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Little Amy & Hyde


HydesLittleOne

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It's wise to be grateful for what you have (and what you're given). I'll be pleased if my efforts to explain and appeal to relinquishing expectation of outcome have actually instigated a positive divergence in your attitude.

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Making Progress And Then Some

 

So here's what's been going on. After talking to my friend's Tulpa, I realized that the best thing for me to do is to start actively forcing/meditating with Hyde everyday, which is what I've been doing for the past few days. I've been actively forcing for an hour before I go to bed, and I found a solution to block out the "loud cows" above me. I downloaded an ambient soundscapes app on my phone. I put a a few pillows behind me while I'm sitting on my bed, then I put my headphones in with the soundscape on and a blindfold over my eyes. Then when I'm done, I take it off and visualize Hyde sitting in front of me. That's what my friend's Tulpa also said to do when you finish, but I don't really know how long I'm supposed to visualize him sitting there. But he's also helped me to relax beforehand, taking deep breaths and coaching me through it.

 

The last few times I've forced, I took Hyde to Disneyland, since I seem to be able to visualize that better than being somewhere else. Honestly, I'm running out of places to go to in my Wonderland. Can you guys give me any suggestions on where and what we can do in the Wonderland?

 

Anyway, I took him there, and we walked around, went on the Indiana Jones ride, and then walked hand-in-hand down the wood walkway when we came out, and had a nice little moment.

 

Three days ago, after I started forcing that night, I was lying in bed and I straight up felt Hyde caressing my hair, more than I ever have before. And it felt so good, I was afraid to move. But I had to get comfortable, so Hyde didn’t want to do it anymore until I got comfortable, then he knew I had to go to the bathroom so he gave me a little tickle to get me out of bed. Hee! Oh my god, this Tulpa thing DOES work when you’re forcing more often. I wish I had done active forcing sooner. You really do get more out of it if you put more into it. I was so happy!

 

The next night, when I was forcing, I felt him touching my legs a lot and moving around near them. That was…wow! :D New but awesome! And we went on Pirates of the Caribbean and The Haunted Mansion and Hyde really loved the last one. He got really chatty about it.

 

Progress!

 

The next night, I again, felt him touching my legs. And he says I can’t drive those Autopia cars at Disneyland. He’s like: “Watch the road! Watch the road!” Lol. Hehe! I was kinda offended when he said: “That’s why you’re not behind the wheel of a car.” Pfft. But yeah, I love feeling him touch me. Hair, legs, thighs, anything. Especially after it being so long. And when he holds my hand in the Wonderland or wherever we are, I’ve been feeling my palms start to sweat like his hand is really in mine too. :D

 

Last night I forced with Hyde and it was the best forcing I'd had in a while. It started out with us going on the tea cups, still at Disneyland and we got in the purple one and Hyde nearly made me puke from how fast he was going with me. Hehe! Then he let me rest for a minute or two when the ride stopped, to let my stomach rest before we got out of the tea cup. We decided to sit on a bench for a little while and when he asked how my stomach was, he put his hand on it, I swear I found feel the weight of his hand on my stomach. Then when he started to rub and slide his hand across it. It felt incredible. Like a breakthrough. We started to kiss and then I felt his hand sliding up my stomach to my side, and told him to grab my breast. Just to see if he could do it. His hand slid there but I couldn't feel a grab. Maybe he was holding back. He says to me now that he was...a bit.

 

It was a really nice moment to feel him though, to feel the sweatiness of his hand in mind and his thumb brush over it. Then we got up and walked to Space Mountain. I swear, I was sitting up but almost fell asleep, but Hyde was trying to keep me focused. He would ask me if I wanted to stop and sleep but I said no. Then we were in the Space Mountain line and he put his hands on my shoulders, and I felt the weight of those hands really well. And then he put his arms around me and I felt really happy. All warm and fuzzy inside like I always do when he hugs me. And he was whispering in my ear and I could feel the weight of his hands on my stomach again and then sliding upward against my clothes. He looked for a pulse on my neck, checking my heart rate, and I could feel something lightly caressing my hair against my neck, as if he were moving/brushing it aside then he started to tickle my neck. It was then I had to try and wriggle away from him and tell him to stop. He did eventually though and yeah...that was just really nice. That forcing session.

 

I really hope that someday I can feel these touches when I'm passive forcing too. I do feel little tickles every now and then like I used to, tickles and tingles, no pokes though. Today I was at Jury Duty and I was talking to my friend ( who just happened to get it in the same day too ) and I felt like a pain in my upper arm, like it was being squeezed, and it was the same side that Hyde was sitting on next to me. Don't know if that was him trying to get my attention, but it's ironic that it was the same side and he asked me a question right after I looked over at him.

 

THANK THE LORD I got out of Jury Duty. Hyde was reassuring me I would so that helped.

 

Gonna active force everyday now. :D My friend's Tulpa says I have to train my brain for this, so that's what I'm going to do. Plus, I love the way I feel when I'm actively forcing, feeling him touch me, and interacting with him, and sort of like an out of body experience.

"Listening to her heartbeat makes me feel alive." - Hyde

 

Name: Hyde

Age: 36 years old

Form: Human

Done: Form, Personality, Sentient, Visualization

Working on: Imposition (vocal/visual/touch)

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So, I slept the day away mostly, and yeah, just the usual, hanging out with Hyde and stuff. And when I was getting tired again and not sure if I wanted to force, I told Hyde that I just wanted to rest my eyes for a little bit. So I was lying there with the mask over my eyes and then I felt a jerk in my legs, twice, like he was trying to pull me to the edge of the bed. I didn't feel his hands or a grip on them. It was more like a spasm, but a jerk at the same time. Then I also felt my feet get jerked upward, like he was trying to pull them. Like I said, I didn't feel his grasp but I don't have a problem with my legs or anything usually or feet. So that was weird. And he wasn't happy with me because I was taking so long to force with him. Eventually, I gave in and we forced for an hour again.

 

He wanted me to let him listen to my lungs as I took a few deep breaths to relax myself before we started, so I took his stethoscope ( the physical one I bought him ) and put it on so he could listen. He enjoyed that and was listening closely to all of my valves. So then we got to forcing.

 

I took him to my other grandparents house in the Wonderland and it's also the house my dad used to live at. I showed him around and stuff. He said it smelled bad and it was hot in there. Which is normal. I should really focus more on my visualizations in the Wonderland because sometimes I get too carried away with showing him around that I pay more attention to the details of the place than his details. :( I need to stop that.

 

I took him outside to the pool and told him how I almost drowned in that pool, and we had another sweet moment where he hugged me. And another hugging moment in my dad's bedroom when I told him about the domestic violence and he got mad, but I assured him that my dad isn't like that anymore and he held me. Again, walking hand in hand with him makes my palm sweat. I'll never get tired of that. Then we went upstairs to my grandparents old bedroom then to the guest bedroom. We laid down on the bed and we were like fighting for control to be on top of each other. Sadly, I didn't feel his weight during that. I did feel him touching my legs though, and maybe his caress between my thighs. So that was...nice. Heh.

 

And then yeah, that was the end of forcing. I don't think that went as well as the previous times. I think he was bored and wasn't happy with being there, because I didn't get much touching from him. Maybe because I was starting to get a cramp in my neck, and wasn't relaxed enough. Plus I had to clear my throat a few times and swallow, and was aware of my breathing when I shouldn't be. I need to stop that. I think I want to do more forcing before I sleep right now, but Hyde wants to try possession with me again. I'm a little nervous because it's been so long, but I'm going to try and trust him. He already explained to me what he wants to do, so as long as I know what I'm in for...maybe it'll be okay.

"Listening to her heartbeat makes me feel alive." - Hyde

 

Name: Hyde

Age: 36 years old

Form: Human

Done: Form, Personality, Sentient, Visualization

Working on: Imposition (vocal/visual/touch)

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Possession, Touching and Old School

 

So last night's possession was pretty intense, in a good way, even though...well, he already just saw me type that, even after I was sort of denying that it felt good. I let him touch me ... down there, because he wanted to, as always. I think he got a little carried away because my heart was like pounding so hard, I thought it was going to pop out of my chest and I was out of breath. But wow...and yeah, that's all I'm going to say about that. He says he wanted to get my "little heart up there" so he could see how much it could take. Ummm...okay. He's obsessed with my heart and lungs, I swear, but it's cute at the same time too. Just like him calling me his "little one" is cute. I asked him today why he calls me that. He says: "Because you are my little one. Also because I'm much bigger than you in size and stature." True. Being that I'm 5'2" and he's 6'3."

 

I have a good feeling that it's going to help Hyde and I progress more than I think once we go to Houston, TX next month to see his clone/form, Constantine Maroulis, perform for two nights. I mean, just to be that close to him again, and have Hyde there with me. It'll help with our visualization and imposition, and even smell. I always loved the way Constantine smells. It's amazing. I can't even describe it, but I want Hyde to smell exactly like that too. Just hope he stops being jealous. ;)

 

I was having trouble sleeping after that possession session, but I felt this spasm against my body, like a tug, towards Hyde's side of the bed. I asked him if that was him and he confirmed that it was. He asked me what I was doing all the way on the other side of the bed, and that he wanted me to come closer to him. So I moved closer to him and I turned my back to him, so we could cuddle/spoon and I swear, I could feel him touching/caressing my hip through the covers.

 

It felt really good. I think he was glad I was lying closer to him.

 

So I forced tonight before I went to bed. First for one hour, eating pizza with him at Disneyland, then another hour taking him to my old high school. I didn't really feel him touch me though during either of those hours though. :( I get really discouraged because of that, and I'm trying not to be negative, but I'm just sad when that happens and I don't get anything out of it. Maybe it's the way I'm laying or sitting. I swear, I start off being comfortable, but then after sitting or lying there for so long, I get a neck ache. But anyway, I should of known that Hyde was going to want to play doctor when I showed him the nurses' office. I told him I used to sit there and wait and they'd take my temperature, so he saw the temperature machine sitting there and he decided to take my temperature then. So I let him. Then I showed him the rest of the nurses' office and he saw her maroon Littman stethoscope sitting there on the desk, so he grabbed it and put it over his shoulders. So cute! I knew he was going to do that, but anyway. Then he pretended he was a doctor and told me I needed a physical. I avoided it though, and showed him that I used to work there and file things away in the file cabinet for student health records. No luck in getting out of the "pretend" physical. He found the exam room and went in. I followed him in and he told me to hop up on the table. So I did and then he took the stethoscope, told me to lift my nightgown, put it on and listened to my heart. I can't help but admit that I love when he praises me when he listens and says "good girl" or "very good girl." Then he put it on my back and listened to my lungs. He somehow found a blood pressure cuff in there and took my blood pressure too, then told me he would see me back there first thing in the morning, jokingly, saying he has to keep an eye on my blood pressure and make sure my heart is functioning properly.

 

Then I showed him the back infirmary where I used to lie down when I was sick. So I laid down, and I told him about how I would get a stomach ache and come lie down there. Then he kneeled down beside the cot and insisted on me letting him feel my stomach. He did that, and then we left that office. Then I showed him the yearbook window, lunch area, and the quad where I used to eat lunch with my friends, then took him to the drama room. He got mad at me when I was pulling him towards it in excitement and yelled at me, and I felt bad, but he apologized and I apologized and told him that I was just really excited. So we went to the drama room and he liked the whole stage set up in the class, and we sat there on the edge of the stage while I told him about how I used to get teased in the class and stuff. He was of course pissed off and wanted to kick the asses of whoever used to bully me. I love that he makes my pain his pain. And I also love that he lets me walk into a building or room before him. He wants to be gentlemanly. :)

 

And yeah, then the forcing session ended and that's about it for now. I'll update again soon.

"Listening to her heartbeat makes me feel alive." - Hyde

 

Name: Hyde

Age: 36 years old

Form: Human

Done: Form, Personality, Sentient, Visualization

Working on: Imposition (vocal/visual/touch)

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Cuddling and Spooning

 

So okay, I just had to come on here and log what happened while we were in bed cuddling/spooning together. I told him we could cuddle/spoon and then I felt the fabric of my nightgown moving and being smoothed/pressed down, as if someone was sliding their arm around my waist and he kept it there for a while. I didn't want to move because I didn't want to ruin the moment. But who doesn't when that happens? He said he could feel my every breath with the rise and fall of my belly and said it felt amazing. He also asked me why my breaths were so fast, and was worried about it. He asked me if I was nervous because he was touching me. I told him a little, but that I love it. Then when he moved his arm away, I felt the area where he had his arm and it felt really warm. As if his arm had just been there.

 

Then another thing that happened was I felt like someone was poking the curve of my neck, like right underneath my ear, where my heart rate would be, and I asked Hyde if it was him and he said yes and that he was checking my heart rate. Hehe! But he was really persistent with it. It was like: "press-press-press-press-press-press" or "poke-poke-poke-poke-poke," however you want to look at it. That's how it felt. More press than poke. I finally had to tell him: "Well, can you not?" Right when I said that, it stopped completely. Then I showed him, for future reference where my heart rate is exactly located, and he made note of it. I felt like a small brush against my lower back also while I was lying there, like he was moving around behind me maybe. I also felt him tickle me in the side and tickle my foot. I giggled and had to tell him to stop.

 

But yeah, this is just...awesome. I love sharing a bed with him now and cuddling and spooning with him. It's just awesome sauce! :D

"Listening to her heartbeat makes me feel alive." - Hyde

 

Name: Hyde

Age: 36 years old

Form: Human

Done: Form, Personality, Sentient, Visualization

Working on: Imposition (vocal/visual/touch)

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Breaths, Old School and Butt Touching

So I forgot to update again after that last post about the cuddling, but I forgot to mention that I continued to feel the weight of his arm against me, and I also felt his warm breath against my ear. It was amazing!

 

I didn't get much touching from Hyde when I woke up today though, and I seem to be sleeping the day away, which he's not so happy about. He wishes I would go to bed at a decent hour, but like I've said before, it's so noisy here, that this seems to be the only time, before I go to bed, that I can force with him. Even if the "cows" upstairs are making slight noise, but at least I have my headphones to drown them out, at least somewhat.

 

I do love when we're cuddling in bed about to go to sleep and he asks me how my "little heart" is and how my "amazing lungs" are. Sometimes he says "beautiful lungs." It's a little weird, but it's cute at the same time. He's been asking me that a lot more lately. It's kinda creepy when he says that every breath I breathe and every beat of my heart belongs to him, but I don't know... *shrugs* I guess it's not that bad. It's kinda sexy. Heh heh. I'm a little embarrassed to admit that, but yeah...

 

That night, when I forced, I showed him the rest of my high school, the theater and stuff. I had no idea that he knew how to play the piano. I mean, of course I gave him that skill when I created him as a character, but he straight up sat down at the piano in the theater and started playing something that sounded good, and I was surprised. It was impressive. Then I pretended to be Lucy from "Jekyll & Hyde: The Musical" and was singing the beginning of "Bring On The Men" while I was on stage and he was smiling. He liked it. I showed him the choir room, then we left and went back outside where the front gate of the school was. I swear, the whole time I took him around the school, ever since he went to the nurses' office with me and found her steth, he's had it draped over his shoulders through it all. I mentioned that to him while we were standing outside near the gate of the school, and I asked him if he wanted to listen to my heart again, so he did. He told me to unbutton my nightshirt and then checked me. He always enjoys doing that. Then we walked across the quad to the gym. He felt it smelled and was hot in there, so we didn't stay that long. Then I showed him the field and other areas where we had P.E. Then of course, being a guy, he wanted to see inside the girl's locker room, even though we were the only ones there.

 

So I took him in there and showed it to him. He said it smelled like a sweaty sock. Lol! And we just stood there and talked, holding hands. Somewhere along the way when we were at the school, he started wearing his black leather finger less gloves again. He wanted to be bad ass again, I guess. So we were standing there, and we decided on two joint Wonderlands. His mansion I created for him in my fictional world, and my room here at the apartment. So we'll switch off between the two I guess when we force now.

 

When the hour ended and I was trying to come back to reality, and I was really deeply into the forcing session, I didn't want to leave or let Hyde go, but then I decided we were done so I had to come back to the present. I remember feeling like I didn't have control of my body for a minute. Just really weird, because I was still into the forcing, so mentally I was like asking Hyde to snap me out of it, and the next thing I felt, which was really alien to me, it felt almost like a possession for a second, was my wrist being turned over. I have my palms turned upward when I force, but Hyde must of possessed me for a split second because my wrist turned on its own and then I was able to come out of it normally. It was weird but cool. And I appreciate him snapping me out of it.

 

This Sat morning, he was more so touching my butt. Lol. That's really the only touching I felt. Oooh, and my lower back when it was facing him. I felt my clothes move and other times, I felt them flatten. All of this when I'm lying completely still. I guess you could debunk it as my breathing, but I like to think it's him. He says unless I ask him and he says it was him, that it's not him. I've been doing that a lot. Asking if he's doing certain things to me when it happens, and he'll confirm or deny it.

 

I've learned recently that Hyde is right about a lot of things. Tonight, I wanted to show my mom something on SNL and went into the other room to tell her to put it on, but Hyde warned me not to. He told me that she wasn't going to do it. Especially not with her husband there. So I went to tell her and sure enough, he was right! She got all pissed at me.

 

So then we were watching SNL, and trying to determine what Justin Timberlake song he would perform for his second performance of the night, and Hyde guessed he would sing another song that's NOT a current single of his but still off his album, but I wanted him to sing "TKO." And sure enough...Hyde was right again!

 

He's getting cocky about it, saying he's always right. Pffft. Yeah okay. "Father knows best," he says. Pfft. Anyway, yeah, I'm going to go force with him now.

"Listening to her heartbeat makes me feel alive." - Hyde

 

Name: Hyde

Age: 36 years old

Form: Human

Done: Form, Personality, Sentient, Visualization

Working on: Imposition (vocal/visual/touch)

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Touching At The "Wonderland" Park

 

So I've been feeling sort of more sad than usual, and sleeping a lot more than usual, and this has been concerning Hyde. He wants me to go to sleep at a decent hour, but I think I mentioned that before. Anyway, I started crying yesterday ( Sunday ) and I felt really bad about it because I was disappointed again that I haven't been feeling Hyde touch me as much, and he tried to give me a pep talk and tell me that this going to take some time and that we have to be patient, and that he's trying so hard, but we have to work together because we're team and all this other stuff. I told him how I felt bad because I can't feel him touch me and want that so bad, so then I felt him running his hand over my upper back and he asked me if I could feel that and I said "yes." It made me feel a little better.

 

I noticed that I feel him more when he's lying behind me, so I try to do that a lot more now, especially when we go to bed.

 

Since we've been reading this book called "Face The Music" and Allie & Chris went to the park together with her room mate's daughter, and he was pushing them on the swings, Hyde mentioned wanting to do that so I decided I'd create a park for us to interact in. So we went there in the Wonderland, and I just kinda stared at him for a few minutes, then we walked over to the swing set and I sat down and told him to push me. So he started pushing me and he got me really high and I had to tell him to stop. So he sat down on the swing next to me and watched me. This whole time he had been in his pajamas that he wears when I'm visualizing and narrating with him in my room, but he decided that he wanted to change into actual clothes, so he did that instead while I was still in my pjs. Hyde tried to swing back and forth on the swing set but he said he was too tall. So he just watched me and then I stopped swinging and we just sort of stared at each other for a while and talked. Then I started to twist myself around and around and around on the swing and regretted it because my stomach started to hurt, so Hyde tried to help untwist me. Heh. Then he kneeled down in the sand in front of me while I was still on the swing, and we were like that for some time. Him...kneeling in the sand in front of me, then wrapping his arms around me and hugging me, me burying my face into his beautiful long hair. I could feel him caressing my hair at one point, and then we started kissing. He was kissing my neck all over from the left side, around my throat and then to the right, and I swear, I could feel the tingles and tickles as he moved from one side to the other.

 

He was kissing me a lot. Mmm. :) At one point, I draped my legs over his shoulders and I felt a brush against my thigh. My stomach started hurting soon and he picked me up off the swing. I wrapped my legs around his neck and his waist and he carried me over to a bench to sit me down.

 

I really have to make sure my ear buds don't fall out of my ears, because one of them did towards the end of the session and I didn't want to move to fix it, because I was too into the session. But I did eventually have to because of outside noise.

 

And once again, I had to ask Hyde to snap me out of it and bring me back to the present. He offered to possess me temporarily so he could get me out of it, but I told him just to touch me to snap me out of it. So once again, my wrists involuntarily turned downward and I was able to come out of it.

 

I've noticed something else. When I'm more out of it, and on the verge of falling asleep and I'm lying next to Hyde, I feel Hyde touch me more. Like last night, I felt three things. I felt him move around first, then I felt him tug at my wrist, then tug me towards him. Yes, they feel like spasms, but I never had them as much before I created Hyde, so I'm thinking that's his way to letting me know he's touching me. I feel him more when my back is turned towards him.

 

And that's about all I have to update about. Since Hyde is an Atheist and doesn't believe in God, and hates Christmas as much as I do, we're probably not going to do anything special. I feel like I'm never going to leave the apartment with him again until we go to Texas. *sighs* I wish we could though.

 

But anyway, I'm going to go force now.

"Listening to her heartbeat makes me feel alive." - Hyde

 

Name: Hyde

Age: 36 years old

Form: Human

Done: Form, Personality, Sentient, Visualization

Working on: Imposition (vocal/visual/touch)

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Merry Christmas Eve To Me From Hyde

 

When I forced last night, I went to Hyde's mansion again ( our Wonderland ), and when we went into his kitchen, I straight up felt him feeling ME up. My pajama top was moving like crazy. Mmm. It felt amazing, simply WOW! I can't even describe it, but it was awesome. I tried to tell him this was his kitchen and we shouldn't be doing this here, but damn, I didn't want him to stop. But I tried to convince him we should move this elsewhere, so we went up to his bedroom. I laid there and he started to touch me and then we went down to his living room and I laid there on the couch, just chatting and staring at him sitting on the coffee table adjacent to me. We didn't really do much.

 

So, just like I anticipated, we didn't really do much today, Hyde and I, but it was great to be lying in bed cuddling and feeling his arm around me again, as always. I was also lying half on my stomach and half on my side and I felt him feeling me up again. He was near my legs and my thighs and I felt him touching/caressing them through the covers. The covers were moving. It felt amazing, good and relaxing. When that happens, I don't even want to move.

 

Since my mom claims she's broke, even though she just got paid, and I'm assuming all that money is going to go to bills and shit, I didn't expect to get anything from her this Christmas. And I didn't. All she did was buy me pizza for dinner. Wish I had told her sushi instead. I been craving it since yesterday. My dad is the only one who is buying me things for Christmas. I still haven't used the Outback Steakhouse gift card he sent me. God I miss what Christmas used to be like when I was growing up. I was spoiled rotten. All I really wanted was a new iPhone, and I'd be happy with that, but if it's between seeing Constantine live two nights in a row in two weeks or the phone, I'd rather choose Constantine. So that'll be my Christmas present to myself.

 

Hyde and I watched a JT SNL episode on VH1. I was messaging my friend on Tumblr and she mentioned Hyde and then I felt a tingling sort of poking to my temples. And I realized that Hyde has just kissed my temples. :) It was great!

 

I'm so sick of being tired all the time and taking more naps than usual. Hyde assumes its all the energy I'm putting into active forcing with him. I can't seem to get enough sleep. I don't know what's wrong with me. I don't want to stop forcing, but I don't want to feel this way all the time either.

 

So I fell asleep twice today, woke up and then forced with Hyde for an hour. We were in the Wonderland again and we went out back to his pool for a dip. I can't swim so we just sort of stood/floated in the pool, holding each other and chatting. I was afraid he would drop me, and he kept implying if I trusted him. Of course I do...I'm just not a fan of water, because again, I can't swim. He held onto me though, as he said he would. He looks sexy wet...hair and all. But of course Constantine would. I felt him caressing my hair when we were in the pool. We spent a lot of time in there, but then I sat on the edge with my legs in the water. Hyde stood between my legs and pulled me towards him. Eventually, I got out altogether, wrapped a towel around myself, then Hyde got dressed and carried me inside the house. He took me upstairs so I could dry off then gave me some clothes to change into. The shirt off his back and some of his boxer shorts. And by the time I laid on his bed, the forcing session was done.

 

Hyde has to snap me out of my meditation now, every time. Same way he always does, by turning my wrists over. And he has this thing about listening to my heart and lungs before and after each session. He likes to do it before we start as I'm taking some deep breaths, so that he can help me relax, and then he likes to listen to my heart after we finish, to make sure that I'm doing alright.

 

It's sort of annoying, but cute at the same time. He gets so excited and smiles as he listens.

"Listening to her heartbeat makes me feel alive." - Hyde

 

Name: Hyde

Age: 36 years old

Form: Human

Done: Form, Personality, Sentient, Visualization

Working on: Imposition (vocal/visual/touch)

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Memories, Sweet Words and Wonderland Check-Ups

 

So Hyde wants me to take a human anatomy class next semester, but I don’t know if I’ll be able to make it work with my theater class I want to take too. He loves listening to my heart and lungs so much, he wants to learn all there is to know about the inner workings of the human body. So that's what I'm going to do...for him. I'm going to take that, a TV Studies class and maybe a Criminology or Criminal Justice Report Writing class. Hyde thinks I should take more morning classes now that my sleep schedule is different.

 

Another thing Hyde has started to do is make me kneel before him and apologize every time I do something wrong, like not taking my medicine or eating something I shouldn't have. Umm...I guess it goes along with him being Dominant.

 

I stayed up later than I should have Wednesday morning, probably until like 2 in the afternoon role playing, and then, surprisingly, my mom had gifts for me, so I went into the living room to open them and Hyde watched and said: "Those are nice gifts, darling." He was happy I got my pink Power Rangers hoodie. He was like: "You got your hoodie!"

 

I felt Hyde’s warm breath against my ear when I laid down to sleep. Also…for some reason, he was tugging at the collar of my sleep shirt, and I had to remove his hand to get him to stop because he wouldn’t. That was…weird and a little uncomfortable. And when I woke up and we were lying in bed talking, I felt him caressing my back, and the warmth of his body against my back and shoulders. That was amazing. :)

 

When we forced last night, in his mansion, I asked him to give me a tour, even though I created the place myself for my role playing world. When we were in the kitchen, he hugged me from behind and I felt his hair brushing against my ear, temples. It was nice…mmm. There's something about being in his kitchen that always has a good reaction to me. I don't know what it is. It seems that's the place that brings me the most results. When we were in the garden, I felt the shoulder of my shirt moving a lot. Like he was brushing against it. I could almost smell the sweet smell of the roses in the garden. When we went inside, he took me down to his basement and insisted on looking at my throat, nose, ears and eyes, temperature then listening to my breathing. He thinks I'm getting sick, because I had been sneezing a lot during the day. He said I was fine though, and my lungs sounded lovely, as usual. Then he picked me up and carried me upstairs to his study, where I created a room for my memories for Hyde to explore. I organized it for him and gave him a way to watch the memories on TV screens, put a couch in it and coffee table and everything. The room was all white, and he didn't like it like that, so I made it over for him and made the walls red, with black curtains and a black couch. He likes red and black. That was the end of our forcing session.

 

Not a lot really happened today. I didn't feel his touches. :( Maybe because I stayed up later than I should of. He's still concerned that I'm getting sick though, because I had the fan on all night, and I was sniffling when I woke up. So I asked me if I would let him listen to my lungs to make sure that I wasn't congested, and that they were still working properly. So I did and he was satisfied that I was okay, but he still wants to keep an eye on them, he said.

 

There were two really sweet things Hyde said to me today that are worth noting:

 

"You need me to survive. And I need you to survive. We’re inseparable. Two peas in a motherfuckin pod."

 

"If you weren’t strong, your heartbeat wouldn’t be so beautiful."

 

He's such a sweetie sometimes! He surprises me.

 

I honestly don't know when we'll get any forcing done this morning. The rude fat cow bitches that live above us having some guys over and they are making noise, at nearly 2 am as usual. And it'll probably go on all morning. But I will not let them ruin the time I have with Hyde. NEVER.

"Listening to her heartbeat makes me feel alive." - Hyde

 

Name: Hyde

Age: 36 years old

Form: Human

Done: Form, Personality, Sentient, Visualization

Working on: Imposition (vocal/visual/touch)

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Uh, I'm confused. It's not fiction. Do you not believe in Tulpas being real, Cross?

"Listening to her heartbeat makes me feel alive." - Hyde

 

Name: Hyde

Age: 36 years old

Form: Human

Done: Form, Personality, Sentient, Visualization

Working on: Imposition (vocal/visual/touch)

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