Mass Tulpa Gender and Sexuality Discussion

[Ranger]

Given that gender sexuality are popular topics when discussing tulpas and there are quite a few research threads on the topic, I would like to help organize things by putting everything in one place. Please feel free to post any links I missed. Feel free to talk about gender or sexuality here too.

 

I excluded PRs and guides that do not spend much time on gender and sexuality discussion.

 

---

 

GENDER
 

Spoiler

Tulpa Questions and Answers

 

[11/6/21] Tulpa's sex/gender

[4/8/21] My gender vs. My tulpa('s) gender('s)

[2/11/21] Tulpa struggles with internalized homophobia

[11/23/20] Does Switching Affect Gender Expression?

 

General Discussion

 

[10/7/20] A Tulpa's Gender and Sexual Preference In Relation To The Body's Perceived Gender and Sex

[7/5/19] Choosing a Tulpa's Gender

 

Survey

 

[5/16/12] The Tulpa Interview

 

Research

 

(More threads will be added later)

 

Lounge

 

[6/14/16] LGBT Tulpamancers

 

LOTPW Posts

 

[11/23/20] Tulpa/host gender and switching

Spoiler

 

#85759 - #85767

 

#85790

 

 

 

[9/26/20] Transitioning, plurality, and sexuality discussion

Spoiler

#78855

#78871

#78882

#78886

and other posts I'm too lazy to find right now

[9/9/20] Transitioning and plurality discussion

Spoiler

#77546 - #77566

#77571 - #77586

#77591

#77611

 

 

SEXUALITY

 

Spoiler

Tulpa Questions and Answers

 

[2/11/21] Tulpa struggles with internalized homophobia

 

General Discussion

 

[10/7/20] A Tulpa's Gender and Sexual Preference In Relation To The Body's Perceived Gender and Sex

 

Survey

 

[4/23/13] Brief survey: Tulpa Sexual Interests

[5/16/12] The Tulpa Interview

 

Research

 

(More threads will be added later)

 

Lounge

 

[6/14/16] LGBT Tulpamancers

 

LOTPW Posts

 

[9/26/20] Transitioning, plurality, and sexuality discussion (#78855, #78871, #78882, #78886, and other posts I'm too lazy to find right now)

Spoiler

#78855

#78871

#78882

#78886

and other posts I'm too lazy to find right now

[9/9/20] Sub/Dom discussion

Spoiler

#77576

#77581 -  #77585

#77587

... not finished

 

 

---

 

OP Change log:

 

Spoiler

[11/6/21] Added new link

[5/02/21] Added more links, added spoiler tags for LOTPW link list because I was having trouble with the formatting

[4/30/21] Created the thread, started with a few links

 

Edited November 6, 2021 by Ranger

[Glaurung26]

Good idea! I think we already posted our thoughts so far but will chime in if anything occurs to us.

[Ranger]

I'm not sure if this thread should be included. It starts off as a typical beginner question but then it turns into something else.

[Ice909]

We can post our own two cents here, right?

Our system, gender-wise, is lopsided. Out of the 18 or so of us there are, we only have 3 girls, those being Emily, Janey, and Chloe. As some of you may know, every month we do a little check of sorts to see who wishes to be in dormancy and who wishes to be active. We do this due to or large system size and the brain not being able to reasonably handle all of us. Now, for the past year or so, the aforementioned 3 girls in our system have been in the "active" group nearly exclusively. It makes me wonder, why is that? Why is it that, month after month, the girls choose to stay(and they're very adamant about it) more-so than the guys? (For reference, the past few months has seen only myself, Layy, and Esper as the active guys)

 

Part of it may have to do with the brain trying to balance femininity and masculinity. Or maybe it's an attempt to have more variety. I can't say for certain. Regardless, none of the girls act perfectly "feminine" with Janey and Emily perhaps being described as tomboys. Similarly, most of us boys don't align with typical expectations for masculinity. Exceptions that come to mind are Rollin, Trease, Sean, and Gwen'd. Others, such as Gwen, are much more feminine, though still male at the end of the day. Of course, it's silly to assume that people are so one sided as to fit into convenient boxes of "masculine" and "feminine", so attempting to do so is a fruitless endeavor. This applies to everyone. 

 

As far as sexuality goes, most of us are bi, though not all. Exceptions being, Layy is pan, Elliot is gay, and, in her own words, Chloe is "too young to think about that." Generally, though perhaps not explicitly stated, most of us are polygamous, exceptions being Layy and Janey, who've stated they're confidently monogamous. 

 

What does all of this mean? Not a clue! But I thought we should offer our experiences. 

[Ranger]

I think it's interesting that we may or may not be trans, but our gender is heavily male dominated in our system. Everyone is comfortable with their male identity except Gray, who is currently gender-fluid. While that may change, as of now I wonder why it's been that way for so long.

 

I used to assume that since we were originally thought of as Gray's "clones", we all shared Gray's gender. However, I'm doubting that now. What was stopping him from creating a female tulpa? Absolutely nothing, in fact I almost created another tulpa- a female tulpa. I think Gray simply has an intense male bias.

 

Our headmates and I have had the freedom to explore their gender, but only two have done so aside from myself: Duck for a brief moment, and Blue questioning if he's also gender queer. More recently, I have been thinking about labeling myself as non-binary but so far I haven't felt comfortable with the idea. I don't know if it's the same sort of thing as liking your name- it was assigned at birth, it's going to be hard to let go if you don't have a huge problem with it.

 

I find it strange because I wonder what would have happened if I created a female tulpa. Would my other headmates be more open to changing their gender? Would that tulpa want to become male instead of female or do what Gray does and become gender-fluid? Why is there a huge male bias if Gray doesn't want to completely reject the concept of being female?

 

As for sexuality, things may be a bit more complicated. Gray suspects he may be somewhere on the asexual spectrum, and lately I'm wondering if I could be asexual too but not as aromantic as Gray is. Regardless, neither of us really care who we date, but Gray seems to have a bias for wanting male partners and I have a bias for wanting female partners. Blue is exploring his sexuality, he may or may not be gay or something else, but he hasn't had a crush on anyone nor considered anyone to be a significant other. Our other headmates haven't expressed a bias yet.