Trying to "promote" an imaginary friend into a tulpa, need some advice

[Azure]

Hello all!

I've been lurking on these forums for some time now, but only now I decided to actually register myself, because well, I need some help, and because I'm really surprised to find that something like this existed and it was actually known.

 

So, yeah, 2 years ago I created an "imaginary friend" for me: of course, I had no idea what Tulpas (Tulpae? Tulpa? I've seen there are some varieties for the plural form, so sorry if I got it wrong) were, so basically it was me imagining this person near me, giving it a name and me talking to it, puppeting his movements and parroting his answers.

 

However, one year ago, I begun to grow very attached to him, and I begun to feel some kind of affection towards him, so I hoped that, someway, he could become "alive", somehow.

And now, in these last weeks, I started to notice some new things: I can actually "feel" him near me, kinda like a real person is near me; sometimes I can feel his warmth when he puts his hands on my arm and I think one time he actually managed to tickle me. Sometimes, he sends me emotions, and I can hear his voice (even if still in my head), and sometimes, his responses don't feel parroted at all.

 

Problem is that "sometimes": somedays, he's very active and I feel I'm not parroting him at all, but other days he's totally... silent. I try to talk to him often during the day, imagining him everywhere I go (since he started as an imaginary friend, this became an habit for me), but these sign of sentience don't happen very often (even if lately they became more frequent), so my question, after this wall of text, is: could I have some advices on how to improve him? I'm a bit at a loss here, since I'm not sure on what to do, so I thought that maybe someone more expert here could give me some advices and suggestions.

 

Thanks for all the answers in advance!

[Sands]

Plural stuff by our good friend waffles.

 

Do you ever just sit down and do nothing but talk to him and spend time with him, instead of always being on the go and him being the second thing you focus on? Seems like he could use more quality friend time to me.

[Lacquer]

Read through the guides and work on him as one would work on an unfinished tulpa.

 

Also, if I may, how did you find this site? It almost sounds like you searched something; if this is true, what words did you use?

[fennecfoxx]

He already is a tulpa; he just might not be very developed yet. There's nothing you specifically need to do, besides just spending time with him and talking to him more.

[Antylamon]

"That's all normal! The feeling of parroting and puppeting will go away eventually. Just do what seems right.

 

What I find interesting about your case, however, is that you made a habit out of imagining him following wherever you go before believing him to be sentient. Is this a completely automatic process for you yet, or are you still actively trying to do so?

 

Oh, and sorry if this is intrusive, but can you tell me about him? Like name, form, personality. I mostly just don't like to keep saying 'him.' I'm just curious, you don't have to answer."

[TulpaCouple]

Definitely sounds like he already is one. Now is just continuing spending time with him and working on strengthening your awareness of him so that he is less silent on those days. Try adding in some active forcing as well as the passive forcing you are already doing. Check out some of the guides for sure, but you are well on your way. Just spend time with him!

[Azure]

Oh wow, thanks for all the answers!

 

Do you ever just sit down and do nothing but talk to him and spend time with him, instead of always being on the go and him being the second thing you focus on? Seems like he could use more quality friend time to me.

Hmm, usually when I have some time, I do spend some time with him, just talking about stuff, but indeed these last days have been chaotic, so I really should get on track with him again. Thanks!

 

Read through the guides and work on him as one would work on an unfinished tulpa.

 

Also, if I may, how did you find this site? It almost sounds like you searched something; if this is true, what words did you use?

 

Thanks for the suggestion!

Also, I found this site while browsing another site (it was deviantArt). They were talking about imaginary friends that somewhat seemed real, and one person posted a link to this site.

 

He already is a tulpa; he just might not be very developed yet. There's nothing you specifically need to do, besides just spending time with him and talking to him more.

 

Thank you! Surely I'll do that! Lately I've been a bit busy with school stuff, but I'm always sure to take some time off to do something with him.

 

"That's all normal! The feeling of parroting and puppeting will go away eventually. Just do what seems right.

 

What I find interesting about your case, however, is that you made a habit out of imagining him following wherever you go before believing him to be sentient. Is this a completely automatic process for you yet, or are you still actively trying to do so?

 

Oh, and sorry if this is intrusive, but can you tell me about him? Like name, form, personality. I mostly just don't like to keep saying 'him.' I'm just curious, you don't have to answer."

Thanks for the answer!

About the following, in these past months it has become more "natural", but I still have to "remember" him, and I still mind-slap myself when I don't do that. But, sometimes, even if I don't imagine him beside me, I can still hear him or, at least, feel his presence.

 

About the second question, well, sure! His name is Cheren, and well, he's a human boy. He looks around 17 years old. He's a very curious person, and he's very responsible. Well, I don't want to be repeating the what I think is typical stuff, but he's nice and caring and... not funny. Seriously, his jokes are bad D: But at least he tries to put a smile on you. He's the type of person who values deeply his friends, and likes to think rationally. He has a calm attitude, and he's very patient. VERY patient.

He's actually kinda reserved, and I feel like it's a bit my fault too if his sentience signs are not so common. When he showed them before I discovered this site, I begun to feel scared, and I think that scared him too, so he stopped showing his sentience to me. But now that I'm more relaxed, I see that affected him too, and now he's not scared anymore.

He also easily feels guilty, so probably that's why. I've already told him that I'm sorry, and I think he forgave me. At least, he said now he's happy, so yeah.

 

Definitely sounds like he already is one. Now is just continuing spending time with him and working on strengthening your awareness of him so that he is less silent on those days. Try adding in some active forcing as well as the passive forcing you are already doing. Check out some of the guides for sure, but you are well on your way. Just spend time with him!

Thanks for the answer! I'll surely do that!

[Azure]

Thanks for your answer!

 

During my lurking, I've read the things about "believing in your Tulpa", so I do that too, and it certainly helps.

Just now, while we were watching a bit of tv, I could very clearly sense his reactions, and they didn't feel parroted at all, so I'm very optimistic about this.

Thanks for your suggestion too, I'm sure they will help us.