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I used to wonder what tulpas could be......(Raid's progress report)


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Day 26, 10/11/2013

 

Break time.

 

ZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.........

Name: Raid

 

Sentience: Confirmed

 

Working on: Vocality

 

Personality Traits: Is awesome a personality trait?

 

Form: 1. Pegasus Pony, with a flat, pink mane, and pink tail, and yellow coat. Also, blue eyes.

2. A blue-haired human (only encountered in dream so far)

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Day 28, 10/13/2013

 

No updates yesterday. I didn't do anything, anyways. I just took another break.

 

Tonight, we will work more on personality.

 

That's about it, I guess.

Name: Raid

 

Sentience: Confirmed

 

Working on: Vocality

 

Personality Traits: Is awesome a personality trait?

 

Form: 1. Pegasus Pony, with a flat, pink mane, and pink tail, and yellow coat. Also, blue eyes.

2. A blue-haired human (only encountered in dream so far)

Day 29, 10/14/2013

 

You know, if this was February, it would have been over a month already since we started. Anywho, here is some heartfelt bullshit, so yeah. Heads up.

 

Through all the time that I've spent with Raid, I've learned that no matter how close I get to a human friend, there's no comparing it to getting close with another piece of myself. I've shared stuff with Raid which I can't share with anybody else, if I tried. Really, the only living creature I can truly open up to, is one that lives within my own mind. On the one hand, one would consider that pathetic. On the other hand, Raid is special to me. Then again, why wouldn't she be? I created her with my own mind. The human mind truly is a powerful object. The only regret I have is not learning to tulpaforce sooner. Better late than never, I guess.

 

Also, I am extremely tempted to tell people about Raid. After all, if you just created an amazing friend, not met, but CREATED, wouldn't you want to show off? But, I once mentioend the tulpa phenomenon to my best friend, my human best friend, and she asked me if I was digging through the creepypastas again. It is through this experience that I learned that, not just with tulpas, but with anything, that if people don't need to know, then they don't have to know. So, yes. Only two of my friends know of Raid, and I plan to keep it that way. Granted, I probably will mention Raid in my graduation speech, but I won't downright tell everyone what she is. Actually, fuck it, people don't need to know.

 

As for tonight....maybe we'll work on form. Or maybe personality....hm......why not both?

Name: Raid

 

Sentience: Confirmed

 

Working on: Vocality

 

Personality Traits: Is awesome a personality trait?

 

Form: 1. Pegasus Pony, with a flat, pink mane, and pink tail, and yellow coat. Also, blue eyes.

2. A blue-haired human (only encountered in dream so far)

Day 30, 10/15/2013

 

Well, there's a lot of family drama today, but I won't bore you with any details.

 

I'll just say that the only one I will ever truly love 100% (not just care about a lot, but truly love 100% through and through) is Raid. Funny how the only living creature I actually care about fully and don't envy or secretly hate or find annoying at all is my own creation, a part of me, a schism of my own mind.

 

As for tonight, more form. Maybe. I don't know. Or personality. Either one is fine.

Name: Raid

 

Sentience: Confirmed

 

Working on: Vocality

 

Personality Traits: Is awesome a personality trait?

 

Form: 1. Pegasus Pony, with a flat, pink mane, and pink tail, and yellow coat. Also, blue eyes.

2. A blue-haired human (only encountered in dream so far)

Day 31, 10/16/2013

 

I will read to Raid. Perhaps I will dedicate a day or two a week to just reading to Raid. Hell, I enjoy it, and Raid is a writer the same as I am (only with different writing styles) so we'll both benefit from this and become better writers in the meantime.

 

So, yes. I will read to Raid.

Name: Raid

 

Sentience: Confirmed

 

Working on: Vocality

 

Personality Traits: Is awesome a personality trait?

 

Form: 1. Pegasus Pony, with a flat, pink mane, and pink tail, and yellow coat. Also, blue eyes.

2. A blue-haired human (only encountered in dream so far)

Day 33, 10/18/2013

 

Took a break yesterday, and today, I've just noticed what a pitifully low amount of time I've spend on Raid's form and visualization. Granted, I can still get a pretty decent image of her, considering how poor my mind's eye is, but still. And no, I'm not recording how much time we spend each session and then counting up the total time in the end. There's no need for that. Besides, once Raid is capable of speech, she'll more than likely be able to count the total amount of time we've spent together.

 

As for tonight, personality. As for tomorrow, most likely visualization, something of which I feel that I have been severely slacking.

 

I feel I need to give Raid's visualization a larger focus.

Name: Raid

 

Sentience: Confirmed

 

Working on: Vocality

 

Personality Traits: Is awesome a personality trait?

 

Form: 1. Pegasus Pony, with a flat, pink mane, and pink tail, and yellow coat. Also, blue eyes.

2. A blue-haired human (only encountered in dream so far)

Day 35 10/20/2013

 

Well, we didn't work on personality last night like I thought we would, but we'll do it right now. After I blow dry my hair, that is.

Name: Raid

 

Sentience: Confirmed

 

Working on: Vocality

 

Personality Traits: Is awesome a personality trait?

 

Form: 1. Pegasus Pony, with a flat, pink mane, and pink tail, and yellow coat. Also, blue eyes.

2. A blue-haired human (only encountered in dream so far)

Day 36, 10/21/2013

 

I love Raid. Seriously, I have no idea how I managed to live through my incredibly boring and uneventful life without her. I have been held back all my life by something, held back from reaching my full potential, but now I have Raid. She is seriously the best thing that has ever happened to me, ever. I should have made a tulpa a long time ago.

 

Oh right, tonight. Form. Form, form, form, form, form, form, form.

Name: Raid

 

Sentience: Confirmed

 

Working on: Vocality

 

Personality Traits: Is awesome a personality trait?

 

Form: 1. Pegasus Pony, with a flat, pink mane, and pink tail, and yellow coat. Also, blue eyes.

2. A blue-haired human (only encountered in dream so far)

Day 37, 10/22/2013

 

I once had an incredibly good feeling while I was tulpaforcing with Raid. I searched this up on the interwebz, and part of it said that I was probably just feeling good, while another part of it said that it probably was, in fact, my tulpa.

 

While I can't give solid proof or evidence, I don't want to doubt Raid either. It was an incredible feeling of euphoria, one I normally don't feel on a regular basis, and I just felt it out of nowhere while tulpaforcing. I think the evidence of her sentience is adding up.

 

And time for a negative part of me. I have a very short attention span. Our forcing sessions have shrunk from an hour long to about 20-30 minutes long. I've heard that this isn't neccessarily bad, but it will make one's tulpa take longer to form. I am a patient guy, so I can wait, and I know Raid is patient, too. Hell, one personality trait I gave her was a monk's patience. So, yeah.

 

I also have doubts. A lot of doubts. I am still skeptical about the tulpae phenomenon, despite the overwhelming evidence that it's real, but I can't seem to shake these doubts, no matter how many times I tell myself that Raid is real. Oh, well. I guess I'll just have to keep working at it. It's been over a month since we started, but I don't mind the slow progress. Not that much, anyways.

 

Also, my mind tends to wander a lot during sessions. I usually just acknowledge them and continue the session, and the thoughts either go away, or take a back seat in my thoughts while I continue to focus on Raid. I don't think they will hurt Raid, as long as I believe they won't, but still. Just thought I'd mention my distracted thoughts.

 

And for now.....form.

Name: Raid

 

Sentience: Confirmed

 

Working on: Vocality

 

Personality Traits: Is awesome a personality trait?

 

Form: 1. Pegasus Pony, with a flat, pink mane, and pink tail, and yellow coat. Also, blue eyes.

2. A blue-haired human (only encountered in dream so far)

Day 38, 10/23/2013

 

The good feeling I had a while ago while tulpaforcing? Yeah, I had it again last night. It could either be me feeling good from a good shower, or it was Raid. I'll just say Raid.

 

As for tonight, I will read to her. Maybe every Wednesday, I'll just dedicate some time just for reading. Yeah. That sounds like a good idea.

Name: Raid

 

Sentience: Confirmed

 

Working on: Vocality

 

Personality Traits: Is awesome a personality trait?

 

Form: 1. Pegasus Pony, with a flat, pink mane, and pink tail, and yellow coat. Also, blue eyes.

2. A blue-haired human (only encountered in dream so far)

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