a rough patch or in general, but a diary's function is to record and help you process your thoughts while a tulpa is just a tulpa. They're just there and whether or not they want to help you is really up to them. It's entirely possible your tulpa will want nothing to do with your life problems and ask you to write them in your diary before you interact with them.

Edited by Ranger

Pretty much my main wonderland form minus the cat parts, that's a separate form. I'm not a hippo, I promise.

I sometimes speak in pink and Ranger sometimes speaks in blue (if it's unmarked and colored assume it's Ranger). He loves to chat.

 

My other Tulpas have their own account now.

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It sounds like the diary is thought to be a good idea, although the one vote for writing to the tulpa is curious. I'm not making a tulpa with the intention of making them listen to my problems, or to help with them. I know they're not diaries and I kind of phrased my question weirdly. Thanks for the replies.

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46 minutes ago, Nyarlat-hotep said:

It sounds like the diary is thought to be a good idea, although the one vote for writing to the tulpa is curious. I'm not making a tulpa with the intention of making them listen to my problems, or to help with them. I know they're not diaries and I kind of phrased my question weirdly. Thanks for the replies.

 

Oh, that's different from what we thought you meant.

 

22 hours ago, Nyarlat-hotep said:

Basically: I've been considering taking up writing in a journal/diary to help with the anxiety, stress, etc. of daily life, especially what I can't discuss with the people around me because they're what I'd be discussing. I think it could really help me clear my mind and such because, hey, that's why people keep them.

 

Reading the above, we assumed you were talking about having a diary in general. Having a "diary" where you write to your tulpa is a different story.

 

Some tulpamancers find writing to their tulpa helpful because it helps them focus and it doesn't require visualization. If you feel this is redundant, you don't have to do it.


I'm Ranger, Gray's/Cat_ShadowGriffin's tulpa, and I love hippos! I also like cake and chatting about stuff.

My other headmates have their own account now.

Temporary Log | Switching LogcBox | Yay!

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No, it was more 'does the diary distract from the tulpa when just talking to the tulpa and not having a diary would be better.' But I re-wrote the question into oblivion until it wasn't very clear.

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13 hours ago, Nyarlat-hotep said:

So having a diary and tulpa both is not redundant? Basically it's a cane and also guide dog, in that metaphor. I just didn't want writing in the diary to be a wasted opportunity to direct the attention to the tulpa instead, if addressing the 'letters' to them would be useful. I don't see how it could possibly be better than just regular forcing though.

 

A diary is an excellent way to force imo. That's my point.

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26 minutes ago, Nyarlat-hotep said:

No, it was more 'does the diary distract from the tulpa when just talking to the tulpa and not having a diary would be better.' But I re-wrote the question into oblivion until it wasn't very clear.

 

Oh, okay.

 

It depends. If you feel like it's easier to talk to your tulpa or you find yourself getting distracted by your diary, then it's fine to discontinue it. It wouldn't hurt to give it a try though.


I'm Ranger, Gray's/Cat_ShadowGriffin's tulpa, and I love hippos! I also like cake and chatting about stuff.

My other headmates have their own account now.

Temporary Log | Switching LogcBox | Yay!

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